ayjt80 Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 My ex broke up with me about a month ago but now totally avoids me. Its wasnt like I ever treated her badly. In fact I treated her like a queen. She said that she isnt ready for a relationship. I see her regularly at work, she works in a different department and when she sees me she runs the other way but if im talking with someone else and I laugh and I glance over to her she has the biggest smile but will look away quickly. If i have to talk to her for work related stuff i can feel the tension because she doesnt want to talk to me. She told my/her friend that she doesnt want to lose me as a friend after the breakup. Im confused. Any female perspective on this??? Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 Because she finds it better to avoid contact with you, for whatever reason. Link to post Share on other sites
Fufu Posted March 31, 2011 Share Posted March 31, 2011 let me ask you this Would you prefer her to continue talking to you, and making you feel maybe she still has feelings for you and want to be with you again? As every break ups s*x, especially for the dumpees after they received the break up bomb from the dumper, please seek NC (No Contact) right away for your own good. I have zero idea why she avoids you because i think every individuals has their own reasons. And the reasons you don't have to know because it will only make you more confused. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ayjt80 Posted April 1, 2011 Author Share Posted April 1, 2011 I didnt go out with her long enough to be totally into her. I admit I started to like her but if she wanted to be just friends i would be good with that. Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted April 1, 2011 Share Posted April 1, 2011 Plainly she doesn't. Link to post Share on other sites
tearsofaclown Posted April 1, 2011 Share Posted April 1, 2011 i think its just because she wants to give you both space. Maybe she is finding it hard to so sometimes having time out helps. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ayjt80 Posted April 1, 2011 Author Share Posted April 1, 2011 Plainly she doesn't. hey betterdeal your one of the most negative posters ive seen, Are you having issues? i hope you get them worked out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ayjt80 Posted April 1, 2011 Author Share Posted April 1, 2011 i think its just because she wants to give you both space. Maybe she is finding it hard to so sometimes having time out helps. I didnt think about it that way. Thanx for the feedback. Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted April 1, 2011 Share Posted April 1, 2011 hey betterdeal your one of the most negative posters ive seen, Are you having issues? i hope you get them worked out. What do you want me to say? Link to post Share on other sites
SummersEve Posted April 1, 2011 Share Posted April 1, 2011 My take on it is the smiles and saying something about not wanting to lose you as a friend are just clumsy attempts to "be nice". But that she does not want to get it started up again and probably feels bad about hurting you. Usually when you break up with someone you just want to go your separate ways, not to have to deal with their sad face and questions. And if you are the one who did not want the break up, it is easy to read hope into the smallest things, because of course it's what you wish for. I would just stay out of her way and forget her. If she wanted you back I doubt it would be any barely-there puzzling hints, she would say so. Sorry. Link to post Share on other sites
silic0ntoad Posted April 1, 2011 Share Posted April 1, 2011 To answer your original question, as well as put it plainly, she doesn't want to be with you. Hence her avoidance. In reality, she's doing you a favor. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ayjt80 Posted April 1, 2011 Author Share Posted April 1, 2011 To answer your original question, as well as put it plainly, she doesn't want to be with you. Hence her avoidance. In reality, she's doing you a favor. Thats what i kinda figured, I guess its time to cut my losses. Link to post Share on other sites
Stickyis7 Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 It can be because she is afraid to get her feelings involved @ this point in time. Avoid her and try not giving her any extra eye contact for about a week. Be really NICE to her and keep your responses @ work professional and very short. Ex:(No.Yes.Yup.maybe.umm) Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 Your ex gf is avoiding you because she's your ex gf. When people break up, this is usually what happens- one or both parties feels the need to distance themselves for whatever reason. Some people can jump into the friendship route, but most cannot. Maybe, down the road a bit it might change, maybe not. Everyone handles a break up differently. I wouldn't overthink it too much. Just adopt a position of ignoring her, and if at some point she is interested in a friendship, then take it from there. Link to post Share on other sites
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