jjhung Posted April 10, 2004 Share Posted April 10, 2004 My boyfriend hooked up with his ex two months ago and we are now into the third week of our one month cooling off period. He asked me beginning of this week if he breaks all contacts with her will I be willing to forget all that happened in the last few weeks. Today is Sat. and she went to his place last night and stayed. She's been there at least the first weekend we were apart. But he told me he is so conflicted since he has such a good time when he sees me but also when he sees her. Just want to know if anyone else has similar experience where you have an ex and current g/bf you have to choose from. I want the view from his/her perspective since all I see here are mostly the dumpee postings. Link to post Share on other sites
sami Posted April 10, 2004 Share Posted April 10, 2004 Choose whomever your heart is telling he is the best of them for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Miss_Prolixity Posted April 10, 2004 Share Posted April 10, 2004 Hello Jjhung, I really don't have any advice on what you should do, because that's up to you. But, I will say this, it sounds to me that your boyfriend is wanting to have his cake and eat it too. You stated, that he's willing to break all contact with his ex, yet she's at his house this weekend. Sometimes actions speak louder than words. Why would you want a man who is disrespectful and broke your trust? A man who is truly sorry and has a contrite heart would earnestly TRY to salvage his relationship and would put a full effort into making it work. Something he hasn't provided (based on the information you've given). I am sorry that you are going through this. It would be definitely painful. But sometimes we need to reassess our boundaries in relationships and stick to them. Link to post Share on other sites
JustHot Posted April 14, 2004 Share Posted April 14, 2004 If you want him back, don't chase. In other words, let his dumbass be with the ex for the time being. If he doesn't have the choice of you waiting on the sidelines or calling to let him know you're a great girl, he will get agitated and you will seem more appealing. There's a reason they broke up in the first place, and he's too immature to know what he wants if he has a choice. Make the choice for him. Stop contact and tell him you need some time to think. Then look hot when you know you're going to run into him, if that's an eventuality. Make him want you, AND the most important thing. BE CONFIDENT! They always want what they CAN'T have and men are made to pursue. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jjhung Posted April 14, 2004 Author Share Posted April 14, 2004 He is back alright. She decided to get out. But he needs time to mourne and grieve that relationship we are not seeing each other for a while. Last night I kind of "interrogate" him about a lot of questions in my mind. Right now I have a very strong feeling towards just being friends. At one point he was willing to let the relationship go because he wanted to see how it would pan out with her when I wanted a one month break. It is that willingness that now makes me mad. Of course I am saying it now because we saw each other for 30 mins. last night and then talked for 2 hrs on the phone afterwards. Link to post Share on other sites
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