Giving too much?

[michele]

I'm glad I found this site. I really need advice and hope I've come to the right place. I've been dating the same person for a year and a half. I'm 30, he's 22. Lately he is slacking off... not coming here when he says he will... not giving me any affection... just acting like he is the only one who matters.

 

I found a "love" letter in his car last week from a 17(!!) year old who works with him. She said she loved him and would f*ck him anytime, anywhere, anyplace, anyhow. I confronted him and he said it was just a girl that was infatuated with him. I went to his place of work last Thursday (a restaurant) and saw her. Yes, she is still a little girl. She walked up to me and said he was breaking up with me. I told her that she doesnt want to f*ck with me. I now find out that she ran into the back hysterically crying after I left.

 

I was talking to another girl that works there today and she said this girl cries all the time for my boyfriend and only waits for him to come by her so she can hang on him.

 

This makes me wonder what he did or said to her to make her this obsessed with him... or do 17 year olds get like this? I cant remember that far back.

 

He says he's not interested in her... she really is a baby still. But I know how guys will flirt with girls and that worries me.

 

HELP!!!! What am I supposed to do... I could talk to her again and tell her this has gone far enough. I could kill my boyfriend. I love this guy with all my heart and I'm going through alot of problems in my life right now and having him here makes me feel better.

 

Okay... again... HELP!!

 

Please give me advice as this has me in tears most of the day.

 

I wonder if he realizes sleeping with a 17 year old is statutory rape?

[Ryan]

This is a questionable situation indeed. Usually when a man starts pulling away from a relationship, he is pulling towards someone else. This letter is quite suspect as well....if it was purely nothing he wouldn't have kept it. I don't think dealing with this other young lady is the right choice of action. She's not a part of your relationship, and if he is going to be unfaithful it isn't going to matter that you chase one off. Clearly you have some question of trust with this guy who you've been in a relationship with for a year and a half....so something is lacking there. You need to deal with him directly and make it clear how you feel and how he has been treating you. Define exactly what you need from the relationship. If he can't provide that, then maybe this relationship is done.

[Danny]

Michele, A relationship is based on trust. If your unable to get that commitment then there are numerous fish in the sea!

I'm glad I found this site. I really need advice and hope I've come to the right place. I've been dating the same person for a year and a half. I'm 30, he's 22. Lately he is slacking off... not coming here when he says he will... not giving me any affection... just acting like he is the only one who matters. I found a "love" letter in his car last week from a 17(!!) year old who works with him. She said she loved him and would f*ck him anytime, anywhere, anyplace, anyhow. I confronted him and he said it was just a girl that was infatuated with him. I went to his place of work last Thursday (a restaurant) and saw her. Yes, she is still a little girl. She walked up to me and said he was breaking up with me. I told her that she doesnt want to f*ck with me. I now find out that she ran into the back hysterically crying after I left. I was talking to another girl that works there today and she said this girl cries all the time for my boyfriend and only waits for him to come by her so she can hang on him. This makes me wonder what he did or said to her to make her this obsessed with him... or do 17 year olds get like this? I cant remember that far back. He says he's not interested in her... she really is a baby still. But I know how guys will flirt with girls and that worries me. HELP!!!! What am I supposed to do... I could talk to her again and tell her this has gone far enough. I could kill my boyfriend. I love this guy with all my heart and I'm going through alot of problems in my life right now and having him here makes me feel better.

 

Okay... again... HELP!! Please give me advice as this has me in tears most of the day.

 

I wonder if he realizes sleeping with a 17 year old is statutory rape?