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"I will not murder you" dating profile


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This is funny, this is a famous "I will not murder you" dating profile, where the gentleman expresses NUMEROUS times in his profile that he will not "Murder you"

 

 

Though, this is synomous to many of the dating profiles I've seen, and perhaps this thread should be entitled, "Things unnecessarily placed in dating profiles"

 

Things that peopple put in profiles that turn people off, even though it's something that shouldn't bother people?

 

Will they figure, "Oh, okay, he won't murder me, I should go out with him"??

 

And it may not necessarily include that, but other statements made in profiles that aren't necessary that can make the reader's hair stand up on end?

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Intricategirl

Not even close to being as creepy as that- I recently had a guy tell me I was a "sweet piece of meat". My first thought was that I would never let him cook me a steak, because it might be the last girl he dated. My second thought was wondering if that line had ever once got him laid, and the girl who would respond to it. My third thought was that he was probably not the guy I'm looking for, so I'm going to go ahead and let that one get away. With a restraining order if necessary. ;):D

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Well, think about it, if you describe in your profile all the BAD things you WON'T DO to a future mate.....would that attract more people? LOL

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:lmao::lmao::lmao:

Did you read his favorite book list?

 

Haha, his 6 things he can't live without.

 

Ha, can you imagine being a similar user?

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I think the fact that he put that in his profile so many times probably means he IS going to murder you.

 

I mean really...he's probably thinking "well if I say many times that I won't kill them...then they will feel safe...go out with me...and then I will kill them."

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LeaningIntoTheMuse

It's obviously a joke. Probably written by someone with too much time on their hands.

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My prayers have been answered a guy who won't murder me, has a fine collection of meathooks, and makes his own turkey jerky - folks I'm in love. :)

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LeaningIntoTheMuse
My prayers have been answered a guy who won't murder me, has a fine collection of meathooks, and makes his own turkey jerky - folks I'm in love. :)

 

:lmao: LMAO!

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Intricategirl
This guy seems great! Not dying is one of my favorite first date activities.

 

Well, I know I'm looking for it in a long term mate. I think if a guy murdered me on my first date, I wouldn't see him again. Because I've got standards and boundaries, dammit!

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This is funny, this is a famous "I will not murder you" dating profile, where the gentleman expresses NUMEROUS times in his profile that he will not "Murder you"

 

 

Though, this is synomous to many of the dating profiles I've seen, and perhaps this thread should be entitled, "Things unnecessarily placed in dating profiles"

 

Things that peopple put in profiles that turn people off, even though it's something that shouldn't bother people?

 

Will they figure, "Oh, okay, he won't murder me, I should go out with him"??

 

He'd get responses from women who share his brand of humour, I'm sure....though it would be most unfortunate for them if he turned out to be a murderous psychopath with a great sense of humour.

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Mutant Debutante
He'd get responses from women who share his brand of humour, I'm sure....though it would be most unfortunate for them if he turned out to be a murderous psychopath with a great sense of humour.

 

Yep. I think he's pretty amusing and I'd probably even write him, if I was single. Although I'd probably also make sure to meet up with him in a crowded well-lit place, maybe near a police station, just in case.

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Enchanted Girl

LOL!

 

Although I did talk to a man who was almost that obvious on okcupid, back when I was single, who wanted to murder me, I could tell.

 

He was looking for a woman between the ages of 18-99. (Yea, like any man really has that preference unless he's just looking for a victim!) He said he was okay with any kind of girl and didn't want to talk about himself because it would ruin the mystery.

 

He asked to call me and I thought he was just stupid when making his profile, so I gave him my number and decided to give him a chance. He called me a few hours later and I was logged onto the site at the same time. He started messaging me on that site and talking to me on the phone, separately at the same time. And he told me on the phone that I sounded beautiful and that he was falling in love with me already. Didn't ask any personal questions about myself, just complimented me a bunch and did the same on the site. He said he needed to go on a date immediately with me and the same on the site.

 

I said,"You do realize that the person you are messaging online and the person you are talking to on the phone are the same person, right?" Because he was talking to us like we were separate people.

 

And he said,"Whoops. I'm just tired."

 

And I said,"Do you even remember my first name?"

 

And he said,"Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh.....I don't know."

 

Then I hung up the phone and he left threatening messages in my voicemail box. Pretty scary.

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Ruby Slippers

A friend of mine was hanging out with this guy recently at her place, and he was trying to talk his way into her bed. Well, he talked too much. This creep-o actually said to her, "It's not like I'm going to rape you!" :eek:

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curlygirl40

The man doth protest too much, methinks.

 

LOL

 

I know it's fake but it gave me the creeps. :D

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