CosmoGirl1391 Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 I am a big fan of MTV's "The Real World", and in tonight's episode, one of the female characters, Frankie, was upset about a fight she had with her boyfriend and went in the bathroom and cut herself with a kitchen knife. She said she had been doing it since she was 13. In a movie I watched called "Thirteen", a 13 year old girl cuts herself as well. Is self-mutilation really this common? I mean, I know it's out there. I have seen young girls come in the clinic with unexplained scars and cuts, but I don't see it all that much. I just don't really understand how people can do this to themselves. It such a horrible way of dealing with emotional distress. It's really sad. Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Self mutilation and other forms of self infliction are extremely common. I have ran into a few people who thought it was actually trendy, or cool, to do this. Link to post Share on other sites
zanna Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 I'd say 3 out 4 girls I know have cut themselves. I dont know of any guys who have done this. I too was a cutter but am glad to say that I have stopped. If you want reasons for cutting or how to persuade someone to stop feel free to ask. I'm happy to say I have lead all but one of my cutter friends to stopping and helping them deal with pain in other ways. Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Originally posted by zanna I'd say 3 out 4 girls I know have cut themselves. I dont know of any guys who have done this. I did some googling, and the consensus is that 1% of the population acts out on themselves through pyhsical self-mutilation, most of the cases being girls. Link to post Share on other sites
zanna Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 googling - thats a fun a word. 1% is that all? It must be more common in teenagers. I wonder what the percentage of people who have cut at least once in their life owuld be. I'd assume the percentage to be much higher. In my Life Skills class, our teacher said cutting was more common in the middle to upper class. Do you know why this is? Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Originally posted by zanna In my Life Skills class, our teacher said cutting was more common in the middle to upper class. Do you know why this is? (Pure, unsupported speculation) Perhaps it's a more private form of acting out, in that you can take release from life by yourself, whereas the poorer class of people would resort to drugs, sex, and other forms of acting out. I keep coming up with 1%, the prime demographic being females, aged 11-17. Another factoid, more females attempt suicide, more males actually do it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CosmoGirl1391 Posted April 7, 2004 Author Share Posted April 7, 2004 Well here's what I think about it: And this is just my opinion, no resources to site. I think that people who resort to cutting themselves are very severly emotionally distress. Maybe even to the point of mental disorders. I think that they can't pinpoint what is causing thier emotional pain, they know they are hurting, but can't pinpoint exactly what is causing it and just feel out of control. When they cut themselves, they are in control of their pain. They can look at that cut and say "Ok, that is what is hurting me...I am in pain and it's because of this cut". The physical pain takes away from the emotional pain. I have never known anyone that cuts themselves, personally, only the clients I see in the clinic, which is very few. Perhaps it's a more private form of acting out, in that you can take release from life by yourself, whereas the poorer class of people would resort to drugs, sex, and other forms of acting out. I don't think it's mainly the poorer class that resort to drugs, sex and alcohol because there are so many middle and upper class teens that get more into that stuff than lower class. It's just that the middle and upper class can hide it better. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Maybe it comes down to what the 'distress' is caused by. If a female links all her personal failures to what she "looks like" .....perhaps that would be why she hates her appearance enough to injure it....maybe trying to kill it in a subconscious way. I don't relate to that....and you may not either. But I think that may be the foundational problem. I can't even IMAGINE a person having to live with an image they don't think is special. The worst part being.....those who they perceive to have a wonderful image......have equal problems. Life isn't about looks.....life is just life for everyone regardless. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CosmoGirl1391 Posted April 7, 2004 Author Share Posted April 7, 2004 I don't think that all self-mutilators are suicidal. yeah, it could eventually come to that, but I don't think it's about wanting to kill themselves. I think they just feel so out of control and are in so much emotional pain, that they just crave to be in control again. So they cut themselves as a way to control their pain. It's the same thing with anorexics and bulemics. They feel out of control, and the one thing they can control is what they put into their mouths. All of these have to do with mental disorders and all are serious enough to require counseling. It's really sad. Link to post Share on other sites
jenny Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 interesting thread - i've also heard that sometimes these girls turn their anger inward, because they do not feel free to express it outwardly - that way they also have control of their anger too. i knew a girl in high school who did this, and apparently (this is second-hand) she saw it as a form of self-medication...the wound made her anger concrete and manageable. cuts heal, while break-ups may not, i think is the idea. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabess Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Ahhh Jenny.....Guess I had a shallow opinion of the whole issue. I always assumed it was some inner hate of the outer appearance YOUR explanation makes much more sense though. It's an area I'm limited on. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 One factor common to most people who self-injure, whether they were abused or not, is invalidation. They were taught at any early age that their interpretations of and feelings about the things around them were bad and wrong. http://www.focusas.com/SelfInjury.html Link to post Share on other sites
dyermaker Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Originally posted by jenny i knew a girl in high school who did this, and apparently (this is second-hand) she saw it as a form of self-medication...the wound made her anger concrete and manageable. cuts heal, while break-ups may not, i think is the idea. Yes, that's exactly what a girl close to me told me. The adrenaline, and the focus on the pain, actually diverts the body from the motional pain. She has control over the bleeding, she can stop the wound, whereas the emotional gashes never go away. She's also threatened suicide, and Cosmo, I think you're right, these aren't people always suicidal, it's more a cry for help. Suicides often fail for a reason. Originally posted by Arabess I always assumed it was some inner hate of the outer appearance I also turned up links on those who mutilate themselves for that reason. I guess there's many things behind it, it's like pinpointing the cause for any form of dangerously acting out, there are multiple things beneath the surface. Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Originally posted by moimeme One factor common to most people who self-injure, whether they were abused or not, is invalidation. They were taught at any early age that their interpretations of and feelings about the things around them were bad and wrong. http://www.focusas.com/SelfInjury.html Definitely true. I used to be a big self mutilator, and that pretty much hits the nail right on the head. Link to post Share on other sites
DerangedAngel Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 I used to be a self mutilator as well. I agree with faux that the above does 'hit the nail on the head'. It's the same thing with anorexics and bulemics. They feel out of control, and the one thing they can control is what they put into their mouths. I was anorexic, as well. For some reason, I always took offense to people trying to talk about it. I don't think anyone that hasn't experienced it can explain it, generalize it. I had a terrible time with it. Still do. And it's about more than just control, really. But perhaps that is a start. Back to topic: I never really thought cutting to be all that common. Not nearly as common as eating disorders. Link to post Share on other sites
DerangedAngel Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Actually, guys. Here's what I don't get. Narcisistic b*tches. Stupid narcisistic b*tches that feel out of control, and the one thing they can control is what a stupid narcisistic b*tch they are! I think that's serious enough to require counseling as well. I have ran into a few people who thought it was actually trendy, or cool, to do this. Same with this form of self mutilation. Pity, though, it's not really limited to one's self. Link to post Share on other sites
DerangedAngel Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Also, what I don't get is how someone could make the same typo like thrice and only realize it when their 20 minute shot at fixing it is up. Here... have some SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS's. Link to post Share on other sites
pav186 Posted April 11, 2004 Share Posted April 11, 2004 Originally posted by CosmoGirl1391 I think that people who resort to cutting themselves are very severly emotionally distress. Maybe even to the point of mental disorders. Well, i think it goes without saying that this is certainly the case. I think that they can't pinpoint what is causing thier emotional pain, they know they are hurting, but can't pinpoint exactly what is causing it and just feel out of control. When they cut themselves, they are in control of their pain. They can look at that cut and say "Ok, that is what is hurting me...I am in pain and it's because of this cut". The physical pain takes away from the emotional pain. I think whether or not they pinpoint it is irrelevant. I know people who have cut themselves, some were generally depressed while others did it over certain events I don't think it's mainly the poorer class that resort to drugs, sex and alcohol because there are so many middle and upper class teens that get more into that stuff than lower class. It's just that the middle and upper class can hide it better. I agree on the drug statements but there could be a socio-economic reason as to why one group may cut while the other doesnt. Link to post Share on other sites
faux Posted April 11, 2004 Share Posted April 11, 2004 Originally posted by CosmoGirl1391 I am a big fan of MTV's "The Real World", and in tonight's episode, one of the female characters, Frankie, was upset about a fight she had with her boyfriend and went in the bathroom and cut herself with a kitchen knife. She said she had been doing it since she was 13... I saw a rerun of said episode. I found it quite difficult to watch the entire thing through, as I tend to dislike these types of shows. I just wanted to add that I find it so sad that the minute they knew she had cut herself, no one called the police and an ambulance to forcefully admit her to an inpatient mental hospital. I'm thinking that this girl signed away her abilities to hold MTV liable for this blunder, which also isn't quite right in my opinion. This girl obviously needs some help. I'm just going to be sick if MTV cannot be held liable for not stepping in on this. I don't know her, but from how she presents herself on the television show I can tell she has quite a few issues going on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CosmoGirl1391 Posted April 11, 2004 Author Share Posted April 11, 2004 Originally posted by faux I saw a rerun of said episode. I found it quite difficult to watch the entire thing through, as I tend to dislike these types of shows. I just wanted to add that I find it so sad that the minute they knew she had cut herself, no one called the police and an ambulance to forcefully admit her to an inpatient mental hospital. I'm thinking that this girl signed away her abilities to hold MTV liable for this blunder, which also isn't quite right in my opinion. This girl obviously needs some help. I'm just going to be sick if MTV cannot be held liable for not stepping in on this. I don't know her, but from how she presents herself on the television show I can tell she has quite a few issues going on. Well, if you had watched the show the whole way through, you would have seen where at the end, she goes to visit a counselor to talk about getting help for her problem. And before the show even started, an MTV producer, or somebody, came on and said that the show dealt with an all-too-common problem, etc, etc and gave information and numbers to call if you or someone you know needed help because of this problem. So since they did that, and since she did go and seek help at the end of the show, I think it was ok that it was on a reality show. I mean, hell, it's reality - for a lot of people. Link to post Share on other sites
Odie Posted April 28, 2004 Share Posted April 28, 2004 Well , im 14 and I recentley found out ma gurlfriend was a cuutter. The **** is common , actually like 3 of her friends were , but they were jsut following her trying to be ool , she sereousley had a problem. I got her sum help by getting her to goto the counciler , and a kickass way to stop cutting ureself but make it feel like u are is to use a rubber band , put it atround ure arm and pull it and let it snap u. Sence then she aint cut herself sence she saw the counciler. Wich was allmost 2 weeks now. That is alot saying she would cit herself liek every day , every other day , so yea im happy fer her and i might be 14 but I like love her , and care so yea. Jsut telling u it is common and there is a good way to stop it if u or sum 1 u kno is doing it Link to post Share on other sites
begentle Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 I do think that cutting is as common as ppl think I have a g/f that used to cut herself and I know lots of kids at school that have done it for the fun of it. I have I'll admit that I know I shouldn't of cause I'll always have those scars yes but it is common with cutting the in the state of maine the leading cause of death is suicide which is where I live so yes cutting is very serious and shouldn't be taken litely. Cutting does mean you are very depresed yes but it doesn't mean your mentaly ill I have freinds at school that do it for the hell of it and other ppl at school that also do it for the hell of it so no its not because of a mental problem I think but thats my opinion. Cutting is very serious though. Link to post Share on other sites
dudesomewhere Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 man, these posts get to me so badly... Yeah, it's common because of some ailments, afflictions or disorders associated with them. And if you've seen some of my posts...it's about bi-polar, bpd and others. In my life it's a girl I love very dearly a very good friend almost like a sister. She's cut herself because of crap that she's experienced. No not some lame yuppy angst but things like rape and betrayal. That **** gets to me and yeah I don't usually cuz but ****...I hope that's censored on your end. Trauma like that pushes ppl into those states where they then suffer from those conditions. ****in rape bastard a**h*** ****s Link to post Share on other sites
shortbus74 Posted May 26, 2004 Share Posted May 26, 2004 Yes, self-mutilation is pretty common. People who do cut themself do it because they do not know how to vent their feeling the "proper way". It is easier to hurt yourself than to hurt someone else. For some, it is the easiest way to ease their pain... Link to post Share on other sites
jenden Posted June 11, 2004 Share Posted June 11, 2004 My sister was a cutter. I don't think people cut themselves for no reason, or just because they 'feel blue'. In my experience, there are reasons for doing so. They don't feel in control of their life, and are trying to find a way that they can feel in control. By cutting, they are hurting themselves, by choice, instead of someone else hurting them, which is something they can't control. My sister and I went through a very abusive and emotional childhood, cutting made her feel better, because she felt in control. That was all there was to it. I didn't approve it, but a least she didn't turn to drinking or drugs. She had started doing it after I moved out, and wasn't there for her 24/7 like I had been. I was finally able to help her stop, just by explaining that I was there for her. No matter what, and then demonstrating that to be true. Link to post Share on other sites
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