stuckonyou Posted April 29, 2011 Share Posted April 29, 2011 Hi, I am in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend of 5 years. We were living close-by for more than 4 years and I moved to a different country only 6 months back to study. I deeply love my boyfriend, we have had our good and bad times but right now everything's fine and intend to marry him if all goes well. Before I moved, my boyfriend and I had a very good sexual relationship. And it is the first time in so many years that I have been away from him. Two weeks back I had a class get-together after which I went to a club with a couple of friends. I had a few drinks and danced with a couple of guys (nothing vulgar/erotic, just simple dance). However, I met this guy who's from my country and so we talked a bit and it turned out he knew someone I knew too. So after we were well-acquainted I agreed to dance with him. It was OK initially until he suddenly started to feel me up and started kissing me on my neck and ear. I told him I was uncomfortable and left him and went back to my friends. After some time he came again, apologised and requested for 'just a dance'. We danced and talked a bit when he mentioned he'd like to keep in touch with me. I said I have a boyfriend and I am not interested. He said he has a girlfriend too who he plans to marry later this year (it was a lie, a little google search later told me he's married). To cut the long story short, I shirked this guy off 4 times and pretty rudely. He still came around again and thrust his phone number in my hand saying 'this is my number, I like you and want to keep in touch with you only as 'friends' . I threw his number away and stuck to my friends all night. He didn't give up and came to ask me after a few minutes if I threw his number away. I shirked him off again but he still had the guts to come and tell me before leaving that its my 'choice' and that I should think about it. Now, don't get me wrong, I absolutely hate these stalker-type guys. My problem is that ever since that night I can't help thinking about the way he touched and kissed me. I hate to admit it but I enjoyed those few seconds with him and found it very difficult to get away from him (even though I managed to do so pretty quickly). My boyfriend knows everything about this and says he understands that its natural since I have been sexually inactive for quite a while. What I want to know is how do I stop myself? I know its just physical and my hormones are taking over my thoughts but I absolutely hate myself when my mind takes that direction especially because he was married and much older (I am 26, he's 37) than me. I feel icky and yet can't stop fantasizing about him. I usually don't go to clubs that often and never get intimate with other guys. I just love dancing and having a good time with my friends. I've promised myself I'd never dance with another guy(stranger) again. But this situation is driving me crazy. I am super-distracted and find it difficult to concentrate on my studies. My boyfriend and I have cyber-sex but its not helping in this case. Link to post Share on other sites
loverboy1984 Posted April 30, 2011 Share Posted April 30, 2011 first of all I would like to applaud what you did. Me and my gf are in the same situation as you but she kissed the guy and even though I didnt give her a hard time and forgave her, she broke up with me. I respect yourself control. Just keep in tough with your bf and talk about fun sexy thing and look forward to each other. Talk on webcam and look sexy for each other, send him stories and letters. In the meantime masterbate or something to get out the urge. Link to post Share on other sites
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