USCGAviator Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 Just looking for some outside perspectives on this. I'll try to explain this a simple as possible. My ex lives about 6 hours from me (temporary) and unfortunately this only gives me 1 weekend a month with my kids 8,6, and 3. During my weekends with the kids everything is great and of course I'm an awesome father. So I'm starting to notice this trend, and its only on Sundays which is the day I take them back to mothers. Keep in mind they love their mom to death, and she is a great mother. My 3yr old will gag and complain of his stomach hurting all morning:sick:. My 6yr old will do this as well:sick:. My 8yr old says they never do this any other time. I'm not trying to poison my kids so my only other thought is that its something psychological. Thoughts? Link to post Share on other sites
florence of suburbia Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 The simplest answer is they're craving more attention from you and they think if they are sick, they will get it. Whether they're working themselves into a state or just pretending, hard to say... Is there any way you can see them more? Can your ex-wife meet you half way? Link to post Share on other sites
Author USCGAviator Posted April 11, 2011 Author Share Posted April 11, 2011 We do meet halfway and she plans to move much closer this summer. My job also makes it difficult to pull a 3 day weekend more than once a month. My youngest woke up crying in the morning and gagged and vomited a little phlegm. He's 3 and every 15 min or so would cry and complain that his "tummy" hurt. My 6yr old complains too while were on the road and will cry a little about it. This is definitely a spot on monthly occurrence, and is the only reason I'm thinking some sort of anxiety. Thanks for the post I think they are craving more attention. Knowing that breaks my heart cause my time is limited right now. Link to post Share on other sites
threebyfate Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 The other possibility is that they get motion sickness and are anticipating the long drive home. Link to post Share on other sites
blizzard Posted April 11, 2011 Share Posted April 11, 2011 Does this ever happen with your exwife? Do the kids get this same stomach ache? Poor kids. Change and having a family divided isn't easy...and it isn't fair to them. But I understand, things happen... Smother them with attention. Love them. Sacrifice time from work somehow. Make it work. It's not their fault that you aren't there. They simply love you and miss you . Best wishes. Link to post Share on other sites
Author USCGAviator Posted April 11, 2011 Author Share Posted April 11, 2011 No it never happens anytime with my Ex. Also it never happens on the drive to my place. It's only the morning of going back to moms and it starts way before we hit the road. so that rules out motion sickness. Otherwise they are very happy and healthy kids. I get them for a week in Jun so I'll see if it happens after a weeks visit. Link to post Share on other sites
PollyIvy Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 One of my kids gets tummy aches whenever he's nervous. If he's really stressed out or overwhelmed, he can get himself a fever - with no other symptoms. It just means he needs to stay home and have me all to himself, and have 'quiet time'. Your poor kids are nervous. They love their parents so much. You are the one that is not at home anymore, so it makes sense that they have more anxiety concerning where they stand with you. I'm so sorry for all of you. That is wonderful that your ex will move closer to you, although that means yet another stressful change for the kids. It sounds like you're being patient and understanding with them. Maybe ask if they have any questions. Sometimes it is unbelievable, the ideas kids have in their heads about things. Link to post Share on other sites
Irishlove Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 My son did this when he would get nervous. My best advice is to call thier pediatrician. They may not have the coping skills they need when they are to get ready to go home. You might have to find a fun ritual. Plus they may feel your stress. You could even try this. Get icy pops and right before you prepare them to go you tell them they have to take thier happy pops and this will make it so their tummies don't hurt when it's time to go because the happy pops are full of love and it will last until the next weekend. SOmetimes just putting it in their heads will work. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Irishlove Posted April 27, 2011 Share Posted April 27, 2011 No it never happens anytime with my Ex. Also it never happens on the drive to my place. It's only the morning of going back to moms and it starts way before we hit the road. so that rules out motion sickness. Otherwise they are very happy and healthy kids. I get them for a week in Jun so I'll see if it happens after a weeks visit. I was only nervous leaving my father when I was younger. I don't know why. I guess I was afraid he would forget about me or one day he may never come back. Who knows I was little. Plus I had a step sister and one day my dad didn't come back and he did raise my step sister as his own. Link to post Share on other sites
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