brenda collins Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Iv wondered this all my life. Should we leave it up to the guys... Just met or second chances.. If a guy truly has feelings or loves us will he do all in his power to let us know and not let us slip away??? Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Iv wondered this all my life. Should we leave it up to the guys... Just met or second chances.. If a guy truly has feelings or loves us will he do all in his power to let us know and not let us slip away??? Would you do the same for a guy? Many guys these days have realized that it is dumb to fight for a woman when there is other women out there. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brenda collins Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 mmmm good point actually... So instead of waiting around for them to contact you etc.. Should you be upfront about your feelings.. Link to post Share on other sites
GivenUp0083 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 We'll fight for you to a certain extent, but it has a lot of dependence on how long we've known you, who you are, etc. If I've known you for months and we have made some strong connections, then yeah I'll do what is in my power to give it the best chance to build up on that. But if I hardly know you and I'm thinking of asking you out, I'm not going too far out of my way to "win you over". There should be mutual interest. If you want a guy to pursue you, try thowing him a bone, give him a hint that you are interested in him and give him a reason to make a move. Expecting guys to just ask you out from thin air is not logical. Flirt with a guy a little and give him a reason to think he has a chance. Link to post Share on other sites
Untouchable_Fire Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Iv wondered this all my life. Should we leave it up to the guys... Just met or second chances.. If a guy truly has feelings or loves us will he do all in his power to let us know and not let us slip away??? I fight for women who will fight for me... literally. If I'm at a club and my GF is dancing with her female friends and some guy comes up... I have no issue fighting him. I may actually enjoy it. If she is out dancing with random guys and he feels her up. I'm not gonna fight him... I'm going to dump her. So if you want a guy to put in some effort... be prepared to match. Otherwise your just slag. Link to post Share on other sites
Ginger Beer Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Iv wondered this all my life. Should we leave it up to the guys... Just met or second chances.. If a guy truly has feelings or loves us will he do all in his power to let us know and not let us slip away??? There is a fine line between that and being the annoying pest who keeps texting/calling though. Link to post Share on other sites
Feelin Frisky Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Depends on what you mean. In the great breakup that has left me in ruins I was told that she didn't understand why I wouldn't fight for her. I still have no idea what that meant because I fought so much WITH her to try to salvage our relationship. There wasn't anyone else to fight WITH, so that wasn't an issue. And if it was just a matter of showing that I was faithful and loved her, that's all I did in all my manner. So, I don't get it unless there's something I'm missing. Link to post Share on other sites
Eddie Edirol Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Iv wondered this all my life. Should we leave it up to the guys... Just met or second chances.. If a guy truly has feelings or loves us will he do all in his power to let us know and not let us slip away??? No, not in the beginning, mostly because trying to hard usually turns women off. You wind up getting friend zoned that way. If youre already dating he feels you slipping away, he might fight, but if he knows he let her slip away, its a futile fight. So mostly no. Link to post Share on other sites
waynebrady Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Women who thinks that have a sense of entitlement and are narcisstic and princessy. I'm not gonna jump through hoops and do everything without getting anything back from a woman. And before any of the women here starts twisting my words, no I don't "want" the woman to chase me, No I don't want the woman to wear the pants in the relationship. That seems to be a common among women to imply that the guy is less of a man if he doesn't chase after the woman and jumps through hoops to get her, on the contrary I'd consider any man who does that a loser without self respect. I got to much pride to chase a woman and jump through hoops and put in all the work just to win her over. Link to post Share on other sites
waynebrady Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 There is a fine line between that and being the annoying pest who keeps texting/calling though. Yeah... the thing is women expect men to endlessly chase them to boost their ego. If she really likes the guy I suppose eventually she will give in... after a few months or years and agree to be in a relationship. The thing is. If she doesn't like the guy she'll phone the police and have the man jailed for stalking. But how is the man supposed to know if she likes him or not? Women play hard to get in all instances so it's impossible to know, it's a big gamble really. Link to post Share on other sites
TryingtoUnderstand32 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Depends on what you mean. In the great breakup that has left me in ruins I was told that she didn't understand why I wouldn't fight for her. I still have no idea what that meant because I fought so much WITH her to try to salvage our relationship. There wasn't anyone else to fight WITH, so that wasn't an issue. And if it was just a matter of showing that I was faithful and loved her, that's all I did in all my manner. So, I don't get it unless there's something I'm missing. I'm also dealing with the aftermath of a breakup. I think this question means that if a woman and her boyfriend are having there own issues that probably have more to do with arguements, differences in general, how much will a guy try to salvage it before saying goodbye. My bf decided he was done..I think if he loved me it may have been different. Link to post Share on other sites
waynebrady Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I'm also dealing with the aftermath of a breakup. I think this question means that if a woman and her boyfriend are having there own issues that probably have more to do with arguements, differences in general, how much will a guy try to salvage it before saying goodbye. My bf decided he was done..I think if he loved me it may have been different. The guy should try and salvage it just as much as the girl is trying to salvage it. Not more or less(unless he ****ed up in the first place i suppose) Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 No with a But. Like the other guys have said there are far too many women in the world for a man to chase a woman who's not giving him any positive feedback. Let alone a woman who's giving him negative feedback. But....we all know that "playing hard to get" and "games" are part of dating and relationships. So knowing this men will play along. A woman needs to give a man signals and positive feedback that are equal to or greater than their negative feedback. (This idea is what has been called "interest level" by some PUA's) A woman who wants to make men work a bit for her affection... needs to realize. 1.)Many men will simply walk away and seek an easier woman. 2.)All men will keep their options open as long as you aren't fully committed. 3.)You need to give the man you want positive feedback or he will move on...no matter how pathetic you think he is...no matter how into you he is. (Even Steve Urkel eventually had Myra.... Then Laura suddenly wanted Steves attention.) Link to post Share on other sites
TryingtoUnderstand32 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 The guy should try and salvage it just as much as the girl is trying to salvage it. Not more or less(unless he ****ed up in the first place i suppose) If he isn't in love why would he.. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I don't jump through hoops for any woman who demands it. They only want men to do it so we can boost their ego. Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 (edited) mmmm good point actually... So instead of waiting around for them to contact you etc.. Should you be upfront about your feelings.. Why shouldnt you? Just dont be desperate about it. If you reach out to a guy and he says no or doesnt show positive response then stop and leave the ball in his court. Thats all you have to do. Easy. Initiating is not chasing. Guys like women who initiate, but they dont like to be chased. Women are making things harder for themselves. Edited March 29, 2011 by musemaj11 Link to post Share on other sites
Author brenda collins Posted March 29, 2011 Author Share Posted March 29, 2011 Basically, I saw a guy I was seeing a few months ago on a night out. Our relationship ended very badly (in me having a termination) He was drunk and he admitted he still has feelings and said a part of him wants to move on but a part of him wants to go back. We spoke sober on the day after and he apologised for blurting stuff out but still said he was in tow minds. We didnt really conclude anything. He knows how I feel and I know how he feels but I dont want to push him into anything. Dont know whether to contact him or wait for him. Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Basically, I saw a guy I was seeing a few months ago on a night out. Our relationship ended very badly (in me having a termination) He was drunk and he admitted he still has feelings and said a part of him wants to move on but a part of him wants to go back. We spoke sober on the day after and he apologised for blurting stuff out but still said he was in tow minds. We didnt really conclude anything. He knows how I feel and I know how he feels but I dont want to push him into anything. Dont know whether to contact him or wait for him. I wouldnt want a woman who tells me that she is unsure about her feelings for me. I dont know about you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brenda collins Posted March 30, 2011 Author Share Posted March 30, 2011 Good question? Should you wait on a guy who is not sure what they want? Can a guy love you but not want a relationship. or are guys straighforward and us girls dont realize it! Link to post Share on other sites
musemaj11 Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Good question? Should you wait on a guy who is not sure what they want? Can a guy love you but not want a relationship. or are guys straighforward and us girls dont realize it! Can you love a guy and not want a relationship? Men and women are no different emotionally. Link to post Share on other sites
Author brenda collins Posted March 30, 2011 Author Share Posted March 30, 2011 I guess if I love someone I want a relationship with them. However sometimes love does not conquer all. Is it possible to love someone but for circumstances to be too difficult for you to be together? Does love conquer all? Link to post Share on other sites
MistaDynamic Posted March 30, 2011 Share Posted March 30, 2011 Is it possible to love someone but for circumstances to be too difficult for you to be together? Yep Does love conquer all? Nope ...... Link to post Share on other sites
EmperorR Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Nope, why would a man fight for a woman? it's funny women seem to think this yet in breakups when guys actually fight for another chance hes a annoying ex who won't leave her alone. One thing I learned a woman dumps me? allirght see ya, next. I'm not fighting not calling she knows my number. If a chick likes me and another guy and can't decide i'm not fighting either,. Link to post Share on other sites
somedude81 Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Fight for you? Who is he fighting and why? Link to post Share on other sites
Mrlonelyone Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Nope, why would a man fight for a woman? it's funny women seem to think this yet in breakups when guys actually fight for another chance hes a annoying ex who won't leave her alone. One thing I learned a woman dumps me? allirght see ya, next. I'm not fighting not calling she knows my number. If a chick likes me and another guy and can't decide i'm not fighting either,. The above is like the creepy vs cute or attentive vs 'stalkerish' distinctions. They have less to do with the mans behavior and more to do with the womans interest or state of mind. Link to post Share on other sites
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