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A girl initiating conversation is a definate IOI?


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Okay, I seriously doubt it is, but this is what I read on a website,

 

I want to first address the most basic IOI that all men miss out on by virtue of a lack of self-esteem. It’s the most common, and it’s also the most puzzling, since it’s the most obvious IOI there is. If a girl EVER, in any circumstance, initiates conversation with you, they ARE interested in you, whether it be consciously or subconsciously. There is no second guessing here. Females DO NOT talk to guys on their own accord that they’re not interested in. It just doesn’t happen. Sure, she might not be saying “Oh this guy looks like he could be cool, maybe we could possibly date, and even get married someday,” but her brain is definitely entering her into a situation she WANTS to be in. Always assume in this case that you are being given a freebie, and never doubt yourself.

 

Link to his full post, http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt20753.html

 

It sounds as though he's saying interested, as in, not interested in the literal sense, but actually attracted to you (as that is what an IOI is supposed to mean)

 

I really can't see why it would be true, I mean, there's been times where I've started a conversation with a guy (I'm obviously a guy too and straight), but it doesn't mean I'm attracted to him.

 

Is it supposed to be different with girls then? Or is the guy I quoted full of ****?

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As a female, I would say that's untrue. I talk to people because they're interesting, to be friendly, or sometimes simply to be polite. Just because I talk to someone, that doesn't mean I'm attracted to them, otherwise I wouldn't talk to elderly men, married men, adolescents, or other women!

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Actually, I HATE it when a guy assumes I Am interested in them just because I talk to them, or look at them twice.

 

Furthermore, I HATE the notion of guys being annoyed when an average or unnattractive girl, talks to them, and the guy is annoyed because he thinks the girl ( who is does not think is very attractive), is interested in him.

 

I have a friend like this; he is into body building at the gym and takes good care of his body, and he has had a LOT of over weight, very unnatractive women hit on him. And yes, they do actual hitting on him, not just talking apparently.

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I knew it wasn't true. It was just wishful thinking on my part since some girls have started conversation with me, and I was really hoping that it was because they were attracted to me.

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Furthermore, I HATE the notion of guys being annoyed when an average or unnattractive girl, talks to them, and the guy is annoyed because he thinks the girl ( who is does not think is very attractive), is interested in him.

.

 

is that true? I'll always talk to people if they're being polite to me unless I'm busy doing something or in a rush to get somewhere... I'm sure most people are the same???

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I knew it wasn't true. It was just wishful thinking on my part since some girls have started conversation with me, and I was really hoping that it was because they were attracted to me.

 

It doesn't mean they weren't! It just doesn't mean they were. Really reading body language is the key.

 

Of course it also depends on the setting. If you're in a club/bar I'd doubt a girl would talk to you unless she was at least a little interested.

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It doesn't mean they weren't! It just doesn't mean they were. Really reading body language is the key.

 

Of course it also depends on the setting. If you're in a club/bar I'd doubt a girl would talk to you unless she was at least a little interested.

 

It just all seems too complicated to me (see my topic in the relationships forum). I don't know why I bother, I should just forget about all this **** and live my life as an Incel.

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Well it also depends on the words:

 

"Excuse me, what's the time?"

"Can you take our picture?"

 

Might be attracted to you, but not why they're talking to you.

 

"Nice hat/shirt/boots"

 

This is a compliment and I'd always take it as though she had some level of interest. Though any girls feel free to tell me i'm wrong.

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Well it also depends on the words:

 

"Excuse me, what's the time?"

"Can you take our picture?"

 

Might be attracted to you, but not why they're talking to you.

 

"Nice hat/shirt/boots"

 

This is a compliment and I'd always take it as though she had some level of interest. Though any girls feel free to tell me i'm wrong.

 

I've only had two compliments from women in the whole of my life.

 

The first time was when a woman was cutting my hair, and she said my hair really suits me when it's short.

 

The second time was when another woman was cutting my hair, and she said to someone who was with me 'isn't the colour of his hair really lovely'

 

I'm not sure if these things mean they were attracted to me, or whether they were just being honest and weren't attracted to me. Still, when they gave me these compliments it felt so nice, I felt so happy. I still think back about them now, and they bring a smile to my face.

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I don't think initiating conversation should ever be considered 100% as an indicator interest. Some people just want to comment on something and that's it. Just to maybe be nice, or whatever.

 

This holds true for talking to women too. I absolutely HATE it when women assume that if I talk to them, or ask them about something, they think I'm interested or hitting on them. It baffles me when they think that any guy who approaches is automatically trying to flirt with them.

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