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No one compares to her


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I've known a certain girl for several years who is an incredible person. For a while we were just casual friends who occasionally worked together in a few plays. We quickly realized that we had many common interests and clicked really well. Eventually, I started to become attracted to her, so I manned up and asked her on a date. She declined, but it didn't affect our friendship, in fact we've been closer the last few years since I asked her out. I was really into her at the time, but after getting rejected I got over it pretty quickly.

 

You might call me a chump for sticking around her as her friend, but I've been out with plenty of girls since I asked her out. I haven't thought about her sexually in a very long time, but there's still something weird about my feelings for her. The girls I've seen the past few years have been great and very pretty and I had feelings for them...but not like this girl. They didn't strike me the same way she did or share incredibly rare similarities. I want to let this girl go, but there have been too many things between us that I just can't ignore. Like, when I was a little younger (and nerdier), I got a small tattoo of my favorite quotation from my favorite novel. Guess who got the exact same tattoo? That's right - my friend. When she got it, she had never seen mine. After showing me her's I showed her mine and we were both shocked. It's a pretty obscure quotation too that not many people recognize.

 

Things like that make it hard for me to accept that she's not right for me and move on. When I was dating the other girls, I was hoping I'd feel something more so one of them could take her place, but it never happened. I've told her what a beautiful person I think she is, and how I'll always be there for her if she ever needs, whether she's a lover or a friend. I don't know the extent of her feelings, but she greatly admires my creativity and artistic pursuits and finds me to be very special, but obviously not someone to love.

 

I'm not on here in desperation. I'm very content with my life, including my relationship with her. She makes me so happy even as a friend. I'm just confused about what I feel. I want to eventually find someone whom I feel stronger for than her, but I don't know if that'll ever happen. She seems perfect for me in so many ways but she apparently isn't.

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