:'(

[asternx]

before i say anything, i just want to say that i'm 17 years old and some people may think "oh she's too young to know about love and relationships", but i don't care what you think and i'm going to say what i want to say.

 

i met this guy in the summer of 2009 on an American summer camp and we instantly had a connection and we've been in an unofficial long distance relationship since then. i saw him for the first time in person since then only a couple of weeks ago, as i went to his home town for a week (in san diego). it was truly amazing, and it was like we weren't ever apart.

 

however on my last night in town, he sat me down and he told me that he no longer wanted us to be close, he no longer wanted us to talk as often as we do and he wants to move on and forget. i'm one of those people that gets attached so easily, so obviously when i saw him i became attached again. he said nothing about becoming casual friends or talking once a month like he does with all the other foreign people he met, but he wants to forget me, and attempt to erase the memories he as of me.

 

i was and still am heartbroken. since this a forum for that kind of thing, i want to know if anyone has any advice on how i can move on from someone like him. oh and since me coming back to london, he's tried to contact me in several ways but i've managed to put up a sort of barrier despite how hard it is.

 

if anyone reading this has any advice, no matter how harsh it may be, i would really appreciate someone trying to help me get through this.

[Professor X]

Well, I'm sure others have already told you, but the best way to move on is to stop any contact with the said person as well as deleting anything that might remind you of him (pictures, gifts, cards, etc').

 

Other than that, not a whole much that you can do.

Just give it some time (a lot of it).

[Joey7489]

Sorry to hear about this

The reality is you need to get rid of everything that reminds you of him, keep yourself busy, and eventually time will heal the wounds.

 

Good luck

[HeavenOrHell]

I don't agree that you need to get rid of every trace of him, don't chuck stuff away as you may wish you'd kept them when your heartbreak subsides. You can't pretend you and him didn't exist or matter, there will be memories and reminders and they're painful, but they help you grieve.

What worked for me after my ex left after nearly 20 years is no contact for a while so that I let go of my in love feelings for him, it gave me a chance to move on and rebuild my life, I spent time with friends and doing work I enjoy, I kept myself busy and fulfilled and I got there in the end and recovered, even though it was the worst time of my life.

Time doesn't heal as such, it's more that bit by bit you learn to let go and accept the situation and move forward, people can stay miserable for months (I did until I went NC) or years if they don't make the effort to move on.

You can do it

[Irishlove]

Since you are seventeen and you already recognize you get clingy too fast then maybe learn skills NOT to be that way. My first love (actually crush) I just had my first love at 39...go figure! I was seventeen. Even though I don't hold him in my heart like I did, I still remember him. I think about our good times. All you can do is let time take it's course but be careful you don't over look a good guy while you are mourning this one.

It's ok to cry.

Youtube this. Madea talks about relationships. Listen to ALL of it. You'll laugh and learn. Good luck. You have LOTS of great years and memories. I'm excited for your future.

[orangelady]

I feel for you. I think the best way as Professor suggested is to go NC. I tried it for a few weeks but failed because I was very down but I realized that it was all one sided love and it just is hard.....

 

If you ever feel down, just come on here and talk to us.