Gifts from Studmuffin

[jthorne]

Shhhh! :oDon't tell my mommy.

Well! Then I must in good conscience warn you against getting one re: board police. If you read another thread, there are rumors about the board's impending demise, ya know.

[Spark1111]

I was thinking about gifts recently and there have been so many changes, all of which have been wonderful.

 

Seriously, the best gift I ever received from my H was when he flew our youngest son (MY BABY!) home from college for Mother's Day as a surprise.

 

As we were about to sit down to a dinner my H prepared, he got my son on speaker phone as he toasted me.

 

My son said he wished he could be there with me and the family, then he walked down the steps from the bedroom he had been hiding in and appeared at the table.

 

I wept in front of all. It was so thoughtful. I still think about it.:bunny:

[herenow]

I was thinking about gifts recently and there have been so many changes, all of which have been wonderful.

 

Seriously, the best gift I ever received from my H was when he flew our youngest son (MY BABY!) home from college for Mother's Day as a surprise.

 

As we were about to sit down to a dinner my H prepared, he got my son on speaker phone as he toasted me.

 

My son said he wished he could be there with me and the family, then he walked down the steps from the bedroom he had been hiding in and appeared at the table.

 

I wept in front of all. It was so thoughtful. I still think about it.:bunny:

 

That is indeed a wonderful gift.

 

Personally, I think this thread has been exactly what the OP asked for. But, based on her last post I'm thinking she does not agree. Daisy, what did you expect when you started this thread?

 

Seems to me you very quickly started calling people "bitter". Just to let you know, most of us "bitter" BW's are not offended by that word. We can see that it is used when someone wants to shut us down. Why is that? Why do you want to shut us down? What is it about what BW's have to say that upsets you so much that you have to start the name calling?

 

If what I am is "bitter", then call me bitter and proud of it.

[herenow]

NO WONDER this place sucks it so hard!

 

If I say I'm HAPPY, then I'm really not.

If I ask that this SUPPORT FORUM FOR OTHER WOMEN be what it actually says it is, then I'm protesting too much.

 

Don't you people have anything better to do than sling mud?

 

OK, your happy. I'm happy for you (as I have already said in a previous post). What kind of support are you looking for?

 

BTW, I posted about what "gifts" make me happy. Are you happy for me? Or, do I not deserve to be happy because I'm married to my husband?

 

Most of the posters here have acknowledged your happiness, but you have not said anything about what others have said makes them happy. Why is that?

 

To be honest, I think you started this thread because you knew you would get BW's to answer and then you could bring out the "bitter" word. Problem is, we actually answered your question, but you refuse to acknowledge that simple fact. And, why is that?

Edited April 20, 2011 by herenow

[daisy love]

Do you have any updates on when he is filing for D?

 

You last predicted Summer of '11 and that's getting awfully close. I presume, based on your previous history, he has managed to hide a majority of his considerable assets from his W by now. Or very nearly in any case.

 

Is that timeline still in effect?

I have NO IDEA AT ALL what your question has to do with MY THREAD!

 

He is working on a managed exit, if you must know. These things take time.

[herenow]

I have NO IDEA AT ALL what your question has to do with MY THREAD!

 

He is working on a managed exit, if you must know. These things take time.

 

Does his wife know about said "managed" exit? If not, then I doubt it will be very "managed".

 

To keep on topic, someone else mentioned other "gifts" the MM may have given you. Can you tell us about that? I would love to hear about the wonderful things the MM does for you that make you happy.

 

Oh, and while your at it, can you answer some of the many questions in my previous posts on this thread? If not, no worries, just wondering.

Edited April 20, 2011 by herenow

[daisy love]

OK, your happy. I'm happy for you (as I have already said in a previous post). What kind of support are you looking for?

 

BTW, I posted about what "gifts" make me happy. Are you happy for me? Or, do I not deserve to be happy because I'm married to my husband?

 

Most of the posters here have acknowledged your happiness, but you have not said anything about what others have said makes them happy. Why is that?

 

To be honest, I think you started this thread because you knew you would get BW's to answer and then you could bring out the "bitter" word. Problem is, we actually answered your question, but you refuse to acknowledge that simple fact. And, why is that?

Last time I looked, I was on the OW BOARD! I asked the OW BOARD what kinds of gifts they have received. I EXPECTED OW to respond to a question on an OW BOARD! What a mistake! Only a handful of OW have written back!

 

You BS come here to the OW Board to talk about your gifts, as if an OW would care. Alls you want to do is gloat and show off on an OW BOARD! Why is that? Why not show off on YOUR OWN BOARD!!

[herenow]

Last time I looked, I was on the OW BOARD! I asked the OW BOARD what kinds of gifts they have received. I EXPECTED OW to respond to a question on an OW BOARD! What a mistake! Only a handful of OW have written back!

 

You BS come here to the OW Board to talk about your gifts, as if an OW would care. Alls you want to do is gloat and show off on an OW BOARD! Why is that? Why not show off on YOUR OWN BOARD!!

 

Then why did you ask me about gifts I get from my H? I wasn't going to talk about my H until you specifically asked me.

 

However, why do you have such a problem with BW getting gifts from our husbands? Since, again, you did ask.

 

It's not our fault that OW's haven't answered your thread.

 

You have gotten some very heartwarming answers from both BW and OW, and yet, you seem so angry about all of it. Many of the posts on this thread have made me smile. It matters not that a post is from a BW or OW, I'm happy that such kindness exists.

 

Why have you not acknowledged some of the wonderful things people have done for each other? Why do you focus so much on your anger towards BW? Oh, and why do you have so much anger towards BW?

 

So many questions, so few answers. Such is life.

Edited April 20, 2011 by herenow

[jwi71]

I have NO IDEA AT ALL what your question has to do with MY THREAD!

 

Simply asking for an update on YOUR story. No more, no less.

 

I didn't realize asking YOU about YOUR situation on YOUR thread would provoke such a response.

 

Is it inappropriate to ask YOU for an update on YOUR thread?

 

He is working on a managed exit, if you must know. These things take time.

 

Oh boy. I have a news flash for you - it DOESN'T take time. Certainly not the, what, 9 months is it now?

 

I think you should guard your heart...I have a feeling summer will come and go and he still hasn't moved 3000 miles to be with you.

[26pointblue]

I guess my question would be - who cares what MMs get us if they don't give us what we really want which is an exclusive relationship [assuming we are in love with them, they're in love with us, & that's what we want & they say they want too. I understand there are other benefits of being in an affair & gifts/material or financial things may be among them, but for me, they meant diddly squat if he couldn't give me all of him. In fact it's a rather insulting way to try to buy my patience if you ask me! I was reading a book where the main character received a necklace from her MM & she said something like, 'these are the things men give us when they can't give us what we really want.' And I thought, how true!']

 

To answer your question my xMM bought me vacations, drinks, dinners, flowers, money [as in, cash he always gave me], spa trips for me & my friends like your MM does, a huge VIP party at a club for my birthday complete with a bottle of Grey Goose & free instant entrance for me & all my friends etc. That was all very nice but I think he did it in part because he couldn't give me what I truly wanted [see above] & what hurts is that all I wanted was all of his love, which is free!!! On an interesting side note, he never bought me jewelry & when I asked why he said he felt like that would be a cheap way of trying to buy my love & that when he buys me jewelry it will be a diamond ring. Looking back I don't know if that was his way of being cheap [he's usually not cheap at all], or if buying me something so personal would signify to him that we were a real couple, or what. I actually appreciate it because in the end I would have had to just throw or give them away -- maybe he knew this & that's what he meant, Idk.

 

I'm not trying to be rude in my post to you but the above is what it made me think of, so I decided to share. I got a heap of financial rewards for being his OW & honestly it may be part of why I stayed so long, which may have been his trick, sub-conscious or overtly or whatever. When I really thought about it it's part of why I got tired of being his OW although I did/do love xMM very much. I would love any gifts he got me a lot more if I really had him, but, I didn't, & so the gifts & money just made me realize that all the more. If you are really happy with the locket, great, but I was not happy with money stuff, I wanted everything emotionally.

 

And I do get your point that this is an OW board & your question was obviously aimed towards OWs. It came off as a little 'braggy' so maybe that's what stirred the pot . . . I guess I'm not sure what point you're overall trying to make but I do get that your question was intended for OWs.

[Spark1111]

Last time I looked, I was on the OW BOARD! I asked the OW BOARD what kinds of gifts they have received. I EXPECTED OW to respond to a question on an OW BOARD! What a mistake! Only a handful of OW have written back!

 

You BS come here to the OW Board to talk about your gifts, as if an OW would care. Alls you want to do is gloat and show off on an OW BOARD! Why is that? Why not show off on YOUR OWN BOARD!!

 

Daisy, we are all free to post wherever we want to on LS.

 

I am not sure why this is upsetting you so. Many said the locket sounds lovely.

 

I think my fWS gave his fOW lingerie, flowers, a necklace? weekends out of town, dinners, and he bought a tv for her son.

 

Is this what you wanted posted to this thread?

[herenow]

And I do get your point that this is an OW board & your question was obviously aimed towards OWs. It came off as a little 'braggy' so maybe that's what stirred the pot . . . I guess I'm not sure what point you're overall trying to make but I do get that your question was intended for OWs.

 

Great post. I would imagine many will agree with you.

 

As far as her asking for answers from OW, that is what I thought too. Until she ask me about gifts I get. That, IMO, opened the door to BW.

 

No matter what (or who), some of the answers on this thread are wonderful. Including yours since it sounds like you have made the best choice for your own happiness. I'm happy for you and Daisy and anyone else who is truly happy.

[daisy love]

<SIGH> I started this thread to give OW a chance to celebrate something about the men they love. I did not start this thread for people to be ugly or to pick apart MY relationship with MY LOVE! Someone YOU know NOTHING ABOUT!

 

I've made a big mistake coming here. Too bad this isn't a place where OW can be happy.

[herenow]

<SIGH> I started this thread to give OW a chance to celebrate something about the men they love. I did not start this thread for people to be ugly or to pick apart MY relationship with MY LOVE! Someone YOU know NOTHING ABOUT!

 

I've made a big mistake coming here. Too bad this isn't a place where OW can be happy.

 

How many times do you have to be told that we are happy you are happy before you actually acknowledge it? No one is picking apart anything. Have you read the wonderful things on this thread? Or, are you only interested in slamming BW's?

[BB07]

<SIGH> I started this thread to give OW a chance to celebrate something about the men they love. I did not start this thread for people to be ugly or to pick apart MY relationship with MY LOVE! Someone YOU know NOTHING ABOUT!

 

I've made a big mistake coming here. Too bad this isn't a place where OW can be happy.

 

 

You must not have spent much time reading here Daisy or you would know that a post such as yours would provoke some sarcasm or else you expected it to happen and didn't really care. Only you know the answer. BTW.........there are other places out there that are more supportive for your type of posts.

[fooled once]

The sweetest present I ever received from my beloved was his heart :love: Perhaps his D from his xW and the wedding ring he gave me may mean more to some people on this board, but to me, his love means way more than any piece of paper.

 

Enjoy your locket, Daisy, and ignore the jealous comments

 

Can you please point out the "jealous" comments?

 

WHY DO ALL OF MY THREADS GET CRAPPED ON?

I asked a simple question and alls I get is sarcasm and BITTERNESS AND JEALOUSY in return! It must really destroy your little worlds to think an OW could be HAPPY!

 

THANK YOU OWoman for your kind words! I hope I can follow in your footsteps one day when my baby is all mine. Until then, I'll love him and I'll celebrate US!

 

If any other REAL OW want to post, I hope they do. It's too bad all of the bitterness cause REAL OW to not post. I know you ladies have received something nice from your man. If you don't want to post OK. Just be happy and don't let ANYONE take that away from you!!!!!

 

I received diamond earrings, diamond bracelet, various pieces of clothing, flowers almost weekly and trips to various islands, states and resorts. That was from the MM I was with years and years ago.

 

I just celebrated 13 years married to my 2nd husband earlier this week. We got each other cards He buys me whatever I want whenever I want it; no special occassion needed. He gave me his heart, his soul and his love. He also gave me a daughter I didn't have to give birth to. He gave me a wonderful role model for my son.

 

Look at the content Daisy... Are those people you wish to identify with or seek approval from? I tell you, be who you are and BE HAPPY. Some of them are very mixed-up and are seen to post VERY conflicting things depending on what medium they're posting in and who they're trying to impress on the day...

 

Don't be like that. Be transparent and upfront and true to yourself. Enjoy who you are and ignore those who seek to hurt you on an Internet forum!

 

Can you show me where the posts are from people who are "mixed up" and seem very conflicting?

 

I honestly didn't see any sarcasm or jealousy in this thread at all. I think it's a fun thread. My favorite material gift is my Tiffany's ring because everytime we would walk by Tiffany's I would go in and look at it and try it on so he surprised me with it. Technically it looks like an engagement ring, but I wear it on my right hand. It's my favorite ring in the world and when we do get engaged I don't even want a different one, maybe I will just tell him to get me a different ring for my right hand and move my current one to my left LOL.

 

My favorite non-material gift is the way he loves my son and gets along with my ex-husband for the sake of me and my son. He has worked so hard to create a good relationship for all of us and gain the trust of my ex-husband. I am grateful that three adults in this situation can all get along so well despite the fact that other people think it odd that we all go out to dinner together with my son after school events and sporting events etc.... I appreciate all of the hard work my BF had put into creating a healthy and loving environment for my son.

 

Daisy, if you are happy, I am happy for you.

 

Great post!

 

No her OP was not directed to you specifically. Yes she was vague in "guy" stance but really the tone turned, as it is apt to do here, by jthorne's comment which was not needed.

 

I am sure Daisy is fine with anyone gushing but the pointless posts are those taking potshots at her gushes.

 

Why, when this is OW/OM do others feel the need. . . you know not worth it; it is so redundant here.

 

My question, why not gush over on Marriage? I wouldn't gush at about my husband on this forum when I was married. Just like I wouldn't gush about my husband over on LD. There is really no reason.

 

what did jthorne say that YOU personally found that was "not needed"?

 

Interesting how this is only acceptable when it's those whose As DIDN'T work out helping those "who can't see things because they're in the middle of them", rather than those of us whose As DID work out wonderfully.

 

If someone was happy with crumbs for 20 / 18 / less than 5 or however many years and then suddenly sees the light and hallelujah! wants to save every OW from the possibility that something good might actually come out of her A - which may be with a guy of considerably more integrity than the slimeball that the unfortunate fOW had the misfortune to be taken in by for 20 / 18 / less than 5 years - fair enough. It takes all sorts to make a world. But at least own it for what it is - sour grapes that things didn't work out for them, as it has for some of the rest of us, and as it might yet work out for others.

Daisy, if you're happy, enjoy it. You have every right to your happiness, and no one's small minded sniping can take that from you.

 

what are you trying to imply OW? If you want to call someone out, instead of being passive aggressive about it; why not state it plainly? Whose posts did you have a problem with? Why didn't you just ignore the posts? Are you trying to take jabs at someone in your paragraph I bolded above? Or are you just making a general statement?

 

Are you implying that those of us who have been through an affair and are glad we aren't in one anymore (and no longer with the married person) have "sour grapes"? Who exactly are you speaking of?

 

Who is small minded? Who are you talking about?

 

Instead of making passive aggressive jabs about someone, why not just state whose views you disagree with ? And just because you disagree with them, does that make their posts less valid?

 

I mean, we all know a couple former members who are still sitting at home and waiting and waiting and waiting for the MM they are each seeing (5+ years later) to divorce and neither are these MM any further along in divorce proceedings than they were when they first started having their current affair. Heck, both of these mistresses rely on the MM helping them pay their bills! Both have children who know they are the mistress! So because some former OW want to share their past, you call it sour grapes. Why? You have even made up another name for a certain type of OW - I believe it was "COW" - as in Catlady Other Woman. Wouldn't those former members fit in that category since both are still waiting and waiting and waiting? Are you saying it is better to be in a long term (and in my mind dead end) affair than to be with someone who can truly share your life with them OUT IN THE OPEN?

 

I think it is great so many former OW take the time to share their views with 'newer' other woman, especially the younger ones, so they do not spend so much time with a MM when they have a better chance of finding a single person to share their life with. Is it not better to try to caution some women about the pain and agony many could have in their lives if they continue to stay in an affair? How is that such a bad thing? How is that "sour grapes" as you liked to claim?

[herenow]

Fooled, there are no jealous comments or bitterness. I think some are reacting to how they thought or hoped BW would respond. Truth is, we just answered the question honestly and said we are happy Daisy is happy. I don't think that is what she wanted to hear.

 

Daisy refuses to acknowledge that her question has been answered (by OW and BW) in so many wonderful ways. She just harps on how horrible this thread is and how bitter we all are.

 

Makes me think she wants BW's to be bitter for some reason. I keep asking her why she has such an issues with BW's, but she refuses to answer that question as well.

[whichwayisup]

Fooled, there are no jealous comments or bitterness. I think some are reacting to how they thought or hoped BW would respond. Truth is, we just answered the question honestly and said we are happy Daisy is happy. I don't think that is what she wanted to hear.

 

Daisy refuses to acknowledge that her question has been answered (by OW and BW) in so many wonderful ways. She just harps on how horrible this thread is and how bitter we all are.

 

Makes me think she wants BW's to be bitter for some reason. I keep asking her why she has such an issues with BW's, but she refuses to answer that question as well.

 

I can't see it either.

 

And when I say this I mean no offense to any OW in particular, but if anyone is going to be abit jealous, or envious that Daisy's MM is forking out gifts to her and pleasing her by spending $$, it's going to be other women in affairs with MM who don't get ravished and spoiled by their MM. Not BS's, or anybody else just passing through.

 

And, I'm sure there are some OW, or people in general who just don't care either way, that materialistic gifts don't mean as much as actions and committment.

[herenow]

 

And, I'm sure there are some OW, or people in general who just don't care either way, that materialistic gifts don't mean as much as actions and committment.

 

Yes, and some of the posts here prove that.

[bentnotbroken]

AND every time it is brought up that MANY of the responses were NOT "bitter" and very much OT and those were the ONLY responses that weren't responded to, there is no explanation. Why d'ya suppose that is?

Donna, I don't know why, but it does seem wonky.

[Rose1977]

Last time I looked, I was on the OW BOARD! I asked the OW BOARD what kinds of gifts they have received. I EXPECTED OW to respond to a question on an OW BOARD! What a mistake! Only a handful of OW have written back!

 

You BS come here to the OW Board to talk about your gifts, as if an OW would care. Alls you want to do is gloat and show off on an OW BOARD! Why is that? Why not show off on YOUR OWN BOARD!![/QUOTE]

 

 

And you have not acknowledged any of the OW who have responded to you which makes me question your intent with this thread. If you had posted in YOUR thread that you only wanted responses from OW, the BS's would have left YOUR thread alone. You got the answers you wanted and you ignored them.

[Rose1977]

Donna, I don't know why, but it does seem wonky.

 

Agree . And Bent, I was shocked about the tats too. Don't know why.

[jj33]

Daisy Im sorry you have had such a difficult time of it on here. You will find that if you celebrate your happiness on this forum because it is a public mixed forum people who are not happy about affairs may not be happy for you and in some instances use it to make fun of you here and elsewhere on the internet. Be very careful about how much information you give out.

 

If you want to go NC or end your affair, this is the place to be. If you want to celebrate your happiness be ready for what you saw on this thread.

 

Im glad you are enjoying the locket.

[JadedAmore]

Hi!

My Sexy Studmuffin was in ;)!

He bought me the sweetest present this weekend! It was a gold locket with some diamonds on it! What girl doesn't just love diamonds!

In it was the sweetest note! It read, "to the sweetest cookie I love to eat":love:

 

What's the sweetest present your guy ever got u?

 

Freedom, by respecting my wishes for NC.

[Silly_Girl]

FO, no; I'm not prepared to get an infraction (that comment may or may not mean something to you). but it was nothing you'd posted