worlybear Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 I'll cut to the chase. On discovering I had some bank statements missing that I needed to progress my legal aid application- went to the bank today and discovered that STBXH has cleared the debt and closed the account. I was totally gobsmacked as I was anticipating a furious court battle over the shared debts (about £4,000.) So, I should be laughing and smiling- but I'm not. I feel as flat as a pancake. And I want to know how he's managed to pay off the shared bank loan? He has yet to realise that his CSA payments will be taken from his wage packet as he won't reply to their letters. WTF is going on and why am I feeling so c****y about it ? Still have to go to court to pursue my share of his pension (to help raise our 9 yr old.) I feel gutted. Please help. Link to post Share on other sites
willowthewisp Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 Hi Worly Be sure to tell your solcitor about him paying of the joint loan, seems he has more money than he is letting on huh? Court order for finacial disclosure will sort that out! Try not to worry, I know it is hard but UK courts do everything they can to ensure that a father supports his child to the best of his ability. Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 Because sometimes when you gear up for a fight, all of those hormones etc get in gear and hype you up a bit. You also feel pretty "right" for striking out at said "bad guy." Overgeneralized a bit here. Then they just do something that takes the wind out of the conflict and your body and brain don't need that extra adrenaline etc. anymore, you fall flat. It doesn't "feel" like a victory because the other party threw up the white flag before the battle even started. Don't be so hard on yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
tobydog1 Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 Hi Worly, I can relate to this feeling, it's as if it is another shock to come to terms with. Wondering how he paid it and almost another little bit of closure on his part. Does that make sense? Another bit of disconnection. I wouldn't hold out much hope re the CSA, mine has managed to fool them and we've been awarded zero! Not a penny in 6 months...... Hope you do better than us! Take care, the feeling will pass Debx Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted April 2, 2011 Share Posted April 2, 2011 Worly I think every post above is correct. I also think you are possibly annoyed because yet again he has done something behind your back - it is another form of deception because he says he has no money yet he does this, he also did it without consulting you when it is a joint loan. A continuation of past behaviour on his part. But as you have been recommended, make sure your solicitor knows. If the ex can afford to pay this, he can afford to pay for his child! Link to post Share on other sites
Author worlybear Posted April 2, 2011 Author Share Posted April 2, 2011 Yes, I think you're all right. Have emailed solicitor and I think I'll give the CSA a ring........... Thanks all. Link to post Share on other sites
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