Brvn10_drjb7 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 im a hindu and my GF is 2 years and 9 months older than me.. we are together for 5 months.. she is 26 . i always had in mind that i shud marry a younger gurl.. but after knowing her i was willing to compromise that factor.. she is very understanding and very matured.. my parents got to know about this and they are totally against it.. they said.. when im 30.. she will be 32 and will look alot older than me.. they are very strict on this.. they are typical indian parents who wants their son to marry a younger gurl.. i only reason im not willing to leave my GF is becoz she loves me alot.. more than i love her.. if i leave her.. she will completely break down..im confused.. guys.. HELP ME OUT...! Link to post Share on other sites
skirt swoosh Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 You don't love her and are using her age or your parents as a scapegoat. You don't need excuses to break it off when you don't want her. She'll be better off without an untrue lover. Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 I am older than my husband but look younger than him. Plus your age difference is not that big. How old are you now? Link to post Share on other sites
oldguy Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 I am not Hindu so I do not understand the complexities of this but from my perspective; 2 years is NEVER a big deal. I think if you are worried enough about your wife looking 32 when you are 30 you should not marry anyone until you are old enough to see how.... silly, (that was the nicest way I could think of putting it), that is. The fact that this is a big deal to your parents though tells me it is a cultural issue that you and I do not share, at all. I would think that rather than marry this girl because your afraid of how the brake up would effect her, you should do her a favor and leave so both of you can find someone more compatible. Link to post Share on other sites
skirt swoosh Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 I am older than my husband but look younger than him. Plus your age difference is not that big. How old are you now? 26 minus 2 years and 9 months is? Can't do the math? He is 23 or 24. Link to post Share on other sites
skirt swoosh Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 I am not Hindu so I do not understand the complexities of this but from my perspective; 2 years is NEVER a big deal. I think if you are worried enough about your wife looking 32 when you are 30 you should not marry anyone until you are old enough to see how.... silly, (that was the nicest way I could think of putting it), that is. The fact that this is a big deal to your parents though tells me it is a cultural issue that you and I do not share, at all. I would think that rather than marry this girl because your afraid of how the brake up would effect her, you should do her a favor and leave so both of you can find someone more compatible. Indian and Middle Eastern cultures see much larger age gaps, i.e. well into the double digits, but with the man as the older partner. Going for an older woman as his first wife and he is still young, in his culture it is down right perverse. Link to post Share on other sites
Lucky_One Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 It is also perverse to marry someone that you don't love. OP, go ahead and break up with her. Trust me, she will get over a 5 month long dating R. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Brvn10_drjb7 Posted May 24, 2011 Author Share Posted May 24, 2011 I am older than my husband but look younger than him. Plus your age difference is not that big. How old are you now? i am 24 and she is 26 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Brvn10_drjb7 Posted May 24, 2011 Author Share Posted May 24, 2011 thanks guys.. i know that 2 years is not a big gap.. for for my parents ..IT IS... deep down.. i still love my GF.. but all this issues gives me a huge headache.... i dont wanna loose her just becoz of age... and i dnt have the heart to leave her.. i did all kind of stuff to wow her and make her fall for me.. i cant just leave her and go ... what if she dont wanna find another guy after me? i dnt wanna spoil her life.. im confused guys.. totally confused.... HELP ME>..! Link to post Share on other sites
anne1707 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 26 minus 2 years and 9 months is? Can't do the math? He is 23 or 24. Thank you for the gracious response - your attempt at sarcasm was much appreciated I had missed her age in the OP - it does happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Afishwithabike Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 Are your parents marrying her or are you marrying her? If her two year age difference is the biggest problem you have, you really don't have any real life problems. A two year age difference is nothing. I understand the cultural issues you face. My parents are Asian immigrants and my mom is a year older than my father. The horror, the horror! No one in the family cares about it and it certainly didn't bother my father. A woman who is two years older than her husband doesn't look significantly older. I don't know where one would get such an idea. I can see a ten or fifteen year age difference being a problem, but two years...c'mon! If you want to marry her, grow a backbone and marry her. At the end of the day, it's your life and you'll be alive a lot longer than your parents. Do you want to wonder what life would have been like if you had married her? Will you wonder if she's the one that got away? If you're this much under the control of your parents then do the girl a favor and don't marry her. She could probably find someone far better. Link to post Share on other sites
Arabella Posted May 31, 2011 Share Posted May 31, 2011 I'm 7 years older than my boyfriend and people can't tell by appearance alone. It usually doesn't become obvious until they've talked to us and then realize that I am a little more mature. If you want to be with her, who cares what your parents think? I understand in your culture this may be difficult to accept socially, but look at it this way: nobody else has to know that she is older than you... unless you choose to tell them. Be happy & stop worrying. Arabella Link to post Share on other sites
xiaochun3612 Posted June 1, 2011 Share Posted June 1, 2011 im a hindu and my GF is 2 years and 9 months older than me.. we are together for 5 months.. she is 26 . i always had in mind that i shud marry a younger gurl.. but after knowing her i was willing to compromise that factor.. she is very understanding and very matured.. my parents got to know about this and they are totally against it.. they said.. when im 30.. she will be 32 and will look alot older than me.. they are very strict on this.. they are typical indian parents who wants their son to marry a younger gurl.. i only reason im not willing to leave my GF is becoz she loves me alot.. more than i love her.. if i leave her.. she will completely break down..im confused.. guys.. HELP ME OUT...! Mutual tolerance and understanding of love can only go long! good luck ! Link to post Share on other sites
Get Posted June 2, 2011 Share Posted June 2, 2011 You could also fall in love with a girl who is biologically younger than you but looks older. Some people just age better than others. Who cares what she looks like, anyway? What happens if she is in a horrible car accident and is terribly disfigured somehow? Or if she gets breast cancer and has to get a mastectomy? Or simply gets fat after pregnancy? Are you going to abandon her? If looks matter that much to you (or your parents) then I'd say you've got your priorities all wrong. Link to post Share on other sites
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