RB123 Posted March 22, 2011 Share Posted March 22, 2011 Hi my name is Chris and I am a 29 year old male. I’ve been single for about 6 years now, but all that time have been admittedly infatuated with a girl I met at university in Edinburgh, and have been very close friends to her ever since. All this time I have been madly in love with her, and I really get the impression there is a very special bond between us, although except for a few 'moments' along the way, she never used to reciprocate my advances, even though she is always inviting me to stay with her and telling me she loves me all the time. I have tried to get away from her in the past, most recently explaining to her that if she cannot be my girlfriend it is too painful for me to continue our close friendship. The reason for this is because I was unable to move on from thoughts of her, and I lost all focus in my life goals in order to accommodate what I thought she'd like and maximise my chances of developing something with this special lady.. pretty pathetic i know and I will not go down that route again. Well for 6 whole months I got her out of my mind and did not contact her but sure enough last week we hooked up again at a friend’s birthday party and she was really into me, going into kiss me repeatedly at one point. We spent the whole night just in each others company, having so much fun that we barely hung out with the rest of our close friends. It was so good being so close to her that evening and she told me she had made a mistake and that when I had been apart from her she realised how much she missed me. Regrettably it did not occur to me to seize the moment and discuss what happens next (i.e. do we get together), and simply continued partying into the night and having a great time together. For that evening we were indeed a couple and briefly I believed my years of effort and pining had paid off! Well now it is a few days later, she is back in her home town and me in mine (2 hours drive apart) and I get the impression I am right back at square one again. I’m due to go stay with her for her birthday soon, but you know I just can’t figure out how we can be together as boyfriend/girlfriend and it is driving me nuts. The times I see her (say monthly) are always arranged occasions/celebrations if you will, and I guess I find it hard to progress to the ‘dating’ side of things and regularly seeing her on a whim, which is obviously important if things are to progress. I just don’t know what to do, how I should play this? Please help with any of your learned wisdom. I REALLY like this girl so much, I don’t want to give up on her, and she obviously feels something for me. Do you think this be progressed at all or are we destined to always be friends? Thanks people.. Link to post Share on other sites
DreamerGirl27 Posted March 24, 2011 Share Posted March 24, 2011 ummm, if she's telling you she loves you and kissing you, she likes you. Ask her out! Like on a real date. Wine and dine her and date her and ask her to be your girlfriend. You can't expect her to. We girls aren't wired that way. Just ask her out. Good luck!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author RB123 Posted March 24, 2011 Author Share Posted March 24, 2011 I guess it's been so hardwired into both our psyches over the years that we are just good friends that I find it hard to ask her on a date like that for some reason. No doubt my indecision, timidness and laziness cost me way back when we first met all those years ago, time to change all that, or at least give it a damn good try! Thank you for spelling out the glaringly obvious, that so often evades us when it is in fact right in front of our eyes.. you are right, that is what is required and I am gonna go for it and call her later today to see if she wants to get together over the weekend. Worst case scenario she says no and can't make it, and I am no worst off sat at home on my own then I would have been otherwise. Fingers crossed. I will let you know how it goes Link to post Share on other sites
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