advice.

[suruj]

I was dating a woman for 5 years, i was very in love with her, upto now there is still feelings for her. Things have somewhat changed. On Valentines day i proposed to her. She started crying, her answer was not "Yes" or "No", she needed time to think about it. I said o.k. and tried to let her have her space. The keyword is "Tried" I was very in love with her so i called her every night. (I know, i know, stupid mistake.) A few weeks back i got a e-mail from her co-worker saying that they had sex 3 times, keepin mind, while she was "trying" to figure us out. We were not "together" or so to speak, during her relationship with her co-worker. I confronted her with the e-mail message and said it was true. I really want to hate her but i can't. What is it i am feeling towards this woman?

 

I thought we were mesnt to be.I know that everyone has those feelings in the beginning, but this was different. I thought about a life of love and commitment to this woman.

 

Now she wants to be friends because she feels that i am not mentally challenging her. She is not physically attracted to me as well. Although, I avidley workout.

 

Please help me.

[Tony T]

If you ask a woman to marry you after five years of dating and she tells you she has to think about it, that VERY CLEARLY MEANS NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!

 

When a person knows someone really well and is in love with them and wants to spend the rest of their lives together, they do not hesitate in saying yes. We are talking almost SEVEN MONTHS since Valentine's Day in the United States. Of course, you may be in another country and you may celebrate this on a different date, I don't know. But it is never necessary to give someone months and months to decide whether they want to marry you.

 

During the time this lady was making you her fool by keeping you on the line for an answer, she was out sleeping with other men. Perhaps this was part of her decision making process (I do not know your culture), but my opinion is that she is someone you would never want to marry and you should be celebrating that you have gotten her out of your life. I know it hurts. You loved her enough to ask her to marry you but the feelings weren't mutual. That hurts like hell. But when you find out that information, you just cut your losses and move on. God seems to have been on your side here. She could have married you and then taken a good portion of your money.

 

She now says you are not physically attractive to her or mentally challenging. Well, I personally find HER repulsive in every sense of the word. You should be PROUD not to be attractive to someone of her calibre of low-class humanity.

 

I am personally angry at this lady for stringing you along and for her behavior. She is dishonest, has no morals, ethics or principles. She showed her butt and I hope you can forget her really fast because she doesn't deserve your time.

 

This lady wants to be friends??? That makes me sick to my stomach. I would rather be friends with Saddam Hussein than with her. At least Saddam has let the world know he's a two-faced lying scumbag...this lady is one big phony!!!

 

I hope you will understand she is no friend of yours. I am just so very sorry it took you so long to find this out. Not only does she not know what friendship is, but she doesn't know much about honesty, kindness, respect, consideration, loyalty...and all the other things that being a decent human being is all about.

 

You don't need to hate her, as you implied in your post, you just need to stay away from her and all people like her. My computer screen is starting to smell foul because I am writing about her so I must quit and spray the room with disinfectant.

 

Please heal from this and move on. She is nobody you want to burden your brain or your heart thinking about. Please forgive the foul odor of this post.

[billy the kid]

find someone new!!!!!or get on the next survivor show just quit wasting your time on something you can't win.

I was dating a woman for 5 years, i was very in love with her, upto now there is still feelings for her. Things have somewhat changed. On Valentines day i proposed to her. She started crying, her answer was not "Yes" or "No", she needed time to think about it. I said o.k. and tried to let her have her space. The keyword is "Tried" I was very in love with her so i called her every night. (I know, i know, stupid mistake.) A few weeks back i got a e-mail from her co-worker saying that they had sex 3 times, keepin mind, while she was "trying" to figure us out. We were not "together" or so to speak, during her relationship with her co-worker. I confronted her with the e-mail message and said it was true. I really want to hate her but i can't. What is it i am feeling towards this woman? I thought we were mesnt to be.I know that everyone has those feelings in the beginning, but this was different. I thought about a life of love and commitment to this woman. Now she wants to be friends because she feels that i am not mentally challenging her. She is not physically attracted to me as well. Although, I avidley workout. Please help me.

[Deejette]

Sometimes we want something so badly we ignore all the warning signs on the highway to our goal. In this case, you probably weren't really reading a lot of the signals she was sending to you up to the time when you asked her to marry you. She was probably cheating on you even before you found out about the co-worker incident. But because you needed for someone to be in your life, you just ignored the signs.

 

If you ask a woman to marry you after five years of dating and she tells you she has to think about it, that VERY CLEARLY MEANS NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!! When a person knows someone really well and is in love with them and wants to spend the rest of their lives together, they do not hesitate in saying yes. We are talking almost SEVEN MONTHS since Valentine's Day in the United States. Of course, you may be in another country and you may celebrate this on a different date, I don't know. But it is never necessary to give someone months and months to decide whether they want to marry you. During the time this lady was making you her fool by keeping you on the line for an answer, she was out sleeping with other men. Perhaps this was part of her decision making process (I do not know your culture), but my opinion is that she is someone you would never want to marry and you should be celebrating that you have gotten her out of your life. I know it hurts. You loved her enough to ask her to marry you but the feelings weren't mutual. That hurts like hell. But when you find out that information, you just cut your losses and move on. God seems to have been on your side here. She could have married you and then taken a good portion of your money. She now says you are not physically attractive to her or mentally challenging. Well, I personally find HER repulsive in every sense of the word. You should be PROUD not to be attractive to someone of her calibre of low-class humanity. I am personally angry at this lady for stringing you along and for her behavior. She is dishonest, has no morals, ethics or principles. She showed her butt and I hope you can forget her really fast because she doesn't deserve your time. This lady wants to be friends??? That makes me sick to my stomach. I would rather be friends with Saddam Hussein than with her. At least Saddam has let the world know he's a two-faced lying scumbag...this lady is one big phony!!! I hope you will understand she is no friend of yours. I am just so very sorry it took you so long to find this out. Not only does she not know what friendship is, but she doesn't know much about honesty, kindness, respect, consideration, loyalty...and all the other things that being a decent human being is all about. You don't need to hate her, as you implied in your post, you just need to stay away from her and all people like her. My computer screen is starting to smell foul because I am writing about her so I must quit and spray the room with disinfectant. Please heal from this and move on. She is nobody you want to burden your brain or your heart thinking about. Please forgive the foul odor of this post.