Author jaymz Posted April 5, 2012 Author Share Posted April 5, 2012 Quick update: met this girl at a friends wedding, she is absolutely beatufil, doesn't realise she is and seems really nice too. Hopefully get to see her later today, see what happens...! Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted April 6, 2012 Share Posted April 6, 2012 Best of luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 7, 2012 Author Share Posted April 7, 2012 Have been texting this girl. She is smart and funny. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 7, 2012 Author Share Posted April 7, 2012 jaymz: How can I say this with out sounding mean... because I can relate to the pain you have went through and are still experiencing.. but when will you stop posting here about this situation? I'm not telling you not to, it is probably therapeutic for you but in my opinion it seems like you will never move past it if you keep dwelling within it. Just my two cents. As always I wish you the best, cheers pal. Keep teling me your opionion, I need to hear it. I continue to post, maybe not as much, for the following reasons: (1) Its a complete story of my life during this difficult phase. It has prven invaluable for me to see how far I have got and to prove the STBXW letters are complete lies as I have recorded faithfully what occurs. (2) I havent found another thread which goes into detail about a journey from a BS point of view. There are plenty of threads from those that post aboit their lives and then nothing... some come back with updates but rarely. (3) I guess it is theraputic in some sense to me (4) I dont think it does stop me from moving on. Ending 15 years is going to take a while, not sure how long, but I am sure more than a year for me to truly get over. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted April 7, 2012 Share Posted April 7, 2012 It only takes as long as you make it take. Set Your mind to what you need to do to be happy every day! Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 7, 2012 Author Share Posted April 7, 2012 It only takes as long as you make it take. Set Your mind to what you need to do to be happy every day! That is a lesson hard learnt and even harder to follow, but well worth the effort. I feel much different about things this year so far compared to last year. Each day is getting better and happier for me. Link to post Share on other sites
robf1971 Posted April 10, 2012 Share Posted April 10, 2012 Have been texting this girl. She is smart and funny. Excellent!! You deserve this!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 10, 2012 Author Share Posted April 10, 2012 Thanks Robf. I had a weird dream last night: I went to the ex's house as normal to pick up kids, but she was naked and trying to fix things under the sink, dresser etc. She was angry at me for something but I dont remember now, in the dream I was just think "why is she doing this?", then I woke up. Link to post Share on other sites
worldgonewrong Posted April 10, 2012 Share Posted April 10, 2012 I had a weird dream last night: I went to the ex's house as normal to pick up kids, but she was naked and trying to fix things under the sink, dresser etc. She was angry at me for something but I dont remember now, in the dream I was just think "why is she doing this?", then I woke up. Makes me think of the Seinfeld 'pickle jar' episode. Link to post Share on other sites
elfman Posted April 10, 2012 Share Posted April 10, 2012 Wait, fix things? Under the sink? You mean to say she wanted to "fix" things with you by being naked and doing it under the sink? Or she was playing plumber and fixing the sink while naked? Weird dream... glad you woke up... E. Link to post Share on other sites
Jstub Posted April 10, 2012 Share Posted April 10, 2012 Thanks Robf. I had a weird dream last night: I went to the ex's house as normal to pick up kids, but she was naked and trying to fix things under the sink, dresser etc. She was angry at me for something but I dont remember now, in the dream I was just think "why is she doing this?", then I woke up. Have you been watching porn lately? hahha - I am sorry but I had to Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 11, 2012 Author Share Posted April 11, 2012 It was completely not sexual or pornographic, just really odd. She was fixing something, I dont know what, it certainly wasnt talk about our relationship! Anyone want to interpret that dream? Link to post Share on other sites
dreamingoftigers Posted April 11, 2012 Share Posted April 11, 2012 Thanks Robf. I had a weird dream last night: I went to the ex's house as normal to pick up kids, but she was naked and trying to fix things under the sink, dresser etc. She was angry at me for something but I dont remember now, in the dream I was just think "why is she doing this?", then I woke up. She's exposed herself for what she really is. It's turned out to be behind-the-scenes manipulative and downright odd. You know she's trying to do something that she thinks is important but it doesn't make any sense why she is going about it in such a blatant way. Plus she got new breasts so there's probably some curiosity there. That's my guess. Btw I like your thread. It's that little quiet treat the comes in my email that I set forever ago. It's nice to see the meandering path go through the process and onto a new life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 12, 2012 Author Share Posted April 12, 2012 Reason (5) cheer up DOT Thanks for the analysis, most is probably true except for the boobs, I have no interest in those as they probably look worse now she has made them bigger... House sale nearly done! Last of the queries resolved so should be getting the dates agreed next. Spent a fortune on clothes again but I feel better wearing them. Still sticking to my exercise routines and running, not lost much weight recently but am noticing the extra muscle and definition, just need to lose the beer belly and jowls and I would look much better. The girl is away on Monday so haven't been able to get a date yet, she has had problems with getting a babysitter. Should be able to get a date when she comes back, plus another 2 weeks of exercise would help too Link to post Share on other sites
K Os Posted April 14, 2012 Share Posted April 14, 2012 (edited) Your dream suggests you are ambivalent about track sports and need to sort out your pension arrangements. Actually just wanted to make the 1,000th post on your thread Edited April 14, 2012 by K Os 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 19, 2012 Author Share Posted April 19, 2012 18/04/12 19:00 Called and spoke to kids, STBXW wanted to talk after. She was nice and chatty on the phone: alarm bells didn't ring - I dont know why I keep thinking she wants to be ok?. First it was about my daughter, she has chicken pox. Then she asked about the house sale and I explained that just had last bit to do and then all the paper work is done and ready to be signed. She kept going on about I cannot sell house unless she signs, I told her I know that, and once the paper work is done she can counter sign... Then she told me that she wants me to contribute to the cost of her car. I told her no. She then started to go on about I never fill it with petrol, clean it, have it checked etc. I told her no and is there anything else? She blew up again accusing me of being unreasonable etc. Again I stopped her and said is there anything else? She said she would consider if I'm allowed the car anymore, I said ok and goodbye. Wasn't going to waste any emotional energy on arguing about this or point out that she has not contributed towards the mortgage, joint debts, house sale etc in a year. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 19, 2012 Author Share Posted April 19, 2012 Yesterday spent the day looking at more places to rent, haven't decided on anything yet but am getting an idea. Also bought a car, nothing special, cheap and space for kids Its registered and paid for in my parents name, so I still have no assets. Still not heard back from that headhunter, am thinking its a CV fishing exercise after all.... Link to post Share on other sites
robf1971 Posted April 20, 2012 Share Posted April 20, 2012 she has not contributed towards the mortgage, joint debts, house sale etc in a year. She'll find that out soon enough when that all goes back to you from the house sale proceeds. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 23, 2012 Author Share Posted April 23, 2012 She'll find that out soon enough when that all goes back to you from the house sale proceeds. The proceeds will pay off the debt, wont be anything left Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 23, 2012 Author Share Posted April 23, 2012 The STBXW text me other other night, said she was out with the eldest and it made sense if I wanted to talk to all 3 of them to call them tonight instead. I replied ok and kiss them goodnight from me and that I love them very very much. She said she would. It really, really upset me. Them out with him doing something and me not involved. Spent the evening with my brother and his girlfriend, did cheer up in the end.... Link to post Share on other sites
Steen719 Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 I know what you mean. I try really hard not to care that my son goes out to eat with his dad. I mean really, it is alright, but here I am, alone. We should all be out together. Good grief, this healing is taking a long time, right? (I know, it takes time) HUGS 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 23, 2012 Author Share Posted April 23, 2012 Healing IS taking a long time! But as others have said, 15 years for me will take a while to get over... And 22? years for you?... Its not going to be soon enough for us!!! NC is so much easier. If I don't know what they are doing then I don't think about it. LC kills me sometimes. {{HUGS}} 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jaymz Posted April 23, 2012 Author Share Posted April 23, 2012 That job the headhunter called me for? It turns out they are recruiting internally now. Hmmm CV fishing? This is going to be a crap week! Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 You can tell her to stop telling you what she is or isn't doing. If you don't want to hear about her social life then tell her so! Good job on the prior situation of not feeding into her drama that she intends to tell you about. She does it so you might fix it. That's for HER to do. Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 That job the headhunter called me for? It turns out they are recruiting internally now. Hmmm CV fishing? This is going to be a crap week! Stop thinking such negative thoughts... They do manifest as negative energy growing bigger. Think positive thoughts and take action on THAT! Look for other jobs now! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts