Women, If You were a Man, Would You Marry?

[Woggle]

Bwahahahahahahaahahahahahahahahaa!!!!!!!!!!

 

I think you just described about half the men in the world.

 

Did my mother get an account on LS?

[zengirl]

Yes, so far as I know.

 

Many men do want to be married (statistics show more male college graduates prioritize marriage than female college grads, BTW), so it's silly to act like men don't like and get things out of marriage. Many do. Especially in the populations (educated, financially stable, slightly older when they marry) that are least likely to divorce.

 

I find it odd when people look at marriage primarily through the lens of potential divorce. I'd say anyone who does that probably should not get married.

[Woggle]

Yes, so far as I know.

 

Many men do want to be married (statistics show more male college graduates prioritize marriage than female college grads, BTW), so it's silly to act like men don't like and get things out of marriage. Many do. Especially in the populations (educated, financially stable, slightly older when they marry) that are least likely to divorce.

 

I find it odd when people look at marriage primarily through the lens of potential divorce. I'd say anyone who does that probably should not get married.

 

When divorce can cost you everything you worked for it is very right to think about when marrying.

[zengirl]

When divorce can cost you everything you worked for it is very right to think about when marrying.

 

I'm all for getting a prenup if financial assets are an issue. But anyone who's obsessed with the possibility of failure (divorce) isn't ready to get married, IMO.

[DreamerGirl27]

Originally Posted by sweetjasmine

If I were a man, I'd never marry. I'd rather spend my life sleeping with a wide variety of hot 20-something babes and playing first-person shooters after work. Or more realistically, dying at 55 of a heart attack and being found glued to my computer chair with my pants down and Cheetos stains on my fingers and t-shirt. No compromising allowed!

 

This. Why get married when you can have this as your future?

[Woggle]

I love how people here think all unmarried men are unhealthy slobs living in squalor. My father never remarried after my mother and he is one of the happiest guys I know in his old age. Finally he is at peace and his place looks just fine. He is retired and works part time and on his days off he just enjoys life. Meanwhile my mother is one of the most miserable people I know which is I why think she wants everybody else to be miserable.

[Nikki Sahagin]

I love how people here think all unmarried men are unhealthy slobs living in squalor. My father never remarried after my mother and he is one of the happiest guys I know in his old age. Finally he is at peace and his place looks just fine. He is retired and works part time and on his days off he just enjoys life. Meanwhile my mother is one of the most miserable people I know which is I why think she wants everybody else to be miserable.

 

Woggle, you don't seem to like marriage, or agree with it, or really believe in it. Why did you get married? Wouldn't you be happier if you left your wife? Sometimes it seems you want to from your posts.

[Woggle]

Woggle, you don't seem to like marriage, or agree with it, or really believe in it. Why did you get married? Wouldn't you be happier if you left your wife? Sometimes it seems you want to from your posts.

 

I love my marriage to my wife but I am aware that many men do not have what I have. I am also just fighting back against some of the women who act like men are nothing more than useless slobs who live to make their wives life miserable. Somebody has to speak up for the guys and I guess that is me. I am all for happy marriages and they do exist but sadly there are not many these days.

[dreamingoftigers]

Did my mother get an account on LS?

 

If she did, I am so outta here.

[sweetjasmine]

I love how people here think all unmarried men are unhealthy slobs living in squalor. My father never remarried after my mother and he is one of the happiest guys I know in his old age. Finally he is at peace and his place looks just fine. He is retired and works part time and on his days off he just enjoys life. Meanwhile my mother is one of the most miserable people I know which is I why think she wants everybody else to be miserable.

 

Woggle, I was responding to stupid generalizations with more stupid generalizations. It's a waste of time and effort to take the OP seriously.

[J200]

I love how people here think all unmarried men are unhealthy slobs living in squalor. My father never remarried after my mother and he is one of the happiest guys I know in his old age. Finally he is at peace and his place looks just fine.

 

I plan to be EXACTLY like your father except I am a woman . I do not eve want to get married (not even once) but want to live happy in old age. Not all unmarried women end up crazy and with 10 cats like most people like to believe.

 

 

If I was a man I would probably never get married and be a whore monger.Visit Amsterdam, Thailand and just have sex with whores. Too bad there is no sex tourism for women (there actually is but it's on a MUCH smaller scale than what is available for men).

[J200]

But courts don't usually side with men and women tend to be more prone to waking up one day and wanting out while she takes everything he has.

 

That's not true. JEssica Simpson pays spousal support I think.

[Woggle]

That's not true. JEssica Simpson pays spousal support I think.

 

That's one in a million and I doubt she still has. Britney Spears paid child support for a while but that is because she went off her rocker and the father got custody.

 

Look at Paul Mcartney and Phill Collins. They got hosed in divorce court.

[dreamingoftigers]

I plan to be EXACTLY like your father except I am a woman . I do not eve want to get married (not even once) but want to live happy in old age. Not all unmarried women end up crazy and with 10 cats like most people like to believe.

 

 

If I was a man I would probably never get married and be a whore monger.Visit Amsterdam, Thailand and just have sex with whores. Too bad there is no sex tourism for women (there actually is but it's on a MUCH smaller scale than what is available for men).

 

My grandmother's husband left 35 years ago and she is amazing. She is in her late 80s and she jogs everywhere, volunteers at the food bank and the museum in her town making up full-time hours. She invests super-wisely and has great great sense. She helps out her family and raised me for the first 7 years of my life. Every year she buys about 50 Barbie Dolls and sews extra sets of clothing for them and sends off blankets to children still affected by the Chernobyl disaster.

 

My grandmother also hates cats and is completely on the ball.

 

Her mother was "with it" too, but grumpier, she passed away at 103, when I was 14 years old. from the 1970s-1994 she lived alone and managed to keep things going for herself.

 

Screw LS, I am gonna give grandma a call. You guys whap each other about marriage, I'll be back in awhile.

[Woggle]

I also would never visit Thailand because having sex with teenage slaves does not appeal to me at all. When I was a player the thrill of getting grown women to desire me was a big part of the fun. If I ever to use a prostitute I would get in touch with a high class madam or go to Nevada. A woman having sex with me because her pimp will beat her if she doesn't disgusts me.

[giotto]

I would get in touch with a high class madam or go to Nevada.

 

 

sorry, W, I'm not from the States... what's in Nevada, exactly? Should I move there?

[Woggle]

sorry, W, I'm not from the States... what's in Nevada, exactly? Should I move there?

 

Prostitution is legal there.

[giotto]

Prostitution is legal there.

 

ah, I see... didn't know that!

[Kristi can't sleep]

WOGGLE,

I can't find your post in this thread, but i'm referring to the question about women losing their attraction for their husbands (or complaining about them)

 

I'm coming up on my tenth anniversary. *Obviously we're having problems, but I can tell you with all honesty that I would rather sleep with my husband than ANY other man on the planet, period. I love every hair on his head. My husband is in average shape I think you'd say, but I think his body is perfect - for REAL perfect, not in the BS cliche way that sounds - I LOVE to look at him, and I love HIM completely. We *were* best friends.

 

I don't know what's happening in my marriage. I don't know why he's changed. In fact, I'm so confused, semi-dazed and hurt that probably the only thing I AM sure of is that whatever's going on with him has NOTHING whatsoever to do with my lack of attraction or loyalty to him. Ive never cheated, never thought about it, wouldn't do it for a million dollars - not even now.

 

And yes, even if my worst fears are true and I divorce him, I think i'd still do it over again. There was happiness in this house. We laughed every day. We did so many crazy things together, treated eachother with so much genuine KINDNESS, I couldn't IMAGINE spending the last 10yrs with anyone but him. I really, really love the man, and I don't think that will ever go away even if it's over between us.

[Woggle]

WOGGLE,

I can't find your post in this thread, but i'm referring to the question about women losing their attraction for their husbands (or complaining about them)

 

I'm coming up on my tenth anniversary. *Obviously we're having problems, but I can tell you with all honesty that I would rather sleep with my husband than ANY other man on the planet, period. I love every hair on his head. My husband is in average shape I think you'd say, but I think his body is perfect - for REAL perfect, not in the BS cliche way that sounds - I LOVE to look at him, and I love HIM completely. We *were* best friends.

 

I don't know what's happening in my marriage. I don't know why he's changed. In fact, I'm so confused, semi-dazed and hurt that probably the only thing I AM sure of is that whatever's going on with him has NOTHING whatsoever to do with my lack of attraction or loyalty to him. Ive never cheated, never thought about it, wouldn't do it for a million dollars - not even now.

 

And yes, even if my worst fears are true and I divorce him, I think i'd still do it over again. There was happiness in this house. We laughed every day. We did so many crazy things together, treated eachother with so much genuine KINDNESS, I couldn't IMAGINE spending the last 10yrs with anyone but him. I really, really love the man, and I don't think that will ever go away even if it's over between us.

 

I truly do not undersand why men in marriages like this have to go and ruin it. Do not they not understand how lucky they are?

[Taramere]

1) By marrying, he takes on the risk that there is 50-50 chance he is going to lose half of his wealth in the future.

 

Not where I live. Here, matrimonial assets are those which have been acquired during the marriage. If a man regards those as "mine" rather than "ours" then he's probably going to feel hard done by - unless, of course, the woman has made a greater financial contribution (which certainly isn't unheard of in this day and age).

 

 

2) By marrying, he restricts himself to having sex with only one woman for the rest of his life in a world where a man has complete sexual freedom.

 

The same goes for women, if the marriage vows are to be adhered to strictly. Given the figures for infidelity, it seems fair to say that a fair number of people aren't actually restricting themselves.

 

3) Since in nearly all marriages the man is richer and the woman is more beautiful, by marrying, a man agrees to enter a disadvantageous long term deal in which chances are his financial value will only rise overtime while her physical value will only steadily decline. In other words, marriage is good investment for the woman and poor investment for the man.

 

If that is the lens through which you examine human relationships, then you probably shouldn't get married.

 

I would think that in the scenario you've outlined there, it would be no more in the woman's interests to get married than it would be in the man's interests. In the Western world it's not necessary for a woman to get married in order to have the bare necessities for survival. Marriage is something most people do in the hope of increasing their personal happiness. It would be extremely foolish for anybody to try to find happiness with somebody who was going to perceive them as diminishing in value with every day that passed.

[Kristi can't sleep]

OPB Woggle:

I truly do not undersand why men in marriages like this have to go and ruin it. Do not they not understand how lucky they are?

 

Okay, didn't really have anything to say but I'm such a basket case lately that reading your reply almost made me teary. Then, I'm reading through the thread and getting confused, because some of your posts sounded so different from each other, I thought I had the wrong person.

 

So, I clicked on your name to follow it back, and... First, I've BEEN to EJ's so THAT was a SHOCK, LOL, second, Woggle, is that your WIFE?? She's BEAUTIFUL!!

 

Woggle - hopefully I'm not mixing this up but, from what I gather you are relatively happily married but concerned about the future, correct?

 

I know I'm hijacking here, but if you have a gorgeous wife who is good to you, YOU are the one who lucked out - I am baffled. Do you not feel that your wife is as attracted to you as she was at first or are you worried that she might become that way? Attraction is so fluid - it rises and falls throughout the years, but even the most persistent ruts end or can be fixed. We've had some years better than others, but on the whole, sex got better as time passed - you just have to be a little creative.

 

Since I *did* have what I think was a great marriage for the better part of 10 yrs, I can tell you one thing besides trust that I believe makes a huge and immediate impact - you have to do something fun together, just the two of you, on a semi-regular basis, NOT involving sex (not right away at least, lol). I think people tend to link their spouse with the bills, and the mortgage, and the chores - with all the daily BS of life. Where she was once your escape, your source of fun, marriage can rob that feeling unless you make it a point not to let it.

 

We've gone to a bar and dropped phony lottery tickets on the floor. We've had food fights, towel snapping fights that had us racing all over the house half-lit and covered with welts the next day (but it was can't catch your breath fun- worth every mark). We've pulled $500 out our account, left the CC's at home, picked a direction and just drove and stopped wherever... Misjudged the $$ and had to sleep in the car the last night, which was the best part - we'd parked at a rest stop and a hooker knocked on the window at 3am.

 

You get the picture. And yes, I know that the above is immature & not every 30-something's idea of a good time (especially since we're closer to 40) but WTH? Do something that works for YOU. If you get her out of breath & laughing, the rest will follow.

 

You seem like a decent, if cynical person... I say scrap the cynicism and be happy - I don't think you have a thing in the world to worry about.

 

Sorry about the sidetrack OP, but it is sort of relevant - it's what I think makes marriage worth a gamble.

 

BTW, Woggle, you are a handsome young guy - she's lucky too. If she forgot, remind her!

[Woggle]

I know how lucky I am but sometimes I have a hard time beliving it is real. I hear the way some women talk and see how many of my friends are treated and I can't believe I actually found a good one. Don't take this the wrong way but it seems that women like her just don't exist anymore. My first marriage was just pure hell and after that I said the hell with women so I am shocked I actually found a good one. I feel like I got the last of a discontinued brand sometimes. I really don't hate women but I will respond when I hear my gender being attacked. I put up with hatred being shoved in my face for too long.

 

I had a very abusive mother who taught me to hate myself because I was born and undoing the years of self hatred is not easy.

[She's_NotInLove_w/Me]

My marriage is no bed of roses, its give me the best times of my life, and also horrible at other times, and everything in between...

 

But the bottom line is that she and my five children truly give me purpose in life... When thing get rough, and they seem hopeless, I remember what I have invested here. I genuinely believe divorce can and very often does mess up the children. That's not to say I believe in staying for the kids. I believe in working on it for you. My wife and kids give ME purpose in life. Without them, I am just an island, sure I will still have some meaningful relationships, sure I will contribute to society, however, I certainly will not have what I have now. I am the leader in my household. The masculine being. The Husband. The Daddy. This to me is truly priceless... It FAR supersedes my business successes and skills, etc.

 

I've said it before in this thread and I will say it again: WITHOUT GREAT RISK THERE IS NOT GREAT REWARD!

 

And lastly, over 96% of married and/or engaged couples do not have prenuptial agreements... why is that?

[ladydesigner]

1) By marrying, she takes on the risk that there is 50-50 chance she is going to lose half of her wealth in the future.

 

2) By marrying, she restricts herself to having sex with only one man for the rest of her life in a world where a woman has complete sexual freedom.

 

3) Since in some marriages the woman is richer and the man is somewhat attractive, by marrying, a woman agrees to enter a disadvantageous long term deal in which chances are her financial value will only rise overtime while his physical value will only steadily decline. In other words, marriage is good investment for the man and poor investment for the woman.

 

Just had to put a spin on it, since in my M I am the breadwinner and better looking one...