Bingo999 Posted March 22, 2011 Share Posted March 22, 2011 I met a guy when he was on vacation where I live in NYC. We shared a really intimate night but did not sleep together. I told him I planned to visit London soon and he mentioned he had always wanted to live in NYC. We messaged back and forth on Facebook for 5 months until I told him my friends and I were coming to London, where he lives (my father also lives there) From there we started texting non-stop but there were periods where he wouldn't write for 5-10 days and I wouldn't try to contact him. We Skyped once for 45 minutes. He mentioned he wanted to see me for as much time as I could give him while I was there but he understood I was with a group. He wanted to take me for a date on Monday. So I got there and didn't hear from him until Monday afternoon. He then messaged me at 11pm telling me he was still at work (sent a photo to prove it - I didn't request) but never mentioned our date. We ended up hanging out a few days later as my friends and I traveled to another city Tuesday. It was amazing. We talked non-stop for 3 hours in a crowded, loud club. He came back with me, great night but again I didn't skip with him -- just don't feel I'm there yet. I had one more night in London and he had to go to a friend's birthday. He also figured I'd want to be with my friends. I would have loved to see him more and I didn't really understand why he didn't make more of an effort. Skip forward two weeks and we have been texting again. I finally asked why he was so hot and cold and he said "it would be pretty frustrating if it was 'hot' all the time!" later... "You know there is something great between us though. I could tell that within 10 secs of seeing you again." I guess I'm trying to figure that out. I've asked him to visit me and he talks about things we will do together but never actually says he's coming. I know it's still early (I just got back) but I'm wondering if this is just doomed and if he sees it more of a fantasy while I feel SO strongly connected to him. I'm just trying to keep my heart open but also protect myself. Sigh. Link to post Share on other sites
folieadeux Posted March 23, 2011 Share Posted March 23, 2011 I honestly get more of a "friend" vibe from this guy. If he wanted more, I think he'd make more of an effort to spend time with you, whether your friends were there or not. You could have all spent time together, or he could have invited you to his friend's party. The gaps in contact also don't make any sense. To me, all of this sounds like missed opportunity when you're really interested in someone romantically. Can this work? Sure it can. But both people have to want it. Link to post Share on other sites
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