day two of no contact...dont laugh!

[tom_gbr]

well im very pissed...i text my ex girlfriend tonight but i cant remember what i said to her. i think it was something along the lines of that im missin talking to her....i wish i didnt though.

 

i think i something along these lines but i cant remember...she hasnt text back which isnt good

 

i really wish i could remeber what u said. hope it wasnt anything stupid

[tom_gbr]

god i feel hungover...why did i drink so much last night....didnt really help that i started drinking at around 4...lol.

....im blaiming it on the good weather...but then i have been drunk everyday since wednesday

 

i really cant remember if i sent the ex a message or not...and if i did what i put in it! im going to have to text her tonight apologising and telling her that i was very drunk. i also want to drop a hint about chatting on MSN...like saying "ill be on MSN tonight if you wanna catch up"

 

im thinking about her less which is good...i have an interview for my second job this thursday so im looking forward to that....its at a supermarket where a lot of goodlooking girls work

 

i really do miss talking to her...im hoping we can chat on MSN soon as at the moment i think im still blocked..i would email her but she never checks her inbox

[tom_gbr]

still feel hungover...lol....done a lot of exercise today so atleast ive done something...looking better than ever. going to text the ex girlfriend soon and apologise just incase i said something stupid when i texted her last night...also say something like "might see you on msn sometime soon".....thats my hint for her to unblock me...lol

 

i think im nearly over her.....i still think about her a lot but its not getting me upset anymore...im not constantly thinking about her which is good and when i do i think of all the memories which is cool.

 

i was sitting in the garden yesterday chilling with a beer and was looking at the hammock we have and thinking back to when me and her used to lay in it on the summer nights...i didnt feel that upset.

 

im really starting to realise that i am capable of meeting someone as sexy and funny and clever as my ex and who can love me as much and even more than she did.

 

i really want to have regular contact with her but i think that she's going to be thinking that im trying to get her back...when all i want is to chat with her and tell her all the things that are happening in my life.

 

im hoping that she will unblock me sometime soon in the next couple of weeks or something so we can keep in contact on it.

[tom_gbr]

well i sent a text to the ex girlfriend saying sorry if i said anything stupid in the message that i think i sent last night and hope that i speak to her on msn soon.....and she hasnt replied....i sent it around 2 hours ago and no reply...she always replys straight away.

 

its quite weird as in the past i would of phoned her by now asking if shes ok but right now i dont really seem to care...i really think im moving on. i texted her and apologised...i didnt want to text her but thought i should.

 

so much for her thinking its important to come out of this as friends...i deserve better.

 

well i think i know what im doing with all my photos etc of me and my ex.....my dads new BBQ looks like a good storage place right now

[tom_gbr]

i seem to be getting and better day by day...just came back from visiting a friend of mine on the coast...it was great it really took my mind of my ex...i met all her friends and they were a right laugh...it felt good getting along with strangers and making new friends.

 

i think the love that i have for her is fading each day...im starting to find myself more attracted to other girls that i see when im out which is a really good sign...as before i would look at them and compare them to my ex which isnt good really.

 

i think im changing how im feeling rapidly now because i heard that she is moving on and is interested in someone else...but from what ive heard her hasnt been keeping in contact with her and might have lost interest...it might make her realise how good i was to her and how much i appreciated her. im not sure if anything has happened with this guy but i find it helps to put myself in the situation that they something has...i dont know why....i think its because if nothing yet has happened i still feel like theres hope....hope that she will want me.

 

i think what has upset me the most about the whole break up is that we both said that we would be close friends...i really do miss just talking to her about how she is and what she has been up too....i miss telling her about what i have been up to and my day...i would like it so much in a couple of months if we could meet up and do something...as friends but i know she wont want this to happen.

 

i think she thinks that im still obsessed and madly in love with her...when im not.

 

how do i go about getting her in my life as a friend? what can i say or do to make her realise that im not trying to get her back and friendship is all that i want?

[MarKus]

Hi there fella,

how ru doing?

 

If i were you i'd leave it for a while....let everything settle for a bit....then give her a call...tell her you would like to remain close friends with her and that you are not trying to get her back....then its up to her.

 

Im in a sorta simmilar position....im on a break of 4 months...i know it looks quite bleak for me....but she does continue to text me....i had gone for a period of 7 weeks not texting her....after she tried to text me asking me to text her back....then last week i did, (just simple) and we exchanged a couple of texts.

 

I miss her friendship....our releationship was 3 years....i thought after all that time together we woul remain and she would still want to be friends....but by the way shes acting it dosnt quite seem that way.....but i know she does...deep down....and by the texts shes sent me.

 

but im not at the stage yet to call her asking to be friends.....not yet.

 

 

Oh tom whereabouts in the uk do u live, im in south west

[tom_gbr]

i would of been happy to leave it a while but she text me tonight...she said " so, hows the single life treatin u? x " ...which means she knows about going to portsmouth to see this girl.

 

i wasnt going to but i texted back...i said "hi im ok....got a new job...bin out with uni mates a lot...just got back from portsmouth which was cool...what about u? "

 

she replied with " im all gud thanx. bin so busy. bin out loads. wot were u doin in portsmouth? x " i replied bak with " went to visit someone that i used to work with, was good but spend too much money, how is your mums weddin preparation goin? "

 

she then said " Oooo sum1s bein secretive!"...i said back " we have been mates for ages and thought it would be gud as i have never been before"

 

she then said " tom, dont make things up, im fine about it (ive been speakin to laura!) x ...laura is a friend of hers that knew about it....i said back " not that i have to explain myself but she got back with her boyfriend 3 days ago"...cant remember what else i said.

 

she then said " thats wot i just said. stop explain ureself. i really dont care"...so i replied with "ok, i know about u and this guy u met and i dont care, i dont know if anything has happened or not but i hope he can care for you and appreciate u as much as i do"

 

she then replied with " well dont worry coz he dusnt care, he doesnt even no me!"...i replied with something along the lines of " i just hope in a couple of months or so we can chat as friends, my feelings are fadin for u and i may not be in love with u but i love u like i do for my family. i miss speaking to you"

 

thats how it was left...she didnt reply....what the hell i supposed to think?...when she found out about me visiting this girl was she jealous?....why did she text me that message?...doesnt she want me to move on?...if she doesnt care why would she text me? i feel angry....angry that i had to explain myself for something when we arnt even together...i feel like a mug.

 

i know that im not in love with her anymore...but i still miss speakin to her...why is she acting like this? what do u think about my replys could i have said something better?

[hurtingandconfused]

i feel angry....angry

 

Friend, you need to let go! Stop the contact and begin your healing process.

[tom_gbr]

im well on my way to healing.....i know im not in love with her anymore...i just feel angry that i was explaining myself when i dont even had to....and the fact she doesnt contact me until she finds out about me seeing this girl in portsmouth.

 

its like she doesnt want me to move on, as soon as she notices that im interested in someone else or something she texts me so i start to think about her.

 

i wish i never replied now to her first message...i know she said she doesnt care but i now she must....if she didnt care why would she text me about it?

 

any chance of us being friends in the future..or even having any contact is over i think now

[MarKus]

i got text messages from sam saying stuff like this.

 

"Alright hows you. x"

 

 

"Hello, U ok you been up 2 much? Text Back x"

 

 

"Alright, u ok? been up to much? if i give u the money for doing it can you do sum of those photos of me please, do u remember the ones i like? U and ur family ok? x

 

 

"Alright, you finally got a car then? im buying my mums later in the year. U been up to much? Saw your mates the other day, hows your dog coping without the other? Text Back x"

 

 

So i thought sod it 7 weeks i havnt text or anything, so a week after getting it i replied to her last one....just something simple.

She replied

"Yeh im ok, did you only just get my text? U been up to much?"

 

 

Why the hell does she keep asking me "have i been up to much"??

 

 

Tom just leave it for now, i think there is a chance for you to be friends

[tom_gbr]

yeah thats what im going to do...just let everything cool down....again lol!...i think she was feeling a bit jealous even though she said she didnt care

 

i really hope we can out of this as friends...that wud make me happy...just gotta ride it out and see what happens

[tom_gbr]

im so confused and i really dont know what i want anymore...im not sure how i'm feeling about my ex and how i am going to move on.

 

its been two months now...two months apart and we both still seem to be hurting...i know she is moving on as she met this guy in a bar....dont know if anything is happening.

 

i really dont know what im feeling for her anymore....on some days i think im over her and i feel really happy that i could feel the same for someone else but on other days i cant stop thinking about her and everything we have had together...i seem to be thinking about her all the time at the moment.

 

i feel like im falling out of love with her but if i am why am i thinking about her all the time?....is it because she is my first love?

 

this month is the worst month for me......when we were together i had been looking forward to may as we were going to be alone in her house for two weeks...it would of been amazing...now i have to go through this month knowing that shes not spending it with me and for all i know it could be with someone else.

 

im not sure what else i can do to move on...i keep myself really busy....i dont sit down for 5 minutes unless im on the computer...i exersise everyday and go out with friends....but i still think about her all the time.

 

most of me wants to move on and try and meet someone else but the other bit of me wants the ex back...if anything i miss chatting to her....she feels the same....i miss telling her about my day and whats going on in my life.

 

i would like nothing better for us to meet up and hang out in a month or so's time but i cant see her wanting to.

 

i just want to feel happy again and to move on....

[tom_gbr]

there are so many things rushing around my head right now....i really am not sure what im feeling anymore. i feel angry for her breaking up with me and i think my love for her is fading by the day but i still really miss her.

 

not contacting her is getting much easier....the need to have contact with her is fading. the only contact we have is text messages every now and then.

 

i would like it so much if we could hang out as friends sometime soon....if anything i want her to see how much i have changed since she cut me out of her life....in a way i want her to regret it.

 

i still think about her loads.....is this normal with your first love?

 

some things make me really miss her....i was watching finding nemo earlier and before it came on they had adverts for other disney films.....an advert for the lion king came on and i just felt like crying...when i took her to disneyland paris the first thing we saw as we entered the park was the lion king parade was on...it made me miss her so much.

 

i am feeling much happier now,.....i feel so much better for starting my new job today.....i was working 9 hours putting out fruit and veg in a supermarket and i couldnt of been happier..lol....it was great just being really busy....and with the added bonus of loads of attractive girls working there as well.

 

its really important to me that we remain friends...if i knew i would never speak to her again after everything we have done together it would hurt me so much..

 

is it normal for me to be thinking about her all the time?

 

can it work us being friends?

[Martin Guerrini]

Considering that she was your first love. What's happening on your mind is absolutely normal. After 6 months you are going to be much better. But the fact is that she is already part of your life to a lesser or greater degree you will always remember her. That's the lesson of life.

[meanttolive4ever]

just stay strong,.

[tom_gbr]

today was a bad day for me.....i couldnt sleep last night and woke up really early in the morning and couldnt stop thinking about her....it really kicked in today that we will most probably never be together again and it really hurt.

 

This has been the longest that we havent spoke to one another....a week and a half now....i thought i would of heard from her tonight as i sent her mum a wedding card and i thought she would of got it today.....thought she would text me saying that it was really nice but she hasnt.....hope i got the address right.

 

i still miss her loads and think about her all the time...i still wonder what she is thinking....if shes missing me at all or even thinking about me.

 

the next couple of weeks are going to be hard for me...as she is going to be on her own in her dads house for two weeks and her mums wedding is also happening whoch i was meant to be going to.

 

i really want to still chat to her as a friend but im not even sure if she wants me in her life as a friend right now.

 

im keeping myself in shape and eating properly but ive started smoking again....im so stressed at the moment with all the uni work i have to do, that i didnt do in the last two months because of the break up.

 

this weekend approaching i think is the weekend of the wedding so im keeping myself real busy...staying with my mates for the whole weekend and we are going out on the pull both friday and saturday night so i hope i meet someone that i could text or date....i need that right now...i need to move on.

 

im not sure if i still love my ex or not....i must do a little otherwise i wouldnt be thinking about her all the time.

 

i really hope we can be able to chat as good friends sometime soon...maybe even meet up someday soon and do something together.

[tom_gbr]

well i texted my ex tonight.....i wanted to know how she was and ask her about the wedding card that i sent to her mum.

 

i text her saying " hey just thought id text to see how you are. what you been up too? have you got your exams soon? x "

 

she replied saying " hey did my mum text you?if she didnt she must have forgotten. she was really touched by the car. thanks. not bin up 2 much. been out with mates from work a few times and been revising loads because yeah i have exams soon. next week infact. how are you? been up 2 much? sorry about before. i wasnt being funny, just pleased for you. thought by now you would be able to tell me x "

 

if you have read my posts before two weekends ago i went to the coast to see a girl who i worked with. my ex texted me the night i got back basically asking about it...i told her she has a boyfriend and is a mate but i dont think she believes me.

 

i text back saying " no didnt get a text from your mum but im really pleased she liked it. havent been up too much....got loads of work to do.still going 2 gym. thought i would of given up by now! lol sorry as well for b4. dont know why i had to explain myself at the time. good luck with your exams. i know you will do well : ) x

 

its really strange....im not feeling sad or angry...i should be stressing that she thought i was seeing this girl when im not.

 

i hope she can feel she can contact me now if she wants to....everytime i start to want her back i think about all the bad things about the relationship... the fact that she's two hours away..the fact that i loved her more than she loved me...the age difference and the fact that there has been too much hurt to go back to being together.

 

i think i really do just want a friendship now...i want to be able to hang out with her sometime....talk freely as well.

[Martin Guerrini]

Free yourself Tom. Go and talk to her whatever you want.

[sinkerswim]

Im glad you are feeling that way, Tom...

Things seem to be getting better for you..

 

I just wish more than anything my ex fiance and I could be friends.

But when I called him last in March, he was cold and was like "What do you want?"

 

I still dont understand any of it.

We have shared sooooo much over the years, I cant understand why he is running away from me.

One of my male friends told me that he probably acted that way

Because he didnt want to give me false hope.

Or that he is running away because he cant face what he has done.

[asianpartyboy]

I am close to"not sad or angry" now.

 

I don't think it's a good idea to be friends anymore if you loved her so much. It's either one way or the other, not somewhere in between, you will get hurt more in the end.

 

I hope I am doing the right thing by not contacting her at all. What if we both got feelings for each other, still.

[tom_gbr]

today has been a really strange one for me....i woke up this morning missing my ex so much that it hurt.....this hasnt happened in ages...and i dont know why it happened but she was all i could think about all day.

 

i dont want her back.....i think about all the negatives of us being together all the time, the age difference....2 hour distance....the fact that she hurt me a couple of times....the fact that we never have time for one another...i think about all these things but i still think about her loads.

 

i have been feeling really good about myself recently....ive never looked so good and ive noticed a lot of girls staring at me when im out clubbing...i just havent got enough confidence to go up and chat to them.

 

i dont know if im missing my ex so much as she hasnt been getting in contact with me whatsoever unless i contact her first.....have i escaped her mind completley?......i dont understand why she just doesnt want to check how i am...she must still think about me.

 

what do you all think?

[Dixiecron]

I think you should try not contacting her. If she actually is your friend then she will contact you. Then you need to decide if you still want to reply.

[Durden]

Ive been split from my ex since january. Past few days i have thought about her alot. She phoned me on saturday and had a quick chat. I thought i was completely over her as well, but guess im not 100% Still think she's a bitch!!

And dixie is right, dont contact her. Aint worth it.

[tom_gbr]

well im feeling quite weak right now and really missing her voice and her laugh.....its been a week today since we had contact...i usually contact her once a week.

 

im wondering if she ever still thinks about me...am i just a fading memory?

[hurtingandconfused]

Tom you should really stop talking to her. Also stop thinking about her. You are making yourself "weak." It's all in your head if you control your thoughts you are able to do anything!!

 

My ex once told me..."did you know that people can make their heart stop beating by thinking." Ya well if that was true then...did you know that you can stop all this pain by thinking differently?