nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 My husband told me that he looks at porn. does this mean that he doesn't love me? My husvand is not looking at porn anymore and he's trying to for a long time and he feels terrivle when he does. why can't he stop? does he love me? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 This question gets asked five times a day here. There's no real single answer. I like to look at pictures of naked women...I have no idea. I prefer the real thing. I suppose the pictures are so readily available on the net whereas the real thing would be rather impractical to secure on a volume basis....and if your husband did that I'm sure you would really be pissed off. Your hubby is a red blooded male who is programed genetically to enjoy the female anatomy. I'm sure he loves you more than anything and he means no disrespect. It's just a guy thing. Some guys just like to look at pictures of naked women once in a while, even though they all sort of look the same in many respects...it's just something you never get tired of, kind of like ice cream. Don't take it personally. If this is really affecting your relationship, get the two of you to counselling immediately and get it worked out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 My husvand wants to stop though? why is it hard? he doens't want to look at them does it mean he doesn't love me? he cryed telling me he. My husvand hates porn. Link to post Share on other sites
UCFKevin Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 If you think he watches porn because he doesn't love you, you guys have a lot more problems than just porn. Link to post Share on other sites
priscilla Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 How much time does he spend looking at porn? If his watching porn interferes with him spending time with you, then it is a problem. If it is only once in a while, I wouldn't worry about it. That is good that he is respecting your feelings and trying to stop. Link to post Share on other sites
priscilla Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 You said that he doesn't look at it that much, then don't worry about it. You haven't wasted your time. Most guys look at porn. From an evolutionary point of view, men aren't supposed to be with one woman. However, homo sapiens were given a frontal lobe in which to control those urges. Some fail miserably and cheat. I wouldn't get upset or dwell on this anymore if it is only occassionaly and he is trying to stop. Like I said, if it were interfering with your time together then you can get upset. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 My husvand doesn't want to look at porn. He started lookign at it vefore he knew me and he just can't stop? why? he hates it he knows it hurts me. Link to post Share on other sites
ladyangel Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 Umm...according to your profile you're only 16 years old. Is this some kind of joke? Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 no lol i meant 1978 not 1988 sorry...... Link to post Share on other sites
priscilla Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 If it distresses you both this much and he can't stop even though he wants too, then maybe he needs professional help. That way he can find out why he can't stop. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 My husvand says he can now. He told me and he sees it makes me sad.... wondering why couldn't he though it made him feel sad Link to post Share on other sites
priscilla Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 That is good. Now he has to find the necessary steps to get through this problem. Oops, I mean that is good that he has found the reason why he does it, not that you guys are sad. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 C you know why he couldn't stop vefore though? what is so cddictive? why aren't I good enough? Link to post Share on other sites
priscilla Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 Only he will be able to find out why he couldn't stop before, and that is why he may need a professional. It has absolutely nothing to do with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 You sure it doesn't have anything to with me? does it mean he doen't love me? he's not goign to lok at it again. I don't understand why he keept looking he said he like tried to r atioalise it. I just feel crushed like I'm not good enough or he doens't really love me. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 why aren't I good enough? Did you read Tony's post at all? It is NOT about you. Do you ever look at a movie star? Do you want the movie star more than your husband? Do you ever look at a guy in a magazine? Do you love the guy in the magazine more? NO. It's about wanting to look at an interesting image. That is it. Don't make this into a big thing that it's not. I repeat, it is NOT about you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 You sure it doesn't have anything to with me? does it mean he doen't love me? he's not goign to lok at it again. I don't understand why he keept looking he said he like tried to r atioalise it. I just feel crushed like I'm not good enough or he doens't really love me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 I don't look at movie stars I only look at my husvand why would i want to look at anyone else? I love him more than anything! (exce God) Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 why would i want to look at anyone else Why not? Looking doesn't mean wanting. It's just looking. You walk by men in the street - surely you see them? It is not a sin to look at other humans and that you do doesn't mean you want to have sex with them. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nilocevoli Posted April 4, 2004 Author Share Posted April 4, 2004 yah, not naked guys! c Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted April 4, 2004 Share Posted April 4, 2004 Once again, did you read Tony's post? Link to post Share on other sites
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