Author justagirrl Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 wow. almost texted him. not cool at all this is harder than i thought Link to post Share on other sites
geegirl Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 You know what's even harder -- breaking NC, feeling rejected and starting NC all over again. Keep NC and your pain is temporary as it will ease if you just give yourself a chance. Break NC and you ignite your pain over and over again. You want to ease your discomfort. He can't comfort you because he is your source of pain. Choose wisely. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justagirrl Posted April 28, 2011 Author Share Posted April 28, 2011 Thank you.. I'm trying so hard to keep myself busy, so I can avoid thinking about it but it's always in the back of my mind =/ Link to post Share on other sites
hurtex Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I can't do this either... this is so painful. I can't contact him because I know that if he totally denies me I will be even more hurt... and I don't know if I can handle that. But each day I don't hear from him doesn't get better.... time isn't healing. I don't know what to do. Link to post Share on other sites
geegirl Posted April 28, 2011 Share Posted April 28, 2011 I can't do this either... this is so painful. I can't contact him because I know that if he totally denies me I will be even more hurt... and I don't know if I can handle that. But each day I don't hear from him doesn't get better.... time isn't healing. I don't know what to do. Of course it is painful. It's normal to feel this way. It gets worse before it gets better. You must not give into your pain because the alternative is no better, it's even worse. The thing about NC, when the pain is at its worse and you feel like there is no hope, you must keep going. What are you doing with your time? Sitting and sulking and counting the days he is not contacting you or filling it up with everything and anything? Each day you don't hear from him, it doesn't get better? Of course you feel that way. It's because the finality and the reality is slowly setting in. It's all part of the NC process -- the grieving, the denial, the healing, etc. What you are feeling is normal. It is not an indication that NC is not working or you are not making progress. Break-ups are painful. You are going through every step every other person suffering a broken heart has gone through during the course of NC. Keep going. Link to post Share on other sites
reallyconfused2542 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 hey justa! i though you took his number out of your phone...thought you were in this together with me. were almost done with 2 days! Link to post Share on other sites
reallyconfused2542 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 i just saw your post about the txt last night, hey at least you got something from him. now just do NC until then.. you have a set date so at least you can go by that. if things don't change after that then time to say goodbye Link to post Share on other sites
hurtex Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Thank you Geegirl.... I know this is why this forum helps. It makes me realize I'm not alone in my pain. I don't sit around and sulk that's the problem. With everything I do, and I try to stay SO busy, I can't get it out of my mind. I'm a teacher and I tear up in class. I just need to get it out of my mind. My friends came over the other day and once they left I went hysterical. The second I'm alone I'm a mess. I think I've probably got other issues going on. I don't know. I just don't want to give up the pain because that does mean that I'm healing. And that scares me that it means it's over. I don't know if I'm ready to accept that. Link to post Share on other sites
reallyconfused2542 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 i just started reading this book called attached. you should check it out...you can download a free sample of the first chapter on kindle Link to post Share on other sites
hurtex Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 just sent it to my kindle... I'll check it out thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Author justagirrl Posted April 29, 2011 Author Share Posted April 29, 2011 im gonna read it too!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author justagirrl Posted April 29, 2011 Author Share Posted April 29, 2011 hey justa! i though you took his number out of your phone...thought you were in this together with me. were almost done with 2 days! I did take it out -____- i just know his number by heart...the thought of texting him crossed my mind tho it's harder than i thought i'm in this with you! Link to post Share on other sites
reallyconfused2542 Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 ive been thinking about doing it all day.thank god its out of my phone and i don't know it by heart. and anyway aren't all you young kids not supposed to know any numbers?its the digital age where you just put a pic next to the name or scan a barcode Link to post Share on other sites
Infomercials Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Hey guys, Sounds like we're right around the same place. This is day 3 of NC for me! It's been the hardest thing, but everyone keeps saying it gets better! Stay strong...I know the few times I've broken NC before just made everything worse. Felt better for a minute, than so much worse after that... Link to post Share on other sites
lonelyandsick Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 I am going to begin NC tomorrow. It will be so, so hard. I feel like I have a heard time breathing constantly. Yuck. I blocked him from my IM chat list, deactivated my entire facebook and right now I'm looking into how to block websites I know I can check up on him on. Link to post Share on other sites
Fufu Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 NC gets easier, believe me Link to post Share on other sites
hurtex Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 I did take it out -____- i just know his number by heart...the thought of texting him crossed my mind tho it's harder than i thought i'm in this with you! Ugh I know!!! me too! Like it's not memorized and I can't just punch in the numbers... ugh. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justagirrl Posted April 29, 2011 Author Share Posted April 29, 2011 I am going to begin NC tomorrow. It will be so, so hard. I feel like I have a heard time breathing constantly. Yuck. I blocked him from my IM chat list, deactivated my entire facebook and right now I'm looking into how to block websites I know I can check up on him on. Stay NC, you're gonna feel so much better and won't have the stress of getting hurt again...and you'll have more power if you do so. I'm learning that..slowly but surely Link to post Share on other sites
Author justagirrl Posted April 29, 2011 Author Share Posted April 29, 2011 ive been thinking about doing it all day.thank god its out of my phone and i don't know it by heart. and anyway aren't all you young kids not supposed to know any numbers?its the digital age where you just put a pic next to the name or scan a barcode DON'T DO IT. seriously, don't. we're doing so well! Link to post Share on other sites
lonelyandsick Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Day one of NC and... I got an email from his mother this morning. Telling me how great of a person I am and how much she will miss me. I replied. This makes it much harder. Sigh. Link to post Share on other sites
hurtex Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 ha I just emailed his mother saying how I'm sorry I hurt him before and I understand now due to my hurt and how amazing a son he is. I told her that she raised him well and he deserves someone who makes him happy whether it's me or not :/ Link to post Share on other sites
hurtex Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 I mean how amazing a person he is. Link to post Share on other sites
Author justagirrl Posted April 29, 2011 Author Share Posted April 29, 2011 Day one of NC and... I got an email from his mother this morning. Telling me how great of a person I am and how much she will miss me. I replied. This makes it much harder. Sigh. That was nice of her. From this point on, NC...i'm having a lot of trouble with it myself, hang in there we're all in this together Link to post Share on other sites
MissMoni Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 I am at Day 10 NC after making it to 56 days and breaking it...let's hope I can stick with it this time, lol. We can do it guys!! They don't deserve to know what's going on in our lives. Link to post Share on other sites
hurtex Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 I am at Day 10 NC after making it to 56 days and breaking it...let's hope I can stick with it this time, lol. We can do it guys!! They don't deserve to know what's going on in our lives. If you don't mind me asking... what happened when you broke contact?? Link to post Share on other sites
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