Amanda Posted December 8, 1998 Share Posted December 8, 1998 My first love and I met almost three years ago. My parents decided after a year that things were getting to serious and forbid us to see each other. I don't live at home anymore , and we are still seeing each other, but I haven't told my parents yet. We are both twenty years old, but when I am around them I become eight again. He has now asked me to marry him. Of course, I said yes. How do I tell them. Link to post Share on other sites
Seira Salemon Posted December 9, 1998 Share Posted December 9, 1998 My first love and I met almost three years ago. My parents decided after a year that things were getting to serious and forbid us to see each other. I don't live at home anymore , and we are still seeing each other, but I haven't told my parents yet. We are both twenty years old, but when I am around them I become eight again. He has now asked me to marry him. Of course, I said yes. How do I tell them. I think your parents should not do that to you because you are an adult and you don't live with them anymore. I had a similar case like you before. What my parents did to me only made me go against them and continue seeing my ex-boyfriend behind their back. But I want to tell you one thing, (according to my experience), most of the time parents never have any intention to hurt their kid/s, they are just worry if something bad could happen to you. In my humble opinion; it's ok that you are seeing each other but don't make any commitment yet. Because you are very young, attractive and you are entitled to have all the freedom in the world and you still want to experience new things, boyfriends, go anywhere when you want to, etc. , Don't you? From what I read it tell me that you are very focus, you have the courage to establish what you want, that's very good. Just have fun!! And trust me girl, don't get married so soon because regret always come last. I got to let you know that you have plenty of choice out there. Don't pick the first one that come to you. You go to select them. I'm not saying that your boyfriend is not the right one, just remember keeping your option opened. Who knows one day you met a guy from different side of world who will take you travel, etc. (it happened to me). And about your parents, sometimes what they don't know won't hurt them. besides you are not doing the wrong thing. they're just a little worry and a little nosy. sincerely, Seira, friend who care Link to post Share on other sites
carmen Posted December 9, 1998 Share Posted December 9, 1998 My first love and I met almost three years ago. My parents decided after a year that things were getting to serious and forbid us to see each other. I don't live at home anymore , and we are still seeing each other, but I haven't told my parents yet. We are both twenty years old, but when I am around them I become eight again. He has now asked me to marry him. Of course, I said yes. How do I tell them. There is only one way and that is to simply tell them, life is too short and you have to live it to the fullest. Sincerely, Carmen Link to post Share on other sites
Ryan Posted December 9, 1998 Share Posted December 9, 1998 Although it would be nice to have approval from your family, once you are an adult it is not necessary. They can voice concerns and offer advice, but they have no direct control as to your life. Now, since you said that when you are with your parents you feel like a kid again, I'm going to venture that they have been overbearing, intrusive, and controlling in your upbringing. That makes this current boyfriend all the more exciting for you on two levels: first, this is directly defying your parents and second, getting married with him would function as a sort of "escape" from the situation. Neither of those are good reasons to get married. I would think about your motivations and consider your life experience with relationships in your judgment here. As for your parents, you need to sit down with them and force a conversation on an adult to adult level. As soon as they try to assume a higher role, don't hesitate to remind them that you are a grown woman. Don't be rude about it, but be firm in your stance. Hopefully you can open some lines of communication within yourself that you never knew existed. Link to post Share on other sites
pat Posted December 10, 1998 Share Posted December 10, 1998 WHO CARES LIVE LIFE TO ITS FULLEST Although it would be nice to have approval from your family, once you are an adult it is not necessary. They can voice concerns and offer advice, but they have no direct control as to your life. Now, since you said that when you are with your parents you feel like a kid again, I'm going to venture that they have been overbearing, intrusive, and controlling in your upbringing. That makes this current boyfriend all the more exciting for you on two levels: first, this is directly defying your parents and second, getting married with him would function as a sort of "escape" from the situation. Neither of those are good reasons to get married. I would think about your motivations and consider your life experience with relationships in your judgment here. As for your parents, you need to sit down with them and force a conversation on an adult to adult level. As soon as they try to assume a higher role, don't hesitate to remind them that you are a grown woman. Don't be rude about it, but be firm in your stance. Hopefully you can open some lines of communication within yourself that you never knew existed. Link to post Share on other sites
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