whoknowswhattodo Posted April 22, 2011 Share Posted April 22, 2011 Its been 10 days nc and it doesn't seem like she is even thinking about me. Will she ever come back? I try not to think about it and I talked to some friends and they all say the same thing. "Its not a matter of if she will come back, its a matter of when and if you will take her back?" I would take her back because I gave her my heart and the time is killing me. I haven't ate in 4 days and I'm not hungry and I can't sleep. Is there any ideas of what will happen or how long? Is she gone forever? I hate this! Link to post Share on other sites
nlpman Posted April 22, 2011 Share Posted April 22, 2011 Hi Whoknowswhat, Im no expert, but Im in a very similar position and after reading a lot of posts on Loveshack the consensus seems to be keep the NC for at least a month, pref 3 months or even 6. You wont be in the right frame of mind to make another go at the relationship until you dont need her back (if you can understand that). Its a nightmare isnt it, not knowing what will happen. Read through the posts, especially on NC, the guys on here seem to know what they are talking about. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Hopeless Girl Posted April 22, 2011 Share Posted April 22, 2011 Hi Whoknowswhat, Im no expert, but Im in a very similar position and after reading a lot of posts on Loveshack the consensus seems to be keep the NC for at least a month, pref 3 months or even 6. You wont be in the right frame of mind to make another go at the relationship until you dont need her back (if you can understand that). Its a nightmare isnt it, not knowing what will happen. Read through the posts, especially on NC, the guys on here seem to know what they are talking about. Good luck why preferably 3 months? Link to post Share on other sites
Strength of Heart Posted April 22, 2011 Share Posted April 22, 2011 why preferably 3 months? Most people are still to emotional around the one month mark to think and act rationally with their ex's. I think six months is a much better amount of time. Depends on the person though. Link to post Share on other sites
collegeguy_24 Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 Stick to NC, because I know from personal experience. After she dumped me, I sold all my pride and dignity and started to make contact in the hopes of getting her back. In the end it didn't work. If you break NC now, you are giving up your pride and dignity as a man. Let her come to you, or you find someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
sabienne Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 It seems like from the way you worded your post that you expect nc to "bring her back". nc is not a magical tool designed to make your ex want you. It's designed to help you move forward with your life. Yes, lots of people have their ex's contact them during nc. Lots don't. What people are saying to you is stick it out for three months and it will stop hurting so much FOR YOU. Not that she'll come running back. I know it's hard to accept, but she hasn't contacted you for 10 days. She doesn't want to contact you. Deep down, When you think about it, you realize that's enough to let you know you need to heal to find a girl who does want to contact you Link to post Share on other sites
JasonRules Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 Its been 10 days nc and it doesn't seem like she is even thinking about me. Will she ever come back? I try not to think about it and I talked to some friends and they all say the same thing. "Its not a matter of if she will come back, its a matter of when and if you will take her back?" I would take her back because I gave her my heart and the time is killing me. I haven't ate in 4 days and I'm not hungry and I can't sleep. Is there any ideas of what will happen or how long? Is she gone forever? I hate this! You're feeling like this because you're going through withdrawal. You've conditioned yourself almost like a drug user is conditioned to need a drug. In your case, the "drug" is your ex. You miss her emotionally and this is very normal. You're still at the very early stages. It is difficult and many of us went through the same thing you're going through right now. Loss of appetite, lack of sleep etc etc. As time goes by you'll start getting better day by day. Eventually you'll reach a point where you don't feel pain anymore. I'm almost at 2 months NC and I don't feel any pain anymore. In fact, I have begun dating as well. What I did though to cope was I signed up for a gym membership and started going every single day for 2 hour workouts. By the time I got home, it was 8-9PM and I was simply too tired to think about my ex and would just eat and go to bed. I kept doing this until it became habit and it helped a lot. Now, 3 months into this I have actually become much stronger and more fit to the point where I look much better than I used to. This indirectly has caused many women to notice me, which helps overall. So, my advice to you is take the negative energy your ex left you with and turn all that energy into something positive FOR YOURSELF, just like I did. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Fufu Posted April 23, 2011 Share Posted April 23, 2011 Its been 10 days nc and it doesn't seem like she is even thinking about me. Will she ever come back? I try not to think about it and I talked to some friends and they all say the same thing. "Its not a matter of if she will come back, its a matter of when and if you will take her back?" I would take her back because I gave her my heart and the time is killing me. I haven't ate in 4 days and I'm not hungry and I can't sleep. Is there any ideas of what will happen or how long? Is she gone forever? I hate this! The truth is, no one will ever knows if she will come back. She chose to leave, remember this. Therefore, you don't have to choose to be stuck in the past. Your friends are right, it's not about if she will come back, it's about moving on and by then you will be able to think logically if this relationship is worth to relive or not. You will definitely say you want her back because right now you are still emotional and hurt badly overly by the break up. You need to eat, you are responsible and accountable for your own health and life. Grab some food, a little snacks also can, don't neglect your health even when you hit rock bottom in life. You need to find ways and means to pull yourself up. No body knows how long it will take for her to come back, she may or she may not, don't dwell over it. Focus on yourself, focus on moving on and be happy again. I like JasonRules's advice, sign up for gym membership or any other sports you like. Keep yourself busy. Link to post Share on other sites
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