joethomas9 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I'm pretty sure the title explains it all, no matter how misleading it may look. But as to my question. I know almost everyone has asked this question before, but why is it so hard to find someone? It makes me angry... i have literally seen other people on a date having a great time, yet i am alone. I look at other peoples posts about breaking up with someone and things like that, and it makes me realize saying in my mind "at least they had someone to break up with" i know that looks pathetic and it is. but I've been alone my whole life and i still do have one ahead of me... but its just getting too sad to even wait. please help, and please do not criticize me. I understand i just need to toughen up, but this site was my last resort, and its finally come to this. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Ok, Joe, help us out here.... You are....how old.....? Link to post Share on other sites
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I know. It's freakin' impossible to find a girl. Link to post Share on other sites
orangelady Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I know. It's freakin' impossible to find a girl. And it's freaking impossible to find a man.......that is decent and single. Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I know orange. It seems like the decent ones ... male and female.... and most of the non decent ones ... are also taken. I think it's like Carhill says. We should all just assume that to some degree everyone is taken. Taken meaning: Married Enganged Committed Seeing someone Interested in someone Someone is interested in them Even those of us here who are "single" have at least one of the last two at any given time. I think this truth is why people like my father who's 70 say about the same thing about dating and other people being "taken". Respect marriage and engagements... anything less is fair game. It's not our responsibility to ensure the fidelity of other peoples relationships. If someone says they are taken back off to a friendly distance and explore other options. I don't know what else any of us can do. What sucks is when people are Married, Engaged, and/or Committed and 100% happy .... who still flirt and chat you up like they are available. Link to post Share on other sites
TouchedByViolet Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 For some of us reality doesn't become the dream we had in mind or grew up believing in. This can be a tough realization and the truth is luck has a lot to do with it. Keeping yourself busy with the things you can control makes life less hard. And believe in hope. Things can work out one day. Link to post Share on other sites
Ross PK Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Some of us are just different from 'normal' people. Link to post Share on other sites
MistaDynamic Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 I'm pretty sure the title explains it all, no matter how misleading it may look. But as to my question. I know almost everyone has asked this question before, but why is it so hard to find someone? It makes me angry... i have literally seen other people on a date having a great time, yet i am alone. I look at other peoples posts about breaking up with someone and things like that, and it makes me realize saying in my mind "at least they had someone to break up with" i know that looks pathetic and it is. but I've been alone my whole life and i still do have one ahead of me... but its just getting too sad to even wait. please help, and please do not criticize me. I understand i just need to toughen up, but this site was my last resort, and its finally come to this. Maybe you're not giving a reason to choose you and need to learn some game. Here's some advice I'm sure it will help. 1. Make a list of of the type of women you're attracted to. 2. Make you list of the type of women that are attracted to you. The ones that have showed an interest. Now you must discern the differences between list 1 and list 2. You have ask yourself what type of guys , what qualities does the woman I'm attracted to look for in guy.How would that guy dress. If you don't dress like her ideal guy and don't have any these qualities and aren't willing to develop them then you need "get in where you fit in", as they say. You area of finding a partner will only exist in list 2. Which for most will be severely limited since most of us are not hot looking male models. I don't know how old you are but I can say at 39 years old the older you get the younger the women you attract. Right now I have had 18 year olds (and surprisingly younger) looking at me . As well as a few cougars in their 40's. After you reach 30 years old your dating pool includes women younger than you by 10 years to women older than you by 15 years. So there's hope. Just brush on your game and you'll be all good. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Some of us are just different from 'normal' people. Please provide a universally acceptable definition of 'normal'..... Link to post Share on other sites
Disillusioned Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 To break a rule, I'm going to say it outright: women have it easier than men, and this is why... provided a woman is reasonably attractive and doesn't have a disagreeable personality, all she has to do it switch her force field off. Then the only really tough part is having to filter out the jerks and deal an occasional right cross to the persistent ones. Simple as that. Link to post Share on other sites
Annoioso Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 (edited) I sure hope you're right Mistadynamic! lol I completely understand where you're coming from. I'm in my mid 30s and it still seems like an impossible situation to meet someone and I feel like I've missed out on so much socially. I've had about 1 year and change worth of relationships with two girls my whole life--both by extreme fluke...one at 22 and one at about 30/31. I'm not relationship dependent but it was great psychological relief to be intimate/feel desired by someone as brief as it was. The thing is also that I'm quasi-introverted, HATE clubs/lounges, and spent many years of my life holed up working hard at the office. It seems like most other people have done fine here, but for myself my city has been one long, continuous nightmare of always wanting a relationship but never having an in or an opportunity. My best chances or places I felt women were more genuine and real was across the ocean in Europe (never been to S. America/Asia). I am extremely confident I would already be married to a sweet girl and with kids if I was there. Women have it so easy. Don't let their whining and complaining fool you. They have it handed to them on a silver platter from their teens to about 30. Half of them F around during this time then cry and complain that there are no good guys around when the musical chairs has stopped in their 30s. After about 30, it gets much worse for women (90% of their fertility is gone by 30), and supposedly gets better for the average guy (if you've done something with your life). The added dilemma now that I'm cruising through my 30s is that as I get older I am moving further away from the maximum age I'll accept in a woman (late 20s). Edited April 5, 2011 by Annoioso Link to post Share on other sites
Ross PK Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 Please provide a universally acceptable definition of 'normal'..... The majority of everyday people who can attract and get partners. Link to post Share on other sites
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 I think younger women are much too picky. That's why you should work on yourself, and become a successful bodybuilder who's rich and has lots of personality, by the time you're 40. Then you can date plenty of 20 year olds, the same ones that would have turned you down when you were 20. Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted April 5, 2011 Share Posted April 5, 2011 And they'e so much more supple when you're 40. Everyone knows dirty old men are better lovers. Link to post Share on other sites
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