still confused why we arnt together

[tom_gbr]

its been a month now since i have been apart from my ex girlfriend of six months, she has given me all the reasons so many times but i still cant take it in and understand where it all went wrong.

 

The reasons she gave for breaking up with me where because:

 

we were both looking for different things in life because of our age difference, me being 20 and she being 16.

 

she needed to be on her own right now to sort herself out as there is a lot going on in her life and she cant be there for me or have a boyfriend.

 

she needs a boyfiend that can make her smile and laugh and recentley i havent been doing that ( i had a car accident so seeing her was harder and i had no money to see her and was failing uni so it was real hard for me to be upbeat and happy )

 

and that she is also worried that if she stays with me she might be missing out on something

 

i understood all this but because of other things she has said, i came out of this relationship really confused. when we broke up she said that she still has feelings for me and that she still loves me and that i had done nothing wrong.

 

i made the whole breakup worse by phoning her daily trying my hardest to get her back

 

im just finding it so hard to take in that when she is ready for a boyfriend and to have someone in her life why cant it be me? i love her to the end of the earth and would wait aslong as it takes.

 

i spoke to her for the first time since we broke up on the phone last wednesday and she seemed really happy that i called and we both had loads to talk about. but half way through the phone call i completely forgot that she wasnt my girlfriend and it really got to me so i said to her that she might not hear from me for a while as i finding this really hard.

 

im trying to do no contact starting from after i spoke to her but in my drunken state last night i sent her a text message saying that i was missing her and that hope your ok which i think was stupid.

 

 

she finished it at the worse possible time as well, it was two weeks after i had taken her to paris and on the day that i bought my new car, which was an important part of our relationship as we live two hours apart. also we had planned everything we were going to do in the easter and may holidays.

 

i feel apart when she finished it, couldnt eat, sleep, work and didnt go into uni. i changed my whole life for, i moved back home from uni so i could be closer and put her before all my friends. everything i did was for her. now i feel empty without her, she is my first love and she is amazing, beautful, funny and clever.

 

when we broke up she said that she would still really like to have me in her life as a friend but i dont think i can be right now. also i dont know if this is me being selfish or not but i dont wanna be the friend that she goes to when her latest boyfriend screws her around. i really dont wanna be taken for a mug.

 

being apart from her like this is killing me.i think she is scared about being with the same person for a long period of time. i know she still has something for me as we have done so much together. soon she will be going out meeting new guys and it makes me sick just thinking about it.

 

i suppose somewhere inside im hoping that when this happens she will realise what we had was so special and that she will want me back, as i know that no one can love her as much as i do and treat her as well as i did.

[DebraLee]

She is only 16! I think u should rethink this relationship.

My Step Daughter is 16 and pregnant and the father is 19 years old.

She is still in school for crying out loud.

Im not being judgemental Im just saying...give her some time yet before you both get over your heads.

[tom_gbr]

yeah i know shes only 16 but she is very mature for her age.i know i should just let her go and move on buts its the hardest thing to do when my feelings havent changed at all and i still think we could have more amazing times together. guess time will be a healer