Irishlove Posted April 10, 2011 Share Posted April 10, 2011 MM scrolls through till he sees my name and reads what I'm doing? Why bother. He told a friend of mine that 'we were fighting'...ummmmmmmm no. He has no clue I am done. HUGE difference. I can go to sleep tonight knowing he has no clue he can go to you know where. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Irishlove Posted April 10, 2011 Author Share Posted April 10, 2011 He said "it's easier if she hates me". What does that mean? Why does he want me to hate him because I'll get over him easier? It really hurts me he can be so shallow and full of himself that he could care less that he has hurt me to the point I hate him. Link to post Share on other sites
BB07 Posted April 10, 2011 Share Posted April 10, 2011 Even if he is not on your friends list, you can still block him and then he will be prevented from seeing any of your status updates, nor will you be able to see his. You need to do this if you are truly NC. Link to post Share on other sites
JadedAmore Posted April 10, 2011 Share Posted April 10, 2011 Even if he is not on your friends list, you can still block him and then he will be prevented from seeing any of your status updates, nor will you be able to see his. You need to do this if you are truly NC. My thoughts exactly. Blocking him will not allow him to see not just your posts, but comments on mutual friends posts as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Irishlove Posted April 11, 2011 Author Share Posted April 11, 2011 He is blocked but he knew where I was last night. Why does he think me hating him will make it easier? He thought we were just in a fight? omg. I'm so mad. He left me hurt and he knows this. He really has some nerve Link to post Share on other sites
BB07 Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 He is blocked but he knew where I was last night. Why does he think me hating him will make it easier? He thought we were just in a fight? omg. I'm so mad. He left me hurt and he knows this. He really has some nerve No one knows your answers.....I'm sorry. You need to start concentrating on yourself, being good to yourself, doing things you enjoy, get the focus off of him. Stop obsessing about why he does what he does, you don't know and truthfully you will never know. Just take care of you. Block him on FB, tell your friends to not update you on what he says or what he does. It's the only way..........out. Link to post Share on other sites
Flabbergaster Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 He said "it's easier if she hates me". What does that mean? hey, a question that xMM can answer, easily. It could mean that he cares for you...just not enough to leave his wife, maybe not enough to even consider it. If you hate him, then he can think of you recovering from this and forgive himself a little bit. Cyberstalking you...that could mean he's trying to keep you in his life, somehow. That he isn't ready to let go and forget you. Cause he misses you. Bottom line:agree that you need to block him, tell your friends not to talk about you to him. Ignore his attempts to contact, block his email addresses, CONTINUE to be mad at him, and move on with NC. Even if he cares about you, the pain he can offer isn't enough. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Irishlove Posted April 11, 2011 Author Share Posted April 11, 2011 hey, a question that xMM can answer, easily. It could mean that he cares for you...just not enough to leave his wife, maybe not enough to even consider it. If you hate him, then he can think of you recovering from this and forgive himself a little bit. Cyberstalking you...that could mean he's trying to keep you in his life, somehow. That he isn't ready to let go and forget you. Cause he misses you. Bottom line:agree that you need to block him, tell your friends not to talk about you to him. Ignore his attempts to contact, block his email addresses, CONTINUE to be mad at him, and move on with NC. Even if he cares about you, the pain he can offer isn't enough. True, thank you. Thank you all. xo Link to post Share on other sites
26pointblue Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 He said "it's easier if she hates me". What does that mean? Why does he want me to hate him because I'll get over him easier? It really hurts me he can be so shallow and full of himself that he could care less that he has hurt me to the point I hate him. I know this is ironic, but my MM has said these exact same words about his wife. He thinks it will be easier on her & him if he does things to let her get to the point of hating him. But that doesn't work - it backfires because she is really hurt but still loves him, & I bet she has these same thoughts you're having, about how he can care so little as to do that to her. I think most MMs are cowardly. Mine sure is in many ways, including this one. So just remember who you are dealing with & don't expect him to be up front or brave about things because he obviously hasn't been for awhile now. If I were you I would just delete my facebook account. Is it really worth it? If I leave MM it will be for my final time ever, & I will take every measure to get rid of him. Change my number, or block his texts & calls, tell my receptionist not to put any calls from him through, etc. Yeah, he will still have ways to contact me if he wants - he still knows my direct line at work & where I live & my email address which isn't very easy to change without losing all of the other emails I really want to get, but, it will just make me feel good knowing I'm being proactive in keeping him out of my life, & that there's no chance I'll go back with him. He's not on facebook but if he were I would block him & delete any mutual friends, or, if that wasn't possible I'd just delete my acocunt if necessary. I think it would actually feel good. I think that is just the point I'm at though - right now trying everything to hang in there & help us work out, but, if we don't, I will do the opposite & get the heck out of dodge & make sure there's no way I can go back. I do realize people are different, & your way may not be mine. I just wanted to let you know what I plan to do if I have to break it off with him. I am getting my ducks in a row for that in the event that either he breaks it off with me or I have to break it off with him. [He is separated, not by his choice, & doing a back & forth dance.] Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Irishlove Posted April 12, 2011 Author Share Posted April 12, 2011 I'm not going as far as deleting my fb account. He is blocked from it. It's his loss not mine. I loved him as much as I could and treated him with respect. I don't lose, he does. What he said about his wife I believe. Let him stay stuck with her. She will never trust him and he will never stop thinking about me. I'll move on. Link to post Share on other sites
carrie999 Posted April 12, 2011 Share Posted April 12, 2011 MM scrolls through till he sees my name and reads what I'm doing? Why bother. He told a friend of mine that 'we were fighting'...ummmmmmmm no. He has no clue I am done. HUGE difference. I can go to sleep tonight knowing he has no clue he can go to you know where. I haven't read through this thread, but step #1: BLOCK him. He won't be able to see anything involving you via Facebook, period. Step #2 (if you're really serious about your privacy): "unfriend" every mutual friend you have. Anyone who cares enough will ask why you did so, and that will give you the chance to explain that you don't want him to be privy to anything going on in YOUR life through any mutual friends. That's the only way to essentially guarantee he cannot see your Facebook page. If you have no mutual friends and he's blocked, and your privacy settings are ALL set to "friends only," the only way he can know anything is if you have other "non-FB" friends giving him info, or if he's figured out your passwords or hacked into your account. Link to post Share on other sites
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