Author Urgie Posted March 14, 2011 Author Share Posted March 14, 2011 xxoo i understand what you mean. But i am not even thinking of who would "do better". I have a kink, that she doesn't share. I tried as hard as possible within reason, to get her to see my side and possibly give it a shot .. but its just not for her. There isnt anything more id like to do about it, because i dont want to risk losing her. My wife is amazing on every level, with or without this fantasy being fulfilled. There is no way in hell i would risk ruining or losing what i have. It has been dropped, completely. Yes, i do still think of it, and yes it eats at me a little bit. But honestly, it is getting easier and easier almost daily to deal with, or accept the fact that this wont be happening. What i have, is way more important to me than anything i can dream about, or fantasize about. Link to post Share on other sites
WorldIsYours Posted March 14, 2011 Share Posted March 14, 2011 Dude your wife tells you to make it quick before sex? How disrespectful. I do agree with some points, but the cuckoldry is over the top and in reality, will lead to disaster. Being a cuck or polyamorous is not a road you want to walk down. I do agree that more spontaneous sex should be tried out if your wife stops being mean and selfish. You're catching a lot of flakes from sexually conservative women on here, who are only diagreeing with you because you're a man. That happens a lot here on LS. You may need to go to a men's forum to get better advice. Link to post Share on other sites
Lauriebell82 Posted March 14, 2011 Share Posted March 14, 2011 Yes, i do still think of it, and yes it eats at me a little bit. But honestly, it is getting easier and easier almost daily to deal with, or accept the fact that this wont be happening. Urgie, I'm not trying to put a damper on things, but you have said this in previous threads. That you would "drop it completely" but it's hard for you to do because it's something you really want. What's going to be different this time? I would suggest you try aversion therapy, it's a way of training yourself to associate your fantasy with a negative stimuli. So an example would be wearing a rubber band around your wrist and whenever you think about your fantasy you pull the rubber band. The "pain" from the rubber band snap associates the thought with something negative. What I'm getting at, is that it's not going to be as easy as "just dropping it." Eventually with time, I think the urges/cravings will decrease, but what are you going to do in the meantime? Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted March 14, 2011 Share Posted March 14, 2011 xxoo i understand what you mean. But i am not even thinking of who would "do better". . Sorry, Urgie, I should have explained that the "she could do better" thing was in response to this question: What about my wife having a good thing and not wanting to lose it? . Of course your wife doesn't want to lose you, but losing the guy who makes her feel bad about her sexuality isn't such a loss, you know? She could "do better" and find a guy who appreciates her as she is (and it wouldn't be difficult at all!).....just as she appreciates you as you are and doesn't try to force her sexual ideal onto you. Dude your wife tells you to make it quick before sex? How disrespectful. I do agree with some points, but the cuckoldry is over the top and in reality, will lead to disaster. Being a cuck or polyamorous is not a road you want to walk down. I do agree that more spontaneous sex should be tried out if your wife stops being mean and selfish. You're catching a lot of flakes from sexually conservative women on here, who are only diagreeing with you because you're a man. That happens a lot here on LS. You may need to go to a men's forum to get better advice. No, WIY, that was another poster on the thread. Urgie's wife is is far from mean and selfish in bed. And, no, we are not disagreeing with him because he is a man, or because we are sexually conservative. We are disagreeing because we are worried that he will drive away a true gem of a wife! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Urgie Posted March 15, 2011 Author Share Posted March 15, 2011 We are disagreeing because we are worried that he will drive away a true gem of a wife! I agree with that. And i dont think it matters what forum i am on. Yes i love this fantasy, yes i tried to talk her into it. Arguably, moreso than i should have. But the fact is if it ever was going to happen it would have started with a discussion between the 2 of us. We had the discussion, and it went nowhere. In fact i felt it had an inverse effect, meaning it almost created a problem. Which is why i am dropping the discussion and the hope. in fact i looked for a way to delete this thread but apparently we cant Link to post Share on other sites
Toodamnpragmatic Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 I agree with that. And i dont think it matters what forum i am on. Yes i love this fantasy, yes i tried to talk her into it. Arguably, moreso than i should have. But the fact is if it ever was going to happen it would have started with a discussion between the 2 of us. We had the discussion, and it went nowhere. In fact i felt it had an inverse effect, meaning it almost created a problem. Which is why i am dropping the discussion and the hope. in fact i looked for a way to delete this thread but apparently we cant Actually probably a good choice by the moderators as all your threads should stay and be warnings to anyone thinking of going down the same path as you. And for you a reminder of what a butthead you have been throughout the entire time.... Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted March 15, 2011 Share Posted March 15, 2011 I would think my Hubby had lost his mind if he started going on about threesomes and all that other leery weird stuff you want. If she was into it all that, you would be doing it by now surely. Without help, I don't think you are going to change. I bet you give off a creepy vibe that makes your wife want sex to be over with quickly but you don't see it. Yuck! .. I reckon she will leave at some point. Take care, Eve x Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted March 19, 2011 Share Posted March 19, 2011 At some point I will have to take a deeper look at this discussion. It is kind of like another thread on here but with some differences. H'mmm.. LS is like CSI in some respects. Take care, Eve x Link to post Share on other sites
tnttim Posted March 19, 2011 Share Posted March 19, 2011 The direct approach never works with women, even the coolest most down to Earth 1's don't get the direct approach. I bet when you bring these fantasies up she says, "what I'm not good enough for you." or something along those lines. You have to figure out the sweet science of subtely, and vageness. You have to learn how to get what you want without being so direct. You also have to respect the sanctity of your marriage Link to post Share on other sites
Lovee Posted March 19, 2011 Share Posted March 19, 2011 Why do i have to have these desires? Why do i have to feel repressed? Why do i have to feel like either i give up what i want, or i lose my wife? your wife is not fine and happy why is she feeling pressured..why does her husband not only desire her you are frustrated that she is not giving into your demands or suggestions..she is feeling that equally frustrated that you are not backing off you want more she wants something else neither of you are getting what you want i recently read a story of a man who pressured his woman into making out with another female...and she ended up turning into a lesbian and he was devastated careful what you wish for Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts