boyfriend being a jerk..please help..

[sweetpea69]

Ok ..I wrote a post before about my boyfriend not showing interest in me anymore..well to update all of you I'll tell you a little story...Today my boyfriend and I were suppose to do some things together (just the 2 of us). Well to make a long story short my boyfriend is always making plans to do things with me but he always backs out of them to do stuff with his friends or he says well we can do whatever but we HAVE to be over at Jays(his friends house) at a certain time so I feel like he is rushing through doing stuff with me. Anyways today I kind of put my foot down and I was like well no we made plans so we are not going to Jays house..anyway he turned all nice and loving and hes like well how about we go to jays tongiht and tomorrow will be a day just for us...and I am like well ok...because he was being all sweet about it. So we ended up going to Jays house and he was sweet to me the whole time..well when it was time to leave (because he had to drive me somewhere that I had to be at a certain time) he said bye to the guys and then he decides to lean up againts the wall and start talking again..when we FINALLY left he demanded that I drive (HIS car) and I said that I don't want to because I am not good at driving his car (its standard). ANyway while I was driving I guess I put my foot too hard on the break (they are different than mine) and hes like god learn how to drive...blah blah I am surprised your brakess aren't wrecked and all this stuff..so I was like well then you drive I didn't want to drive in the first place. and hes like too bad..I just didn't say anything back because I was ready to cry...do you think I should put up with this??

[midori]

Originally posted by sweetpea69

...do you think I should put up with this??

 

Do you?

 

The fact that you've come to this site to convey your story ought to tell you that this is unacceptable. Why not ask a friend or family member, someone who knows your bf? Perhaps because you know what anyone -- friend or stranger -- would say? And perhaps because you know that, despite the fact that his behavior is unacceptable, you're not prepared to end things with him? If you talk to a friend or family member, they're going to expect you to break up with him, or at a minimum insist that you insist he change his ways.

 

No one deserves to be treated with disrespect, as you have been by your boyfriend. Apparently you're not clear on this point -- why? Would breaking up with him be so bad? Is the thought of being without a boyfriend so bad that even though yours is disrespectul, puts his friends before you, manipulates you, and doesn't care if he hurts your feelings, you'll stay with him?

 

So, no, I don't think you should put up with it. I'll bet that deep down you don't think you should put up with it either. Are you going to put up with it?

[Darkangelism]

If you are not happy then do not stay.

[ThisGirlNameKD]

If you didn't feel comfortable driving the car, you shouldn't have drove the car. He just would have been upset about it. He would have gotten over it. You put yourself and others in danger when you operate things you're not experienced in. As far as him being with his friends go, a guy does need time to hang out with his friends. Could it be that you want all of his time? Or that you want him to be with you at the same time that he's with his friends? People don't "always" do things. I'm pretty sure there were times you both made plans and he didn't change then to be with his friends. Now if he has a tendency to do that, it maybe because you allow him to do it, just like you allowed him to talk you into driving his car when you weren't comfortable doing it. You make it sound as if you make more compromises in the relationship than he does. I'm not saying you don't. You maybe be finding yourself in a 70-30 relationship with you giving more. If you find yourself giving more, tell him about it. If things don't change, you do have the right to leave the relationship for something more sharing.