nothingbutblueskies Posted March 2, 2011 Share Posted March 2, 2011 (edited) Hello everyone, I stumbled across this site just now and thought maybe you all might provide me a bit of insight into this situation I'm in. I'll try and keep it short, but the gist is I have no idea what signals my friend is sending me, if any, and it's driving me mad. Back story: I met this girl in class about 1.5-2 years ago and was immediately attracted to her personality, plus she's pretty cute too. I really wanted to ask her out back then, but I found out she was in a relationship, so I set all of that aside and just went with it. Our personalities are very similar, so naturally we got along and became good friends. Cut to now: I don't remember when exactly, but her prior relationship ended (probably 6-8 months ago), but I was involved with someone else until fairly recently, however now we're both single and things are getting sort of interesting. We hang out a lot. To the point where there were rumors floating around amongst our mutual friends that we're dating, to which she suggested we continue the ruse and refer to each other as boyfriend/girlfriend. Typically we're getting lunch, dinner or working on lab work at her house; but almost always, it's just the two of us. What's confusing the hell out of me is the fact that we often talk about relationships/sex and she will explain to me what she is looking for in a guy and I could swear she is describing me. We went out the other night and she did it again, and she was just reading off a list of me. After we finished eating we talked in the restaurant for an hour or so then when we got to her house we sat in the driveway nerding out over music and laughing. However, she's done this before and then started dating someone else, right after. (also another reason why I haven't really done anything). The day after our dinner, she got a text while we were walking somewhere and said something like, 'ugh why do all of my guy friends eventually want to start dating me.' I don't know if we talk about sex and relationships because she's interested, or if I am just a friend she feels she can talk to about it. She's pretty open (ok, really open) about things. I am usually fairly good at reading body language and picking up on signals, in fact I'd say I am better than average, but right now I am so utterly confused that I don't know what to do. Does anyone have any words of wisdom or insight they can offer? I'd be pretty grateful Edited March 2, 2011 by nothingbutblueskies Link to post Share on other sites
Author nothingbutblueskies Posted March 3, 2011 Author Share Posted March 3, 2011 Also, to further clarify, I am fine with whichever way this works out. If we begin dating that would be awesome, but I would be perfectly content keeping her as a friend and moving on. I really just need some outside advice on how to proceed, because up until now I have refrained from overly showing interest (I drop tiny hints here and there, but really too telling) and I feel like my time to do something about this (if there is anything actually going on here) is running out quickly. Link to post Share on other sites
Instigator Posted March 5, 2011 Share Posted March 5, 2011 Wow, you and I are in the EXACT same boat my friend. I have a carbon copy of your situation going on with me and my close female friend right now and it's also driving me crazy. Hopefully someone with some experience in this particular situation or a female perspective can share their experience or give us some insight. Let me ask you this though, when you two are out does she give any signs that she may be interested in you as more than a friend? You know like, heavy flirting, touching, undivided attention and what not? Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 6, 2011 Share Posted March 6, 2011 Make a move and find out. Just be sure you're ready to lose it all. Link to post Share on other sites
indija Posted March 8, 2011 Share Posted March 8, 2011 Well, maybe she's in the same boat too? Maybe she doesn't realize you're the guy she's describing. Whenever I say stuff like that around my friend, he's always like "oh, yeah, that's me," but then nothing ever seems to come of it. So now that I'm finally seeing all that and going, "yeah, he's everything on my list, wow," he's like "I'm so happy being single." Kind of makes you wonder, right? So, what I'm saying is, if you really do like her, and you're hoping for something real with her, you may have to make a move and at least let her know there's a possibility. Cuz honestly, if she really does see you as just a friend she can chat/vent with, that's probably gonna drive you nuts. Lol, I'm just sayin, cuz it's driving me nuts. You say you're fine with how it works out either way...is that really, really true? Link to post Share on other sites
Yamaha Posted March 8, 2011 Share Posted March 8, 2011 I am just a friend she feels she can talk to about it Ding,Ding. We have a winner.... Link to post Share on other sites
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