Should I see what happens with this relationship?

[dlb311]

I met a guy about 5 months ago. We have been talking ever since. The first month we went out a couple times but he got all weird and said he is trying not to like me. I was like umm okay. So I pulled away and just acted like his friend. Then my ex-boyfriend of 2 years came back after 4 months apart. He said he made a big mistake and I thought I was going to marry this man. So I gave him another chance. We were together for 3 months. During it all I continued to talk to this guy let call him Joe. We would chat everyday at work on the internet and talk every so often out side of work and I even went and hung out with him and his friends. I had a feeling he was probably upset he missed his chance since I was no longer available. But he started dating someone else for about a month of that time. And we became good friends talking about each others relationship and stuff. Then the girl he was dating left and well my ex and I broke up again.

This time I know I don't want the ex back and a day after we broke up Joe asked if I had anyone in mind I wanted to date? I said umm well just going to take it easy right now. Then a week later he (joe) asked me to the movies. I went thinking he was just being friends. But he didn't make a move on me so I left thinking yes we are going to just be friends. I like him he fustrates me he kids with me all the time but that is a sign of liking someone I would think. Well anyway that Friday he asked me and my friends to come out and hang with him. So we did. I could tell him was in to me a little well alot.

 

Then the next week he asked me to hang out with him everynight that week but had plans so I couldn't. Then he asked me to hang out with him this past weekend one night. So Saturday I went to his place and we went to dinner and then went back to his house and had some drinks and just talked all night. It was fun! I probably drank to much. But I was talking up a storm. I had a really good time. Then it was getting late he and he said for me to stay since I live far from him. So I laid down on the couch next to him and he then said lets go to bed. So we went and I don't remember how it happened but he started making out for a long time and it was so much fun. Nothing else just made out. Then we feel asleep I woke up and didn't know how to act so I got dressed and left. I said bye but he stayed in bed as I walked out the door. And he said to call him to make sure I got home okay. So I did. He asked if everything was okay I said yes. he then texted me all day making sure everything was okay. I told myself not to get involved with him. Even though I know I like him. So today he has been instant messaging me. Saying I tried to rape him and I was violating him. He said he was kidding really because I didn't. But he is joking about it still. Really if you didn't want a girl to kiss you why let her sleep in your bed. He just said now I am just teasing you. I like him I am so mad at myself.

I know I just got out of a relationship but my heart is no longer attached to it at all.

And I know he likes me I know this but I am scared of getting hurt again. And he will say at times how he likes being alone and he isn't in for a relationship. And I believe him and that is where I was. and well still should be. But my feelings seem to be getting very strong for him.

I need advice???Should I walk away from this should I talk to him..should I go with the flow. he mentioned how he wanted to hang out again. And he contacts me everyday..... I told him that I know that he trys not to let people in even when he wants to and he said def. that is how he is. I am so confused because I kind of want to see where this will go.

[MustBeGoingCrazy]

It sounds to me like you just need someone to agree in the direction you want, personally

 

He sounds like a great guy, and is likely joking as he was insecure after the fact. He was probably expecting you to stay for a little while, and then got weirded out that he *didn't* at least walk you to the door, and that it seemed as if you weren't alright with everything. He probably felt guilty about things, felt as if he took advantage of you, and this joking was probably his way of dealing with it...

 

 

IMO, tell him how you feel Him asking if you were planning to date anyone wasn't just him inquiring for the sake of discussion, coming from a guy, we typically don't do that. I would guess that he was "prospecting" to see how open you would be to dating, and from the story, he is very interested...

 

It seems as if you both seem to have been through similar situations as of late, and it sounds like you all have a lot more in common than what you talked about. Also, you two seem really comfortable around each other, able to talk for hours, hang out with others' friends, etc. So just go for it, if it's where you want to be

 

Yes, you are opening yourself up to possible hurt, but it's one of those "better to loved and lost then never to have loved at all" situations. (I'd rather have loved and lost, personally)

[dlb311]

thanks for you input.. I want to say something but really everytime before when I would bring it up he would get all weird like I was pressuring him. He would tell me I asked the weirdest questions. I think he is insecure about alot of things. I am insecure in certain areas also But I say straight out. I told him I enjoyed the kissing. he then asked me to come out Wendesday. But I always go out to see him and he hasn't once come out here to see me. So I wont go.

I can tell he likes me but just not sure were exactly he wants to take this. I guess I will see if it comes up. He asked if I told me friends. he is weird?

Anyway thanks for the advice I know you are right. Sometimes you just can't fight it. Though I wish I could because I would enjoy just doing my thing but I met him and I really enjoy his company and not sure where else it could go but it scares me!

thanks again.

[dlb311]

Hi,

 

So things have gotten a little interesting. Still not sure where to take this. So yesterday we where IMing each other all day long while both at work like usual. And he said:

I SEE YOU AS A TOTAL MOTHERLY TYPE GIRL.....LIKE YOU SEEM LIKE YOUD BE GOOD MARRIED WITH A CHILD AND A SUBURBAN...AND GOING TO SOCCER PRACTICE WITH A HAT ON AND CAPRI PANTS..... I ONLY SAY SQUARE CUZ YOU APPEAR THAT WAY NOW...AND I CAN TOTALLY SEE YOU LIKE THAT LATER ON LIFE

YA, YOU SEEM VERY MOTHERLY, VERY VERY MOTHERLY, I MEAN WARM....AND LIKE CARING...YOU SEEM LIKE A MOTHER ALREADY... I CANT EXPLAIN IT.....NOT AT ALL BUT...YOU DONT SEEM LIKE A PARTY PERSON.....JUST A STAY AT HOME-FUNNER TYPE MOTHER

IN MY OPINION ITS GOOD, BECAUSE......YOUR NOT A BAD PERSON...YOUR MORE OF A WARM CARING TYPE PERSON.....I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND ME

YOUR A GOOD PERSON...NEVER IN TROUBLE .....NEVER CAUSING PROBLEMS...YOU SEEM JUST LIKE A MOTHER WOULD...YA KNOW I THINK I SAY THAT CUZ I THINK MY MOM WOULD HAVE BEEN A LOT LIKE YOU WHEN SHE WAS YOUR AGE

SO THATS WHY MY SITUATIUON IS WEIRD WITH YOU

LIKE WHEN I THINK I MAY BE HYPED IT HITS ME...THEN ITS LIKE WAIT.....IS SHE OR ISNT SHE MY TYPE LIKE THAT,..... I CANT PUT MY FINGER ON IT

OK JUST SO YOU KNOW...........FIRST OFF YOUR TOO NOSEY FOR YOUR OWN GOOD....SECONDLY YOUR TOO GULLIBLE AND NIEVE. YOU NEED TO LEARN TO NOT BELIEVE EVERYBODY...I WANTED TO SEE HOW I STOOD IN YOUR LIFE ON THIS TYPE BASIS... SO I DID THAT..CUZ IF I ASKED YOU WOULDNT TELL ME,.... SO NOW I KNOW.....I WAS KIDDING ABOUT THE GIRL THING...BUT YOU NEED TO CHILL

 

HE WAS TELLING ME ABOUT SOME GIRL BUT HE WAS LYING AT THE END. sO ANYWAY ANY INPUT SHOULD I WALK AWAY FOR SEE WHERE IT GOES i LIKE HIM I AM SERIOUSLY NOT THINK SERIOUSLY I HAVE TOLD HIM I JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN AND GO WITH IT. i TOLD HIM IT FEELS RIGHT SO I JUST GO WITH IT.

i NEED ADVICE PLEASE!!!!!