mistake!!

[sadden heart]

It all started in November of 1999 and I met a guy that I just felt in my heart was the right one for me and it was like I knew it instantly!! We dated every once in a while and I couldn't let go! He used me for sex and everything else he wanted but I took it because deep down I felt so deeply for him.Then in May of 2000 we started getting really close and started a relationship we were together until about a week ago. I broke up with him because he started distancing himself from me and wanted to spend all his time with his friends. So now I want him back soo bad but he will not let me in again he keeps brushing me off. How should I take this? It is so hard for me to let go of him! Should I wait or move on with my life??

[Tony T]

Even though you miss him, he probably still has this thing with wanting to be with his friends. That's a young guy thing that can, for some men, last into their early 30's.

 

He doesn't want to resume a relationship with you because for the same reason he was distancing himself and you broke up with him. More than likely, the relationship was getting too close and he doesn't want a very serious relationship right now. Additionally, men do not find it very sexy when women who have dumped them return to ask them back. It is confusing and not an attractive proposition. In general, men are turned off by women who directly and agressively pursue them. Your chances of getting him back, now that he know you want him back, are dramatically increased if you have no further contact with him and let him start wondering what's going on.

 

You are best served by sticking to your guns. When a relationship gets so unsatisfactory that you elect to terminate it, make your decision and don't go back. In the majority of cases, people who get back together for specific reasons find themselves back in the same crap again.

 

Every time you start wanting him back rrreeeaaaalllllll bad, just think of the reasons you broke it off with him and take your mind off the subject. There are lots of guys out there who would be great for you. Heal from this situation, keep yourself busy, and move on to bigger and better things.