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why is he attracted to my mom?


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reasontosigh

For some strange reason, that song "Obsession" (I believe the band was called Animotion?) keeps playing through my head.....

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i dream of a muslim

i just cant bring my self to do it no matter how much i want to ......... it will hurt me even more ....... i just cant......i love this guy with all my heart and ive been there for him through ever thing family problems.. and wen we were just friends to wen we dated to wen he broke my heart to wen he had problems with the girl he left me for to wen they broke up and now wen we r dating again

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ThisGirlNameKD

Just because you've helped him through some things does not mean you're forever obligated to him be there for him. If you don't want to leave this guy, what advice are you looking for from us? Nothing we say or do could make the guy change and stop his attraction he has for your mother. That's a thing call wishful thinking and it doesn't work. It ignores reality. You have no control over people. You can't control what he feels or thinks, and giving him all the sex in the world control him or change the way he feels or thinks (which I think you see right now). You're doing all this stuff to him sexually, and he's still talking about your mom. If you don't agree with that, lose him. If you don't want to lose him, put up with the drama.

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i dream of a muslim

see my boy friend refers to me as his girl all the time talks about wanting to get married and have alot of kids..... all the time and just up to about 2 days ago is when this $#!+ about my mom started......

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i dream of a muslim
Originally posted by ThisGirlNameKD

Just because you've helped him through some things does not mean you're forever obligated to him be there for him. If you don't want to leave this guy, what advice are you looking for from us? Nothing we say or do could make the guy change and stop his attraction he has for your mother. That's a thing call wishful thinking and it doesn't work. It ignores reality. You have no control over people. You can't control what he feels or thinks, and giving him all the sex in the world control him or change the way he feels or thinks (which I think you see right now). You're doing all this stuff to him sexually, and he's still talking about your mom. If you don't agree with that, lose him. If you don't want to lose him, put up with the drama.

 

 

i havnt givin him sex since ive known about thisi just found out 2 days ago im not giving him the sex for him 2 be happy im doing it because we both are comfturble and enjoy it with eachother and cuz i love him.......... and reason im telling you guys this and trying to get advice is 1. its always good to talk to some one and get stuff off your chest and 2. mabey give me the guts and brain power to finaly say enough bull$#!+

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ThisGirlNameKD

You have the right to vent. If you want to vent though, say that you want to vent. But you did ask on your orginal post for help. Yet, regardless of the advice that we have given you, all three pages of it, you're still adamant about staying with this guy. What more can we tell you? After awhile folks give up on giving advice to those who are not willing to change the situation that's causing them problems. If you don't want to leave him, what help are you seeking?

 

Do you want people to help you get over him?

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It's so obvious that he doesn't care about you no matter what he says. You said it yourself. You were there when he cheated on you, there for him when he was with another girl, there for him when they broke up, back with him again, give him all the booty he wants...Hes using you. He realizes that no matter what he does or what he says YOU are gonna STILL be there. And I don't think he's gonna see what he has til its gone...But maybe it's just me...

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chrissy4534624

sweetie we ALL stop eating when we break up with a guy, just because your belly hurts from the pain doesn't mean u can't live without him. u are just young. you're food problem is a different story. i lost weight with every boyfriend i dumped but that had to do with me not the fact that the guy was so freakkin special that i couldnt deal with life without him. i think you need therapy for some other issues besides the dude, you have a sick puppy on ur hands and im sure he would get worse as time goes on. you don't sound very strong, and u dont sound like you're really here for advice because you're not listening to anyone. the fact that you posted the message means you already realize there is a problem, so grow up a little and deal with it or don't complain about it.

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is dumping this guy out of the question? I am amazed at what some women are willing to put up with. Is it that he's the best you could ever hope for, or that he's some true, only "soul mate" for you? This guy is obviously not going to get over his infatuation with your mother, no matter how much it disrespects her and hurts you. If you are determined to be with him, you'll have to put up with this part of his behavior. Your poor mom too will have to put up with his leering and remarks, and it could end up driving a wedge between you and her.

 

Imagine a life with this guy. You'd be worried everytime you go visit your parents that he's going to say something or make a move on your mother, and you sure won't feel valued and loved as a woman. If I was your mother, I wouldn't let him in my home. I don't know much about the Muslim religion but I do know men from that part of the world tend to have different views about women than they do here. I agree with someone else who replied and said he probably isn't joking about wanting a threesome.

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I'm a Muslim woman and it is against Islam (it's stated in the Quran) to be with a woman and her mother/sister/any relative at the same time. And as a matter of fact my ex who was an American was attracted to my mother. So before you start talking about my people and how my culture is the reason this lady's loser boyfriend wants her mother, look around you and see what your people are doing...

 

and to the white lady who's dreaming of a Muslim...look, your boyfriend is using you because you're white. I know it sounds terrible but a lot of Middle Eastern men think they can use, abuse, and disgard white women because they don't respect them and think they're sluts. This man probably thinks of you this way too. He wouldn't dare tell a Middle Eastern woman that he wants to be with her mother. Don't let him disrespect you just because you're white. You need to show him that you're not a pushover

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same1aslastposter

i think he's saying all of that about your mother to get you to leave him. This guy is lower than dirt and you're too dependent on him. He wants you to leave him alone but he doesn't want to crush you by telling you that he doesn't want you either. He's a confused little boy who's trying hard to get rid of you. At first I thought he was just sick and playing with your head and disrespecting you because you're white and using you because you allow yourself to get used. The more you try to please him and satisfy his every need, the more he'll take advantage of you. Trust me, sister, I've been there. They'll use you and leave you. And I know it feels like your life is over when you try to break up with him, but you'll feel better after a few weeks and you'll look back and go what the heck was I thinking? There's no way around it. It's going to hurt to leave him because you're so attached to him, but if you don't do it now, it's going to hurt even more when he leaves you or cheats on you or says more hurtful things to you. And I'm telling you again, it's going to hurt to leave him, but you absolutely have to. Don't even try to work it out..leave him..and trying to fill the void by getting a job or forcing yourself to find a hobby outside your home.

 

You sound like a very sweet girl with a big heart. You don't need to be with this man. And if you just prefer Middle Eastern/Muslim men, trust me, there are plenty of wonderful handsome single Muslim brothers around. Just stay away from the ones that call themselves Muslims but don't act it (i.e. fornicate, give their girlfriends hell). That's a good indication that they're fake, confused, and trash. You deserve better and you WILL find someone else once you get rid of the junk you have now.

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