tattoomytoe Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 why, why, why are people putting up with others in their lifes that cause misery, turmoil, anger, jealousy, inferiority? i mean if they are your parents......i understand why.....but these terrible bf and skanky gf people are fretting over......just do not take their crap anymore! be the bigger person, and STOP THE INSANITY!!!!! i mean really, if you have to ask yourself-or LS- if their behavior is ok, if what was done was abuse or rape, what ever it may be...if you have to ask, then it is more than likely NOt OK with YOU..and that is what matters! Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 Hearts, once attached, don't seem to detach easily. Not exactly sure why people are built that way; it seems counterproductive. Nevertheless, it is what it is. Could be we all spend so many years programmed to want the 'happy ever after' that when we think it's just around the corner, it's very hard to give up the hope that it might still be within reach. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 I TOTALLY agree. I was stuck in a marriage once. I will NEVER be stuck in another relationship. Either I'm happy or I'm the hell OUT! I don't even care if I'm right or wrong. If he's going to cause me aggravation....I can get plenty of that without him. I'd rather be single. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 Originally posted by moimeme Could be we all spend so many years programmed to want the 'happy ever after' that when we think it's just around the corner, it's very hard to give up the hope that it might still be within reach. If I have to reach any further than my beer.....he's too much trouble. HAHA! Link to post Share on other sites
Fedup&givingup Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 EXactly, Tattoo. Further, I found when I was confessing to the public my own story, I knew full well what the score/deal was. It was kind of therapeutic for me to write it. What I think it all boils down to is that these people know what the answer is, they know what's right or wrong for themselves, BUT, they need validation. Link to post Share on other sites
Author tattoomytoe Posted April 5, 2004 Author Share Posted April 5, 2004 let me also say that i do not think any less of anyone who needs our support here, or need to get their story out.....on the contrary it is good to get it out......... but it pisses me off to see so many persons sell themselves short on a jerk-off! Love all my LS'ers! Link to post Share on other sites
Girlie Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 ""Could be we all spend so many years programmed to want the 'happy ever after' that when we think it's just around the corner, it's very hard to give up the hope that it might still be within reach."" I know that's been a problem of mine. I would also add from my experience that it can be just as perplexing to the person putting up with the crap as to why they do as it is to others watching. There can be a lot of somewhat complicated reasons for people putting up with what they do. Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 Originally posted by tattoomytoe ....but these terrible bf and skanky gf people are fretting over......just do not take their crap anymore! be the bigger person, and STOP THE INSANITY!!!!! I am still working on the skanky girlfriends. For a time I was almost ready to accept that I deserved to get cheated on all of the time. I then snapped to my senses after going through a huge ordeal with perhaps the most problematic woman I have ever met. I sat back, reflected, and since then have managed to steer clear of women (and people in general) who are no good for me. It took a lot of bad experiences, but I now have much better luck recognizing red flags, and standing up for myself and what I feel is fair to me. It took a long while to learn that I have a right to be angry in certain situations. I now realize that there are times when it is okay for me not to forgive someone for what they have done, and that my trust should be earned. Link to post Share on other sites
brashgal Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 I think a lot of us mistakenly thought we were doing it 'for the kids'. Little did we know that the kids usually know better and wish we'd stop the madness. Link to post Share on other sites
Fedup&givingup Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 Brash, that's my theory too. Sometimes no example is better than a bad one, in terms of role models/parents and children. Link to post Share on other sites
brashgal Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 Amen to that - this house is practically stress-free now... Link to post Share on other sites
tom_gbr Posted April 5, 2004 Share Posted April 5, 2004 i know what you all mean.....i had the best six months of my life with my now ex - girlfriend. but i put up with a lot of crap. towards the last couple of months she became so distant, also she had terrible temper problems when she was tired and never fully appreciated what i would do for her. she cheated on me as well just over a month into the relationship, which wasnt that bad but she kept in contact with the guy and met him in a club for a chat....when i was in the same ****ing club with her! also after six months of being together she broke up with me on the phone one night...two weeks after we had been to paris for the valentines day weekend...thats bad enough but when she broke up with me on the phone she said that i wasnt aloud to see her for a couple of weeks and never gave me a clear reason why she finished it. to make matters worse im trying no contact but it all ****ed up when she thought it would be a good idea to text me saying that she was missing me...when she knows to well that my feelings for her havent changed at all. she bought me a t-shirt for valentines day in the wrong size and she said that she will return it and get me a new one...i bet i never get it which sucks i suppose i could put most of this down to her age as she was 16 and i was 20.....lesson learnt Link to post Share on other sites
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