Getting a girl thats already engaged.

[pricecheck023]

My friends and I have a tradition of going to this same bar every thursday night to hear a buddy play music. There is this girl, Megan, who is also there every Thursday. I originally didn't know her when we first started going. She would always just show up by herself and go hang out with some other friends I know at their table. This girl is one of the sexiest and gorgeous girls I've ever seen. I'm sort of a shy guy so I never introduced myself for the longest time, plus she's a little quite too. Then, finally, a mutual friend introduced her to me the night of my birthday and it became obvious that she was into me. She was very flirty to say the least. Another week or 2 went by and myself and 2 friends joined her at a table late in the night when she was sitting there alone. We, again, hit it off good, making each other laugh, and being flirty. I told her that I wanted to eat at the restaurant that she was a manager of sometime and she said that I should call her ahead of time to make reservations. Not having her number I made the clever move of saying ''well how am I suppose to call you if I don't have your number?'' From that point on we would text "flirty" things to each other every now and then. Then one thursday she ended up coming home with me and some friends. Once my other friends left, Megan stayed with me and we hooked up. Halfway through the night she started saying she should go.....because she was engaged.....nice. But she hinted that our night was to be continued. I like to think of myself as a good guy. I don't wanna mess with a girl thats involved with another dude. It's shady I know. But, even though we haven't done anything sexual since then we still see each other every week and flirt and she talks about how much she wants to do me and how hot I am and that maybe when her guy is out of town again we can do something. I'm also starting to really like her emotionally because we connect on so many levels other than just attraction. In fact, I've fallen head over heels for this girl...Her "fiance" is never around and apparently they've been engaged for like 3 yrs or more so I'm starting to wonder if they really want to go through with marriage. I've heard he just plays Call of Duty all the time. Like I say, I know this is making me a complete dick to continue talking to this girl, but I can't help how I feel for her. I don't know what to do...I know everybody's just gonna say find another girl or forget about her, but it's not that easy. I see her every week. And in my opinion this girl is special because I've been single for a long time now, waiting for someone I truly want to be with to come along and this is her. Others have come and gone bc they didn't have that spark that pulled me in, but this girl has it. But what the hell do I do? She's even sent me dirty pics of her....it's killing me. Also, I know people are gonna say she's probably a slut and why would I wanna be with someone who cheats, but I'm just wondering if her relationship just isn't what it use to be with her guy, but I feel like she believes that since shes already gotten engaged and so use to being engaged that there's no turning back now and that she has to stay with him. I need this girl in my life. It's killing me. How do I get through to her?

[Datura]

She's not going to leave her fiance for you. Speaking hypothetically - let's say she does leave him to get with you. You would be a rebound, that's number 1. Secondly, how do you expect to obtain trust from a woman who cheats on her fiance?

 

You are justifying your behavior by saying, "They may never get married; the engagement has been going on 3 years, he plays Call Of Duty all day, and doesn't spend much time with her." If he's such a bad guy, why is she with him, and why isn't she leaving him?

 

Stop thinking with your dick.

[Dust]

When you said you hooked up with her did that mean sex?

 

You’re really disrespecting yourself by being in such a situation. Seriously it would gross me out to think I was with a girl who was seriously dating another guy let alone engaged.

 

If it were me I would break it off. Stop being so shy and say and do the things you want so you get a girl who is actually special. How could you ever trust a girl like this. Any time things were bad between you it would be like is she cheating?

[temporaryvisa]

This whole sitch is nucking futs, hahaha. She's hot and she's got you bothered, but you can find someone just as sexy who doesnt have baggage lined up to her eyes!!!

[thatone]

i'm guessing if the fiance sits around playing video games all day you all aren't that old?

 

3 years is an awful long engagement, someone is holding off on it, that's for sure.

 

if i were in your shoes, i'd probably tell her exactly what i thought of her, and that's why i have to say no as long as she's engaged. if the engagement ends, and she wants to try to start over again, great. if not, best of luck. and if she says yes proceed with high caution, and try to limit your expectations.

[jnj express]

You know the answer to each and every question you have asked

 

Why would you even think of falling for a girl, who is already cheating-----You know that if somehow you ended up with her---what would you have,---a girl that cheated on another to be with you---that would always be in the back of your mind

 

Don't you ask yourself---how come she has all this time to be out and about, if she is engaged---why is she not respecting her relationship

 

It sounds like, no matter what you get from us---you are not gonna be thinking with your brain, you will be taking directions from your "tool"

 

You are the one who has to live with yourself---and if you do mess around and he finds out---you are the one who will have to deal with him---if he comes looking for you----it doesn't happen often, but it does happen

 

You need to start thinking with your brain-----are you trying to tell me there is not one girl out there, who is single, that you could be with---in all honesty, all you really want out of this girl, is to see if you can get the forbidden fruit----be careful

[Stilicho]

dude, as somebody who mae the mistake of trusting a girl that i took away from their ex, dont do it.

 

youll never trust her, honestly, she may try to say hes not there emotionally, or doesnt appreciate her or whatever b.s, but if he was so bad, she'd leave him on her own.

 

when she tells you that ****, its just her trying to assuage her guilt for flirting/hooking up with you by trying to justify it in her head.

 

go for somebody else man, trust me.

[Viking]

Don't be a piece of **** and ruin something someone else already has. Let them figure it out and then if she decides she doesn't want him, let her make the contact. I have been in the situation where my GF flirts with some piece of **** like you and it enraged me.

 

Here's the kicker, I called her out on it and told her I was going to break up with her. Guess what she did? She stopped talking to him. That's what is going to happen to you. You will turn into the guy who caused problems, and therefore is no longer allowed to talk to the girl.

[theobserver]

Stay away from this chick.

 

I'll tell you what's up, I can buy her bf may play games a little too much. It's also obvious she does her own thing and he does his BUT a lot of people do that without any issues. Obviously though she's lacking some attention she thinks she deserves YOU gave her that but women who are willing to cheat because they are not getting attention.. and they don't discuss anything (as far as we know) with their partners are to be avoided.

 

Lets say she breaks up with her fiance can you guarantee this wont happen with you and her? She was willing to cheat AND SHE IS cheating with you. Expect her to talk down on her man more and more. This chicks too much drama you need to step back and end this. He's going to find out at some point anyway don't make **** worse.

 

If you are really willing to take a chance with this girl though then make things clear that this is only going to continue if she is committed to you she needs to end things with her guy. If she can't do that then what is the point? You are a dirty little secret.

 

No matter what happens be prepared to lose some friends over this. I hope you learn from this. You F'd up and so has she.

[Darren Taylor]

If she's willing to cheat with you, she'll cheat on you as well. Girls like her are not relationship material.

[seibert253]

If she's willing to cheat with you, she'll cheat on you as well. Girls like her are not relationship material.

 

^^^^^^

No better advice than this.

[Sacred-Self]

"I need this girl in my life" with a clingy comment like that you're already ****ed. Why would you go after an engaged woman man. Seriously respect the other man and go find a right woman one that doesn't cheat. And don't ever say **** like I need this girl, this sort of desperatism leads to romeoism which leads to lower self esteem.

[sanskrit]

Is she really "engaged" as in -wearing an engagement ring-? or just a young girl living with some bozo half out of convenience and using the "engaged" term a bit dishonestly for the benefit of her family and to keep other guys out of her pants until she is ready to give it up?

 

If she is really engaged, I agree with everyone else. If not, bang away. She wouldn't be the first girl in the world to use a fake BF to slow things down or manipulate, and frankly so many of them of all ages do this today that if you rule out all the ones who do, you will end up ruling most all women out. This is one disgusting thing that too many women do today that needs to flat out stop.

 

There is just no sacredness among young folks about being in or maintaining adult relationships honestly. I see this among my very younger friends constantly. It's different, so OP, would go for it, press her on it, and be ready to walk the instant the "fiancee" turns out to be legit.