bentnotbroken Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 Adore and cherish:confused::confused:hmmm. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 Adore and cherish:confused::confused:hmmm. "In God's grace...Feed your faith and your doubts will starve to death." :confused:hmmmmm LOL! Link to post Share on other sites
Owl Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 You are the second person to ask me that and I keep re-reading my comments trying to determine why now two people have asked me that. I am not looking for help, I'm not sure I have any questions and the moment, I'm here to discuss and learn. Fair enough. I'll explain MY reasoning for asking the questions that I did. Long time experience here has shown me that this site (and others like it) are typically composed of two types of posters. Long term "residents" who initially come to the site seeking advice/support to deal with an immediate crisis, and then remain and provide support/advice to other, newer posters as a result. Short term posters who typically come seeking support or asking for advice on dealing with some aspect of their situation. These posters often come and go...seeking support as their situation evolves and changes, until the situation resolves itself in some fashion. After these two main categories, you tend to run into very small minority groups...the most common being "sock puppets" and "trolls". Both post with the same goal...to stir up dissent and fighting for their own personal entertainment. The key differentiation here is that a "sock puppet" is typically already a poster under another name who posts under multiple identities for various reasons...to support/validate their own views, or even to argue with themselves to bloster their threads and bring in more posters. "Trolls" typically are occasional or single time posters with similar intent...to create strife and entertain themselves with the fighting that ensues. One way to do this is to post a viewpoint that they know will be offensive or contrary to some group of posters on the target site. We rarely get a poster that joins the site that doesn't fit one of these four categories. Link to post Share on other sites
noreply110 Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 I have a question, which I am asking out of curiosity, not judgment. What you are describing you are looking for out of these relationships is exactly what I would look for out of a marriage, aside from the length of the relationship. Why can't you get these things you need from your wife? You obviously want to stay married, wouldn't it be less complicated for you if you focused on the one relationship? And since you mentioned your children as being a strong reason to not uproot your present situation, wouldn't it be better for them to have you focused at home, not split mentally and physically in two places? Again, not judging, just honestly curious. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 Hey Owl I'm not sure what category I fall into. I stumbled on the site, thought it looked interesting in that you can talk more openly about an A here than in typical sites, so I thought I'd register and post some. So I did an introduction post, was accused of looking for a date here, told I am not looking for a "strong" relationship and I have a religious zealot making sideways commentary about my thoughts. I don't know which of your categories best describes me. Link to post Share on other sites
PorkRinds Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 (edited) Hey Owl I'm not sure what category I fall into. I stumbled on the site, thought it looked interesting in that you can talk more openly about an A here than in typical sites, so I thought I'd register and post some. So I did an introduction post, was accused of looking for a date here, told I am not looking for a "strong" relationship and I have a religious zealot making sideways commentary about my thoughts. I don't know which of your categories best describes me. Nevahmind. Edited March 25, 2011 by PorkRinds Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 "In God's grace...Feed your faith and your doubts will starve to death." :confused:hmmmmm LOL! Yes we are all in God's grace and when I feed my faith, my doubts don't get jack squat. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 I have a question, which I am asking out of curiosity, not judgment. What you are describing you are looking for out of these relationships is exactly what I would look for out of a marriage, aside from the length of the relationship. Why can't you get these things you need from your wife? You obviously want to stay married, wouldn't it be less complicated for you if you focused on the one relationship? And since you mentioned your children as being a strong reason to not uproot your present situation, wouldn't it be better for them to have you focused at home, not split mentally and physically in two places? Again, not judging, just honestly curious. I hear what you are saying and I appreciate your attempt to connect the dots, I am not going to go into many details about my home life. While it is amusing to read people making **** up about me, or talking ****, I am not going to give nut cases ammunition for their own puritanical issues. I realize you are not one of the nutcases, seriously I do. But I have been working on my marriage for over 10 years, some things are not going to change. They just aren't and it's not like I haven't tried. What's interesting is this is not a huge deal in other cultures, in parts of europe it is pretty common if not ordinary. Puritanical USA, not so much. Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 Hey Owl I'm not sure what category I fall into. I stumbled on the site, thought it looked interesting in that you can talk more openly about an A here than in typical sites, so I thought I'd register and post some. So I did an introduction post, was accused of looking for a date here, told I am not looking for a "strong" relationship and I have a religious zealot making sideways commentary about my thoughts. I don't know which of your categories best describes me. Not a religious anything(man made you know) and I find your statement curious. Something wrong with that? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 Yes we are all in God's grace and when I feed my faith, my doubts don't get jack squat. That is precious! :-) Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 Thank you...his love is precious. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 Thank you...his love is precious. So are you going to date me or not? T or F? ;-) Hubba! Link to post Share on other sites
PorkRinds Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 Hey Owl I'm not sure what category I fall into. Well you posted a thread. What is your objective in starting the thread? What do you want to discuss, specifically? I stumbled on the site, thought it looked interesting in that you can talk more openly about an A here than in typical sites, so I thought I'd register and post some. And so you did. And so far when various people have responded to you in one way or another, you have either evaded their questions or been rude in response. So I did an introduction post, was accused of looking for a date here, told I am not looking for a "strong" relationship and I have a religious zealot making sideways commentary about my thoughts. So, you are looking for a "strong" yet "transient" relationship with an OW that does NOT interfere with your marriage, yet is fulfilling both sexually and emotionally? But your stated previous track record of affairs is a series of unfulfilling sexual relationships, and you have no compunction about cheating on your spouse? Please explain how you think it is possible to have a relationship which you and the OW know going into it will be "transient"--i.e. short term--yet will be meaningful on an emotional basis. Also, please explain why you think you can have a meaningful emotional relationship that is transient with an OW when you have been apparently unable to create a satisfactory relationship in your actual marriage? I don't know which of your categories best describes me. Biting my tongue....biting my tongue.... Link to post Share on other sites
PorkRinds Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 Thank you...his love is precious. The words of a true fanatic. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 pork rind, please go away. Seriously. I will never respond to any question you have or consider anything you have to say. Please find someone new to bestow your awesomeness on. Thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
bentnotbroken Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 The words of a true fanatic. ' :bunny::bunny::bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
TigerCub Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 I hear what you are saying and I appreciate your attempt to connect the dots, I am not going to go into many details about my home life. While it is amusing to read people making **** up about me, or talking ****, I am not going to give nut cases ammunition for their own puritanical issues. I realize you are not one of the nutcases, seriously I do. But I have been working on my marriage for over 10 years, some things are not going to change. They just aren't and it's not like I haven't tried. What's interesting is this is not a huge deal in other cultures, in parts of europe it is pretty common if not ordinary. Puritanical USA, not so much. Hank can ask this because I'm very afraid of marriage... the things that aren't going to change - where they there before you 2 got married? You don't have to go into great detail about the specifics, but I'm really curious. Link to post Share on other sites
PorkRinds Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 I hear what you are saying and I appreciate your attempt to connect the dots, I am not going to go into many details about my home life. Why not? Do you think the details of your home life might reflect badly on you? While it is amusing to read people making **** up about me, or talking ****, I am not going to give nut cases ammunition for their own puritanical issues. "Puritanical"? I realize you are not one of the nutcases, seriously I do. Maybe you are just oversensitive. I thought guys from Texas were supposed to be uber-tough. Like John Wayne. But I have been working on my marriage for over 10 years, some things are not going to change. You can't be sincerely "working on" your marriage if you're cheating on your spouse, and you've been cheating on your spouse quite a while, you've had multiple affairs and are looking for more. They just aren't and it's not like I haven't tried. What's interesting is this is not a huge deal in other cultures, in parts of europe it is pretty common if not ordinary. Puritanical USA, not so much. That's why I suggested you get into a classical quid pro quo mistress situation or a high class escort GFE experience. Of course either option requires expenditure of significant $$$ and maybe you can't afford that, so you would need to find an OW who is gullible enough to buy into letting you call the shots to your convenience. I'm not sure you'll get much help with that, here, though. Link to post Share on other sites
PorkRinds Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 pork rind, please go away. Seriously. I will never respond to any question you have or consider anything you have to say. Please find someone new to bestow your awesomeness on. Thank you. Hank, this is a public discussion board, if you want to put me on "ignore," you're free to do that, but I'm just as entitled to post here as you. Link to post Share on other sites
PorkRinds Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 How many posts does someone need before they can get PM'ing privileges? Ladies of LS, please let us know if and when Hank starts PMing you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 (edited) Hank can ask this because I'm very afraid of marriage... the things that aren't going to change - where they there before you 2 got married? You don't have to go into great detail about the specifics, but I'm really curious. TC, whatever problems you have as a couple they are likely to magnify after you're married. And no need to fear marriage but don't ignore concerns. Usually the only problems that get better after marriage are financial ones, in theory both of your incomes will increase over time and unless you have bad spending habits your debt should decrease. I realize some couples are out of control financially but I think you get my drift. Back to the subject, I was naive in this respect and I ignored or downplayed certain concerns. They only got worse after marriage. And to the stalker known as pork rinds I have two words for you "ignore user" that feature is awesome. I am so sorry your wife stepped out on you, I can appreciate why she did this, I know that had to hurt. Ouch. I'd give you a big ol' hug but you're on my ignore list :-) So how are your online dating pursuits going, got any hot babes waiting in the wings? I bet you get all the chicks here. You are such a stud and manly too. Edited March 25, 2011 by Hank_Tx Link to post Share on other sites
Rose1977 Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 TC, whatever problems you have as a couple they are likely to magnify after you're married. And no need to fear marriage but don't ignore concerns. Usually the only problems that get better after marriage are financial ones, in theory both of your incomes will increase over time and unless you have bad spending habits your debt should decrease. I realize some couples are out of control financially but I think you get my drift. Back to the subject, I was naive in this respect and I ignored or downplayed certain concerns. They only got worse after marriage. And to the stalker known as pork rinds I have two words for you "ignore user" that feature is awesome. I am so sorry your wife stepped out on you, I can appreciate why she did this, I know that had to hurt. Ouch. I'd give you a big ol' hug but you're on my ignore list :-) So how are your online dating pursuits going, got any hot babes waiting in the wings? I bet you get all the chicks here. You are such a stud and manly too. I think this is one of the most hurtful things I have ever seen directed at anyone here. I don't even know PR or his/her situation, but there are a lot of BS's here and a lot of people going through a lot of pain as a result of all types of R issues, and this is just really inappropriate. I would hope someone would stand up for me if it was insinuated that the heartbreak I endured as a result of cheating were my fault. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Hank_Tx Posted March 25, 2011 Author Share Posted March 25, 2011 yes there should be a rule, stalkers like porky man can insult anyone about anything and make insulting insinuations at will, but no one should say anything unkind to him, because he is a pork rind made of fat and salt. ps: I don't even know if Mr Pork Rind has ever been married or not. Link to post Share on other sites
Rose1977 Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 yes there should be a rule, stalkers like porky man can insult anyone about anything and make insulting insinuations at will, but no one should say anything unkind to him, because he is a pork rind made of fat and salt. ps: I don't even know if Mr Pork Rind has ever been married or not. I don't think anyone should be mean to anyone here. If someone came here and said you were a terrible person and called you names for cheating on your wife, I would be defending you. I guess your comment jumped out at me b/c most of us here are a little sensitive to blame being placed on BS's. Honestly, to me as a third party, PorkRind's comments just seemed sarcastic. I don't think they would have bothered me, but I am not in your shoes. I don't think anyone's stalking you here though . I do wish you luck in your situation and hope you find the support you are looking for here. This place has helped me quite a bit. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted March 25, 2011 Share Posted March 25, 2011 So Hank, I'm not going to ask you what you want from this thread. I want to know what you expected from this thread. You seem so angry and sensitive. If you thought this was a place where only affair cheerleaders hang out, you are mistaken. I'm sorry you are not happy with some of the posts, but they do represent the real life emotions that come with infidelity. Again, sorry you are not happy with what some people have to say. I wish you well in your search for an OW to cherish. I do agree with the post that said your wife should have the same opportunity to find an OM she can cherish. Link to post Share on other sites
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