Should I let my Wife go out to clubs???????

[mav2112]

We have been married for 2 yrs and together for 4. She has just started wanting to go out to the bars maybe 3 time a month with her girlfriends. It is starting to really bother me for some reason. I think I trust her but really dont feel comfortable with her out. This wasnt a problem I could forsee when we were thinking about getting married.I didnt see this side of her as it has started happening the last six months. I really dont want a wife who likes to go out without me. When we talk about it she just gets pissed and says its not an issue because she rarely does it (3 times a month). I dont know if I

should just let her have her way and not fight it, but in the back of my mind I have never thought clubs and bars were the best atmosphere for married people without there spouses.

 

Whats the answer here?

Should I start going out without her?

Should I demand if she wants to stay married she not go out?

Should I demand a time curfew when she does go out?

How is the best way to handle this?

She seems to make things worse when I try to tell her what she can and cant do.

[dyermaker]

Dear Abdul Muhammad bin Jealuosheef,

 

Part of a marriage is trust, because trust is conducive to love. Yogi Berra once said, "if you come to a fork in the road, take it!"

 

You have a fork in the road of your marriage. I will outline for you both forks, and the post-fork analysis of your choices, in order to equip you on how to best follow brother berra's advice.

 

Fork #1 is the fork you're already leaning towards, so it doesn't require much of a pitch. First, you go out with her, sending a clear message, "You are my property, and I don't approve of you exiting the house of your master looking like that, or looking like anything but [ this ]. If you leave the home, you'll be leaving in my arms, just in case you choose to stray with your whorish eyes, I can slaughter them with the edge of my righteous sword. Additionally, you should start your DEMANDS. Primarily, demand a curfew, when you're off doing the mandatory offerings to the god of fidelity at the local motel, so that she will be IN BED, ASLEEP, NO TV, NO COOKIES before ten. Oh, and certainly make it evident that you will divorce her, cut off her hands, and hang her upside down outside your door if she continues to make this attempt at what she calls "fun"

 

Now, you need to wait until all forks have performed before calling the number or texting your vote, so please don't vote now, it won't count!

 

Fork # 2, and my personal favorite, is getting the hell over yourself. Primarily, you have to analyze your ability to trust your wife. You have to ask yourself the questions, do I trust her? do I trust her love for me? Do I ever have fun? Do I trust her friends? After you've asked yourself the tough questions, you need to act accordingly. If you don't trust her, you either end the marital commitment (and give back her dowry, it's only fair) or you communicate with her, isolating the issues in which your trust fails, and working to rebuild your marriage. Some members here often link to marriagebuilders.com, you might want to give them a shot. If you do trust her, prove it, and let her have some fun with her girls in 21st century free America, maybe while she's gone you can do some chores around the house, or write her a poem or something.

[Thinkalot]

Originally posted by mav2112

Should I start going out without her?

Should I demand if she wants to stay married she not go out?

Should I demand a time curfew when she does go out?

How is the best way to handle this?

She seems to make things worse when I try to tell her what she can and cant do.

 

I know you are stressed by this new behaviour. But- telling her what she can and can't do certainly won't help at all. Neither, will it help if you start to go out without her, just to spite her. Or if you make a demand that she not go out at all.

 

What I think might be helpful, is communicating your concerns to her in a non threatening way. Tell her why it bothers you, and that it is perhaps even an issue to do with you, but that nevertheless it upsets you, or makes you feel anxious. Don't blame or be angry. Just talk and air your feelings. She may be more receptive to listening.

 

Also, people change. You will both change many more times in your marriage. The key is adapting to the change. If she is going out with girlfriends just to dance and have fun sometimes, that's OK. Maybe just compromise on how often. And don't set a time curfew, but say you'd appreciate it if she isn't out all night, because you'd feel more comfortable.

 

And, maybe have some separate interests of your own too.

 

That said, make sure she is not doing this now, because she is not satisfied at home. Ask her why she is doing this? I would not like it if my partner frequently went out to clubs without me either...but sometimes would be OK. He would not mind me going out dancing with my girlfriends sometimes. Ask her how she'd feel if the roles were reversed. Perhaps she wouldnt mind, and has different expectations of what marriage means.

 

Bottom line. Talk. Find out what's happening. Tell her how you feel. Set boundaries that you both feel comfortable. We all have different standards and ideas. You need to find what suits you two.

 

But remember, you do not own your wife...or have the right to dictate what she can or can't do.You do have a right to air your feelings and hopes she considers them however.

[sportsloving]

Why can't you go out with your guy friends on the same night she is going out? Do you feel like you are being left behind when she goes out without you? Does she work or is she a house~wife? Are her friends married?

 

My girlfriends and I would try to get together twice a month, a time for us just to be us, not as part of a couple. Sure we would go to clubs and such, but we would maybe have a drink, dance in a group, or go to a movie or what not. We never went looking for men, we didn't do anything that would disrespect our spouses, we just needed some time for "us".

 

I wouldn't think a curfew is yours for the asking. She is an adult and she can choose when she needs to head for home. Maybe you two can agree to meet at a time for breakfast (one of those all night diners) after her time out so she can tell you what they were up to? My ex and I did this (pre~kids) and we had a blast laughing at folks who came stumbling in drunk or talking about who I had seen, where we went and who did what.

[mav2112]

Why can't you go out with your guy friends on the same night she is going out?

 

I can but she decides to go out at the last minute and a lot of the time its too late unless I go out alone.......which I can do if I am in the mood to.

 

 

 

Do you feel like you are being left behind when she goes out without you?

 

Yes, kind of...............I would feel bad if I did that to her.

 

 

 

 

Does she work or is she a house~wife?

 

She is a full time nurse................

 

 

 

 

Are her friends married?

 

 

No they are single and divorced................

[befuddled11]

Mav,

You have every right to be concerned here. There's many people out there, including myself, who believe that the "club scene" is not a place for a married person. It generally just leads to nothing but trouble. It's one thing for your wife to have friends and to have a life outside of your marriage....but hanging out at a "meat market" doesn't seem like a great place.

 

What age is your wife?

 

You certainly can't "stop" her from going. You can't "give her a curfew"......and trying to "get back at her" by you starting to go out to the bars with your guy friends just isn't going to prove anything.

 

Is this "bar thing with the girls" a relatively new behavior for her?

 

How is your marriage otherwise? Does she seem happy in the marriage? Any signs that she could be cheating? Any new changes in her appearance? (new wardrobe, suddenly started working out, etc). How is your sex life?

 

Are her friends single or married?

 

When she goes out, is it on the weekends? Does she stay out til the early hours of the morning?

 

Does she get drunk when out with "the girls"?

 

I'm not sure what the solution is, I'm afraid...other than telling her how you feel. Yes, trust needs to be there in a marriage..but when you notice your spouse begins to want to act "as a single person" and their behavior abruptly changes, that's a sign to be weary of.

 

Does she enjoy the attention she might receive when out at the bar with "the girls"? In other words, does she feel you're not giving her enough attention?

 

Does she feel "stuck" in the marriage and is looking for some excitement elsewhere?

 

Are these "new" friends, or long time friends? Are any of these girlfriends of hers, going through a divorce or recent split-up with a partner?

 

As old-fashioned as some might say it is, I don't believe married people need to be out at a bar without their spouse.....it's simply trouble looking for a place to happen........bars are notoriously nothing more than meat markets, where most people are looking to get picked up/pick someone up....there's almost always booze involved, inhibitions are lowered, people get tempted and do stupid things. It's not positive for the marriage.

 

Do you trust your wife? Any reason at all to suspect she's seeing someone else or interested in doing so?

 

Have you asked her what the big fascination is with going out to the bar ?

[Fedup&givingup]

I am, again, with Befuddled on this one. Nice answer, btw.

 

I don't think it's appropriate to be involved with the whole "club scene" once married. If it's done together, that's one thing. Plus the fact that you say her friends are available makes it even more of a threatening situation for your wife.

 

The "last minute" thing is just last minute to you. I'm sure your wife has planned the night out well in advance.

 

You've expressed your feelings to her about this, and she is doing it anyway. Here's something my father once told me (for all it's worth lol), and it's as simple as this...if you do something that is going to upset your spouse, then you just don't do it. It's not worth it. If they insist on doing it anyway, there IS a problem, point blank.

 

My take on things like this is an example of how your spouse is "cheating" you, not cheating on you, but she's cheating you.

[SuperSleuth]

Originally posted by Fedup&givingup

I am, again, with Befuddled on this one. Nice answer, btw.

 

I don't think it's appropriate to be involved with the whole "club scene" once married. If it's done together, that's one thing. Plus the fact that you say her friends are available makes it even more of a threatening situation for your wife.

 

My take on things like this is an example of how your spouse is "cheating" you, not cheating on you, but she's cheating you.

 

Okay, I think this is just a bunch B.S.

 

On the one hand, I *do* think it is a good idea for him to talk to her about it. NOT chastise her, mind you, but discuss what it is she enjoys about it so that he can understand her wish to go out and dance, etc.

 

And as a woman who likes to go dancing with her buddies periodically, and is in process of a divorce due to HIM cheating on ME while I mostly stayed at home behaving myself, I find it really offensive that people assume a woman is going to cheat just because she is out dancing and hanging out.

 

I'm not saying that isn't a possibility (cheating), just that she isn't any more likely to cheat dancing or otherwise. If she is going to cheat, she'll cheat with the hot guy she meets at the supermarket, too.

 

So cheating isn't the issue here... Respect for each other and trust is.

 

SS.

[Fedup&givingup]

I never said this woman was cheating, nor did I even imply it. I said this woman was cheating her husband-that does not mean she is cheating ON him. There are ways to cheat your spouse. Not listening to them and doing what you want to do regardless of they feel is one good example of that.

 

Respect and trust ARE the issue, correct. This woman doesn't have that for her husband since she's doing what she pleases against his wishes and feelings about the matter.

 

You are going out and having a good time at your husband's expense regardless of his feelings, but you are also divorcing. That wasn't mentioned in this scenario here.

 

I feel that his wife going out to a meat market with single, available friends, against his wishes is wrong and inappropriate.

[moimeme]

Sure we would go to clubs and such, but we would maybe have a drink, dance in a group, or go to a movie or what not. We never went looking for men, we didn't do anything that would disrespect our spouses, we just needed some time for "us".

 

If she were doing something like this, it might not be so bad. I don't honestly see what the charm would be in spending evenings at clubs with a bunch of available women but I suppose if that's all they ever do for 'fun' then she might not get many chances to see them.

 

I wouldn't want to do it, mind you. Maybe an after-work drink with the gals, but evenings out in bars - nah. I'd rather eat than drink; my style would be Sunday brunches. Don't suppose she'd accept that as a compromise, eh?

[befuddled11]

Originally posted by SuperSleuth

just that she isn't any more likely to cheat dancing or otherwise. If she is going to cheat, she'll cheat with the hot guy she meets at the supermarket, too.

 

Why be so offended at my opinion? Why take it personally? And of course, isn't your situation entirely different? I mean, you're going for a divorce...this guy is very much married.

 

just that she isn't any more likely to cheat dancing or otherwise. If she is going to cheat, she'll cheat with the hot guy she meets at the supermarket, too.

 

Now that's funny! Yeah, I'm sure at a grocery store, there's tons o' hunks...and everyone is dressed all sexy, the music is pumping, the booze is flying, there's sex in the air and everyone in the produce aisle is hoping to go home with someone LOLOLOL.

 

If a spouse wants to live the single life, they have no business being married. Aside from those going through (likely bitter) divorces, spouses who want to go out and have a good time dancing should go with their spouses..what the hell did they get married for if they want to live the single party life?

 

And the most important thing here is......her sudden behavior upsets him. That is the crux of the matter. When I was married, if my husband had told me nicely that something I did upset him or made him feel insecure or uncomfortable, out of love and respect for him, I'd have taken his feelings into account and I'd have at LEAST made a compromise, if not quit what I was doing that bothered him. That's called common courtesy. People don't enter into a marriage expecting their spouse is suddenly going to turn into a barfly. If this wasn't a behavior she had prior to marriage, he had every right to believe that was truly the way she was.......perhaps if she had been a barfly, he wouldn't have married her.

 

How would you feel, had you not found yourself married to a cheater, and your husband was not the type to go out dancing with women prior to your marriage...but during your marriage, he suddenly started going out with the guys to dance with women? Don't even TELL me you'd be hunky dory with it! LMAO

[sportsloving]

How would you feel, had you not found yourself married to a cheater, and your husband was not the type to go out dancing with women prior to your marriage...but during your marriage, he suddenly started going out with the guys to dance with women? Don't even TELL me you'd be hunky dory with it! LMAO

 

We don't know if she is going out to dance... they could be going to a bar, having a drink, talking and laughing and NOT paying attention to anyone else. The thing is, unless he asks her what she is doing, I doubt he knows either.

 

Just because you are married doesn't mean your life has ended... it does mean you adjust to the other. Yes she should show respect for his feelings IF he has made them clear to her that he is uncomfortable. BUT he should also tell her what makes him uncomfortable about the situation. But trying to impose a curfew on her, or saying if she wants to stay married she can't go... that isn't showing her respect or trust.

 

In all the times I went out with my friends, never once did it ever come to question if I had been faithful or not. He had trust in me, and there was no reason to think any differently.

 

I wonder if he is upset most that she is going out to the bars or the fact that she is just plain going out.

[NotaBadGuy]

Mav,

 

I am no rocket scientist or anything, but I do see some similarities to my former marriage. My ex began going out to the bar and would come home late at night. I worried but set no ultimatums becuase I knew that would just push her further away. I later discovered she was having more fun than she should, was setting up meetings with guys at the clubs, would often use the club scene as a decoy to go elsewhere, would plan these club trips on nights I was unable to go or would say it was a girls night out, would stay out way past closing time, would wait until the last minute to decide to go out, would always get agggrevated with me if I asked too many questions, would never want me to go, would often go to a city close but yet far enough away to club, and so on.

 

My point is that you do need to be aware of what is going on. I would not immediately jump to any brash decisions based on what I've read, but I would also not allow youself to be naive about the whole situation. I do believe that going out with people of the same gender is appropriate at times, but it should not be at the cost of the other persons feelings. I agree that clubs, especially, are not the best environment for married individuals. Bars are not as bad depending on the atmosphere. Just keep your eyes open is all I am saying.

 

I, too, never saw this action or activity from my wife at the time. My marriage went south very fast after she began this new venture. In my case, I think my wife began getting all kinds of attention in the clubs that she was not getting at home due to me being in school and she feel for the lines the sharks in those environments bait their victims, I mean women with. My wife at the time beleived everything she was told.

 

I am no slouch myself either. I am very driven and wanted to give her the world. But I had to put alot into my education (J.D.). In the end, I am now divorced and putting the pieces back together. But I will be a stronger and wiser man as a result.

 

Just keep your eyes open and love your wife unconditionally. If the frequency in which she does this is fairly limited (3x per month or so), then I would tell her to enjoy her girls nights out. You know your wife better than anyone on a neutral site such as this. And you know your marriage better than anyone else. Pay attention to the words of wisdom given on this forum, but also look in the mirror of your soul and of your marriage too. From there determine how sound the foundation and walls of your marriage truly are. There you will find the answers you ultimatley seek. But then again, this is just my opinion. Best of luck.

[mav2112]

Well thanks for the replys..........a lot made sense.I have to say that anyone who thinks going to the bars when married is a good thing then they just miss the point. I was single for years and believe me when I say I know exactly what happens in the bars, and its not good for relationships.

 

My wife tells me she doesnt dance with anyone so I believe her.

 

She really doesnt go out in a group but rather goes out with a single divorcee(recently) who she works with at the hospital.

 

Like I said before I really trust her but what hurts me the most is she knows it bothers me and she still does it. I think that is very inconsiderate.

 

If I ever thought this was going to be a problem I would have brought it up to the pastor when we were going thru our marriage counseling.

 

I am sorry if this is the wrong thing to say but I for one dont want to be married to someone who still feels the need to go out and party a lot. I can compromise and give a little slack but if it starts getting out of hand the enough is enough for me.

 

I already feel I am giving her the benefit of the doubt for if the roles were reversed I would have quit going out since it would be upsetting her( this is a fact).

 

Whe she goes out she stays out until about 1pm but once she didnt get home until 3 and once 5..............thats when I really got pissed.

 

I almost think she is enjoying the fact she is upsetting me somewhat and I am paying more attention to things............I used to be pretty laid back and not get to upset with things...........maybe I spoiled her is this regard.

 

She is 32 and I am 42.......maybe she is having midlife issues????All I know is that this is a new behavior for her.

[Fedup&givingup]

I don't think you should be laid back on this one. When you rightfully got upset about being out that late, you were telling her what the conditions are/were, so now she comes home by 1.

 

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this has affair written all over it.

[TazmaGurl]

I think that if it bothers you then she should accept it and work on doing it less often or not at all or include you.

 

When you marry someone you agree to be faithful, honest and understanding. You also are expected to listen to and respect each others feelings. If her going out without you makes you feel threatened or jealous or whatever, It is my opinion that she should give up her new found nightlife.

 

At least, thats what I would expect from my husband, and thats what I would do for him.

 

I'm one of those people who can't trust others, though. Perhaps my view is somewhat self-destructive (as I have been told by many, including therapists). So I really don't know how much of what I say you want to take seriously ^.^

 

 

Tazmagurl

[dyermaker]

I'd just like to say that the notion of demanding things because of love, or 'expecting' certain behaviors because of personal lapses in trust or insecurities is quite self-destructive to a relationship.

[meanon]

mav

 

I won't rehearse arguments others have already made but I just wanted you to know that in my experience there is absolutely nothing wrong with going to a bar when you are married, as Dyer said: it's all about trust. If you do not trust her there may well be a reason but I would advise you to try and find out what it is rather than simply concentrating on the issue of whether going to bars is wrong.

 

I have been with my husband for 17 years, I go to bars without him at least once a week and I have never had an affair. Two of my closest friends are also married and they are in the same position. We go to spend time with friends and have fun. That's it.

[Pyrannaste]

Do you have any female friend you can trust?

You could ask her to go to the same bar/club your wife goes to, and check on her -just *once*, not every time.

If you found out she does not anything she'd do in front of you when she is out alone, you'd probably relax. You might also want to know what kind of bar she goes to. I'd worry if she kept the place a secret. If it's the kind of bar one woman should not go alone for her own sake -like, a bar full of drunks, or where hookers hang out, or where a woman is likely to be molested, or a bar which has a bad reputation, you'd have every right to be upset.

 

Said that, I'm among those who don't see anything wrong to going to bars when married, unless

1) she's going alone with a *male* friend you are jealous of (not your case)

2)she wouldn't go to the same bar with you

3) she dresses sexier than she ever does when going out with you

4) she's going all evenings or every other evening (which is not, again, your case).

[Dug]

Personally......when it comes to going out clubbing and drinking.....I believe it is an indication that someone doesn't have anything better to do at home. Many of the bar flies are prowling and looking for a piece of a**. Men and alcohol are the perfect chemistry for propositions, and with the assumption that the women are also "looking" to be found. I presume you assume this, or you wouldn't be concerned. We are not talking about a women's card club here....this can be a relationship nightmare.....but.....your wife has to see and understand your concerns. You can't change her or set ground rules.

[sportsloving]

I have to say that anyone who thinks going to the bars when married is a good thing then they just miss the point.

 

I believe then that I am looped into this group. I didn't say it was good/bad or whatever, all I was merely trying to suggest is that there could be nothing more to it than her wanting to spend some time with friend(s).

 

I do however agree that if you have made your feelings known and she has decided to ignore you, she is being disrespectful. In not one of my cases of going out did my spouse ask that I not go, and if he had, I probably would not have gone.

 

I do not believe you should ever spy upon her or have someone else do it for you. That is just asking for more problems and a major one being a lack of trust. You have stated that you trust and believe what she tells you, so this is rather pointless.

 

As for her staying out til three or five am, unless she called to inform you of her whereabouts, I would say that you had a good reason to be upset. It is common courtesy to call when one is going to be later than planned and letting another know where you are.

 

I almost think she is enjoying the fact she is upsetting me somewhat and I am paying more attention to things............I used to be pretty laid back and not get to upset with things...........maybe I spoiled her is this regard.

 

Maybe in her own way she is trying to tell you something. It could be, and this is just a theory, but perhaps she feels you are too laid back ... meaning that perhaps she feels as if you are laid back due to a lack of caring. By getting you upset, you are forced to show you care. Again just my idea, and I have been known to be wrong.

 

I do wish you the best, and if this is something you continue to butt heads on, perhaps it is time to seek out counseling to find the root of the issue.

[Moose]

I haven't read all the posts on this thread, but.....My wife has a "Girl's night out" type activity that she goes on a couple times a month and then she goes out with her Sister-in-law once a week. I give her some money so when she does get a chance to get out and she finds something she likes she can buy it.

 

Granted she isn't going to a bar or a club...but I wouldn't say anything even if she did except, "Did you have a good time?". If she went to clubs on a regular basis like the situation here I would have to have a talk with her and tell her how it makes me feel. I don't believe in setting curfews for an adult or telling her what she can or can not do....but I do believe in taking other's feelings to heart and making sacrifises or changing habits to where feelings are spared and people can relax.

 

It is all about the trust...but as my wife said to me before....you have to want to be whooooed to be whooooed.

 

Does she want to be whooooed?

[Juggs]

My husband and I both go out periodically without each other.... To bars, friend's houses, clubs... etc.... Never once has either of us had an issue with it. My opinion (and you know what they say about opinions...) is that it is healthy for a couple to still maintain their individual interests as well as interests that are shared.

 

On the other hand.... If it does upset you that much then a compromise is required. Your feelings are your feelings and they should not be minimized or thrown to the side. As long as you are not approaching it from the direction of accusations or mis-trust then you should tell her you are not comfortable with her going to clubs with her single girlfriends. Maybe ask her if she would concider having her friends over your house for dinner or something if she needs time with her friends, and maybe that night you can go out and leave her and her friends alone at your place.

 

I know it means the world to me to maintain my "self". I don't ever want to just be my husband's wife..... I want to be 1 of 2 individuals participating in a marriage. The time I have away from my husband with my girlfriends is priceless to me. Not because I don't enjoy my husband's company but because it's *my* time. There are things about me that my husband just simply will never understand.... He's a guy, how can he? But my girlfriends know exactly where I am coming from. I would shrivel up and die if I could never go out and have fun with my girlfriends alone.

 

If you try and tell her what to do instead of talking to her and *asking*her to meet you in the middle somewhere, you will be attempting to control your wife or treat her as a piece of property. That may not be your origianl intent, but that's what it will be and I don't think she would appreciate that at all.

[EnigmaXOXO]

I’ve tried to put myself in your position, and even though my partner and I don’t engage in this kind of activity, I must admit I’d be a little concerned, too.

 

We know married couples who go out separately on the weekends and party, but admittedly, these people aren’t exactly happy and content with their relationships and partners at home. I know for a fact that both my partner and I would feel ‘hurt’ if the other suddenly started ‘stepping out’ on the weekends leaving the other home alone. And I’ll be D*AMED if I’d be some patsy, scrubbing floors and writing ‘love poems’ until five in the morning while my partner was out carousing the bars and meat markets with his single friend/s.

 

I don’t think it’s unfair to expect some kind of consistency when it comes to your partner’s behavior, attitude and personality. When we marry someone or enter into a committed relationship its with the mutual understanding that the person we know and love today will be the same person we wake up to tomorrow. Yes, people do change…but not always for the better.

 

I think it’s one thing if you knowingly enter into a committed relationship with someone who likes to go out and party. Those are the conditions you accept and compromise on from the onset. But it’s a whole different matter when someone suddenly decides to redefine those relationship boundaries without considering their partner’s feelings or how it will adversely affect the dynamics of that relationship.

 

We can use that old saw horse “trust,” but when you get right down to it, trust is rooted in our partner’s predictability, their consistency in action and behavior, and their ability to continually meet those expectations the relationship was founded on.

 

I believe you when you say that she would not like it if the situation were reversed. Unfortunately, that is usually the case and ‘double standards’ are the hallmark of disrespect. I suppose if you were spending your weekends at the local strip club with your single buddies (just enjoying drinks and conversation, of course) you might also expect that your dutiful wife stay home, finish up the chores and write you sweet ‘love poems’? And if she did…I doubt that you would respect her very much.

[Juggs]

Originally posted by EnigmaXOXO

I know for a fact that both my partner and I would feel ‘hurt’ if the other suddenly started ‘stepping out’ on the weekends leaving the other home alone. And I’ll be D*AMED if I’d be some patsy, scrubbing floors and writing ‘love poems’ until five in the morning while my partner was out carousing the bars and meat markets with his single friend/s.

 

......

 

I suppose if you were spending your weekends at the local strip club with your single buddies (just enjoying drinks and conversation, of course) you might also expect that your dutiful wife stay home, finish up the chores and write you sweet ‘love poems’?

 

 

I don't think she's out every weekend and I don't recall it being said she is out until the wee hours of the morning either...

 

Also.... She isn't going to Chip & Dale clubs, she's going out dancing with the girls. big difference between dance clubs and strip clubs....