My Daily "No Contact" Journey Journal

[MrStinky]

Day Thirty One

 

Today was an AWESOME day!

 

Woke up, went to work and had a date after work!

 

Well, work went by really quickly and the date wasn't for 1.5 hours after I was done so I stuck around the building to chat with some coworkers.

 

Well, since I started reading about the PUA stuff - I have seen many opportunities to use the stuff.

 

Well, I used it alot yesterday!

 

First, there is a girl who works in the building and I went up to talk to her about something (I am a supervisor) related to my coworkers actions.

 

When I got up there, I got down to business right away with the work related situation but then started to flirt with her for a good 15 minutes.

 

When I said I had to go she seemed t.o'd that I was leaving but you always want to leave them wanting more

 

Then I was at the front desk of the building talking to a guy and he was saying that she was interested in me.

 

Score 1!

Then there was a couple girls who were coming in the building and had never seen me in my street clothing and we got to chatting/flirting and one of them told me I need to come play some "drinking games" with her.

 

A coworker told me she has never talked to anybody like this before in the building... except for me.

Score 2!

 

Then I went on my date.

 

It was great and was sealed with a kiss at the end.

 

Score 3!

 

Then I came back to the building to pick up my stuff (it is a condominium) and a girl I see every morning was at the desk talking.

 

I walked in like I owned the place and she looked me up and down and had the biggest smile on her face.

 

She said I looked "soooo different" in my street clothes and you could tell she liked what she say.

 

Man - losing 75 pounds and dressing so much better is literally doing wonders for me.

 

In the last 48 hours, I have had 2 guys tell me that I am "good looking" and at least 6 girls have shown major interest in me.

 

This just goes to show, when you take care of yourself after a breakup, there is so much to gain!

 

I don't come here to boast, but rather to show you what a sloppy slob like me has been able to do after a breakup.

 

If I can do it....

 

ANYBODY CAN DO IT!!!

 

Today was...

 

...a massive success!

[Sassygirl2]

Awesome news about your day! When you are feeling good about yourself it definitely is a turn on for the opposite sex. They say that we are attracted to people with confidence and that is so true. Congrats to you on the success with the ladies!

[Delilah5]

seems like your doing GREAT

i'm going thru a breakup now. and need help

my only bad habit is texting!!!

how do i stop texting him?

please help i feel like a fool sometimes.

any other pointers will help too.

thanks

Turn your phone off and toss it into the bottom of your purse. Stop texting him. Cold turkey. You're not a fool. I'm going through one too. It's not as hard as you might think to incorporate the NO CONTACT rule. That's the best way to start to get over it. I know that you probably have memories floating around in your brain and your heart is oozing with pain. Me, too. My boyfriend simply stopped calling me. Cold. Dead. Stop. He's a thoughtless coward with no empathy for another human being. But it doesn't take anything away from me. I'm not a coward and I don't need him to live. Period. For the first couple of days, I cried hard. It sucked big time. Now it's been a whole seven days and baby, I'm not crying now. It's his loss and my gain. I have my self respect. I have many men asking me out and I won't be alone for long. I haven't called him, texted him, or e-mailed him. I don't need him. You don't need the other one either. It's just like quitting smoking. The first day is God-awful, but you get through it. The second day is worse. Then you start to notice after the third, fourth, fifth, etc. It gets a bit easier and easier. You will get over it. You just have to LET IT GO and you will meet someone else who will love you no matter what. But you have to let yourself. It's just that simple. Hope the time goes by fast and I wish you the best darlin'. You'll be ok soon. Guess where my phone is? The bottom of my purse, silent as a tomb. Out of sight and soon, out of mind.:D:D:D:D:D

[MrStinky]

Awesome news about your day! When you are feeling good about yourself it definitely is a turn on for the opposite sex. They say that we are attracted to people with confidence and that is so true. Congrats to you on the success with the ladies!

 

Thank You!

[MrStinky]

Day Thirty Two

 

Today was a good day.

 

Not much went on.

 

Woke up around 9am and watched some TV.

 

Ate some food later and cooked a whole bunch for the week.

 

Then around 11am I went to a friends house and we watched a movie.

 

Then in the mid afternoon I went up to the drug store to purchase some products.

 

After that I came home to more TV and to hang out with my brother.

 

I was quite tired by the end of the day and was asleep before 10:30pm.

 

Today was...

 

...a nice, easy going, laid back success!

[silvermane187]

I admire your positive attitude.

[Sassygirl2]

Hi Mr. S.. I had a pretty good day too. Went to my daughter's soccer game (they won 5-1), had lunch with my mom and did a little shopping with her at Macy's. Then went home and did some laundry, cleaned house, etc. Then my other daughter came over at 6pm and we went to see a really cute movie called, "Prom". It was definitely a feel good Disney movie. On the way home from the mall, my daughter said some things to me in the car that kind of freaked me out.

 

She said that she knew things were bad and weren't going to work out with my exbf. She said she gets these feelings about stuff and she had a bad feeling about him. She also said that the only reason he is on a dating website now is because he misses me. She said he needs a companion and that is why he's looking again so soon. But it's not going to be me. I started crying because she was so serious about it.

 

I can remember when she was 5 years old and she asked me in the car "are you and Dad going to get a divorce?" She knew before he and I even did. It freaked me out. I think kids are much more perceptive than we know.

 

I feel like I should have listened to her a long time ago. Both of my girls never warmed up to my ex. They just tolerated him.

[MrStinky]

Hi Mr. S.. I had a pretty good day too. Went to my daughter's soccer game (they won 5-1), had lunch with my mom and did a little shopping with her at Macy's. Then went home and did some laundry, cleaned house, etc. Then my other daughter came over at 6pm and we went to see a really cute movie called, "Prom". It was definitely a feel good Disney movie. On the way home from the mall, my daughter said some things to me in the car that kind of freaked me out.

 

She said that she knew things were bad and weren't going to work out with my exbf. She said she gets these feelings about stuff and she had a bad feeling about him. She also said that the only reason he is on a dating website now is because he misses me. She said he needs a companion and that is why he's looking again so soon. But it's not going to be me. I started crying because she was so serious about it.

 

I can remember when she was 5 years old and she asked me in the car "are you and Dad going to get a divorce?" She knew before he and I even did. It freaked me out. I think kids are much more perceptive than we know.

 

I feel like I should have listened to her a long time ago. Both of my girls never warmed up to my ex. They just tolerated him.

 

It's awesome that you're keeping busy. Keep that up and the days will fly by. You'll also be healing simultaneously!

 

It's never not ok to cry. I cried alot within the first week it happened but after that you become more stoic and your resiliency starts to shine through.

 

Also, isn't it amazing how so many "opinions" about the ex come out after the break up? I have had sooo many people (friends, family, siblings, cousins, etc) say that I am better off without her, she was not good enough for me, she was ugly , etc. etc. etc

 

They may say this because it is true -or- they are trying to make you feel better.

 

Either way, it can be nice to hear!

 

I am sure he misses your company and is looking to replace that ASAP.

 

But he made his bed, now he can sleep in at... ALONE!

 

Kids are super perceptive.

 

It's good to hear from other people who they felt about him. It will help you heal. It worked for me

[MrStinky]

I admire your positive attitude.

 

Thank You!

[Sassygirl2]

It's Sunday evening which was "our" day and night. We used to make dinner at home and watch TV together. I miss that. I am trying to get used to spending my evenings alone if I don't have my kids. Sure, I can go out with friends, but I still have to come home to an empty apartment. Kinda sucks. I wonder if I will ever meet anyone who I feel so comfortable with again? I guess the answer is yes, but at this time I don't see it happening. I have had several relationships in the 5 years since my divorce. I think it's time to take care of myself. I have always jumped right into another relationship within months of the old one ending. I ended 2 out of the 5 of them. This time I need to work on my self-esteem and how I treat men.

 

I am tempted to delete my facebook page. I just keep checking his page to see if he has deleted me or any of the comments I wrote in the past year on his page. He hasn't (which is weird) but I feel this urge to check every day and it drives me crazy. Maybe if I just delete the whole thing for awhile. I don't know. It seems like a waste of time to me sometimes but then again, it is fun to keep up with everyone from high school and work.

 

What do you think? How was your day/weekend??

[MrStinky]

Day Thirty Three

 

Today was a good day.

 

Got up later than usual (around 11am).

 

Just hung around the house until I decided I wanted to go for a walk.

 

Off to the beach I went.

 

Well, on the way down I ran into a friend of mine and we decided to go for a long stroll together.

 

Then he was hungry so we stopped for some pizza.

 

After that it was getting late and I had made plans with another friend to hang out.

 

So after I got home and ate something I called my other friend and he came and picked me up.

 

When we got to his house we watched the first game between the Bulls and the Heat.

 

We exchanged stories, tips and techniques with girls.

 

He is a former fat guy who NO girl liked in high school and after he left school he became quite suave and good with the ladies as he lost a whole bunch of fat and got really into fitness.

 

It's interesting to pick his brain.

 

Well, it was about 10pm and I was getting really tired so I came home and got ready for work and hoped into bed.

 

Today was...

 

...a success!

[MrStinky]

Day Thirty Four

 

Today was awesome!

 

I think I'm in love!

 

It started out as usual.

 

Get up, Work till 3 and then go to the gym.

 

Well yesterday and did the above but had to go talk to an employee at the building I work at.

 

Well, I saw a girl there who I think I love

 

We chatted for over an hour and I got her cell number.

 

It was on a cloud on the subway ride home!

 

Got to the gym and killed it in there.

 

My lifts have gone up even though I took a week off!

 

Then I came home, ate and watched some TV with my brothers.

 

I think I am going to ease myself back into the bike workouts as:

 

1) It is supposed to rain all week

2) I need some supplements for my joints

3) I don't want to re-injure my back doe to over training.

 

All in all though, yesterday had me smiling from ear to ear and literally dancing on the subway.

 

I love this girl!

 

Today was...

 

...an awesome success!

[MrStinky]

It's Sunday evening which was "our" day and night. We used to make dinner at home and watch TV together. I miss that. I am trying to get used to spending my evenings alone if I don't have my kids. Sure, I can go out with friends, but I still have to come home to an empty apartment. Kinda sucks. I wonder if I will ever meet anyone who I feel so comfortable with again? I guess the answer is yes, but at this time I don't see it happening. I have had several relationships in the 5 years since my divorce. I think it's time to take care of myself. I have always jumped right into another relationship within months of the old one ending. I ended 2 out of the 5 of them. This time I need to work on my self-esteem and how I treat men.

 

I am tempted to delete my facebook page. I just keep checking his page to see if he has deleted me or any of the comments I wrote in the past year on his page. He hasn't (which is weird) but I feel this urge to check every day and it drives me crazy. Maybe if I just delete the whole thing for awhile. I don't know. It seems like a waste of time to me sometimes but then again, it is fun to keep up with everyone from high school and work.

 

What do you think? How was your day/weekend??

 

I guarantee you will meet someone who is better in all ways.

 

Take care of yourself and you will be much better to take care of others!

 

I think you should delete him from Facebook. It is an awesome medium and he doesn't deserve to see what is going on in your improving life!

[MrStinky]

Day Thirty Five

 

Today was a good, all around day.

 

I woke up to a dream that I was in an alarm clock competition and I was winning. Weird, I know!

 

Got up and went to work for 7am.

 

Work was good and afterwards I stayed behind for a bit to chat with that new girl I seem to be currently loving.

 

I feel I may be showing too much interest and want to tone it down.

 

Employ a little "cat string theory" + some "push-pull."

 

I asked her out for a date next week and once we figure out her schedule, we'll set a date.

 

After that I went to the gym for an upper body workout.

 

It was awesome.

 

Then off to my buddy's house.

 

Once I got there we decided to go to the grocery store.

 

Got some delicious food for the week.

 

Then I came home. Ate some food and hoped on here.

 

I haven't been thinking about her at all because my mind is consumed with the new girl.

 

I have no idea what will come of it but regardless, it is nice to feel love again (even if it is in it's embryonic stages).

 

This journey after the breakup has been both a huge growing experience -and- a huge learning experience.

 

I am so happy these days.

 

I see such a bright future.

 

I can't wait to see what my life holds.

 

And who wants to hold me

 

Today was...

 

...a success!

[MrStinky]

Day Thirty Six

 

Short and sweet.

 

Woke up, went to work and then after work decided to pick up some more clothing for my new style/wardrobe.

 

Got some good stuff.

 

Then I went to the gym and did an extreme lower body workout.

 

It was awesome.

 

Then I came home and found out the girl I "love" has added me on Facebook.

 

SWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!

 

I eat some food and watch some TV with my brother.

 

I then call up a friend I was supposed to hang out with.

 

I go to his house to see him but he is more interested in watching "The Big Bang Theory" than going for a walk

 

I've known him since I was 3 or 4 years old so I can (and did) tell him I'm leaving and that I will call him tomorrow.

 

I get home, watch some more TV.

 

Then my brother wants to go for a walk.

 

So we do.

 

When I get home, I have a bath and get ready for bed.

 

This morning my male Boston Terrier's snoring woke me up before the alarm clock.

 

Regardless, today was...

 

...a success!