heartbroken555 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 This if for those of you thinking about breaking NC. I was dumped 5 month ago, and boy i wish i stick with NC from day 1 ! i would feel so much better right now. I would feel better for 2 reasons, 1st of all, i wouldnt be embarassed of chasing someone who doesnt want me. and 2nd i would have healed faster after my break up, for the 1st month, me and my ex kept texting each other back and forth, and it still wasnt sure if it was a definite break up. and i should just have dissapeared from the surface of earth... The second month we also had contact, and on the third month i decided to go NC. i kept it for 1 month, then i broke it. I told myself, that i would try to be her friend and then ask her to get a cup of coffee, and then try to win her back..... the truth is....if they want you back, they know how to find you... theres NOTHING you can do... So i talked to my ex yesterday after 5 month, and she said she was happy to talk to me, and gave me all sorts of false hopes , but then told me she now had someone in her life... i went nuts and i then i told her how much of a selfish person she is, and how i feel betrayed ect ect ect....then we had a fight, and she just made me feel worse!! Lesson of the story, DONT CONTACT YOUR EX IF YOU WERE DUMPED !! EVER !! NO MATTER THE REASON, AND HOW IMPORTANT OR HOW YOU THINKYOU CAN CHANGE HER MIND, DONT DO IT !!! YOU WILL PUSH HER AWAY FURTHER, AND YOU WILL HURT YOURSELF !!! IF YOUR EX CONTACTS YOU, KEEP IT BRIEF, TO THE POINT AND DONT GIVE OUT TOO MUCH INFO. SOMETIMES THEY WANNA SEE IF YOUR STILL ATTACHED FOR A EGO BOOST ! If i wouldnt have contacted my ex, i woud have never known she was seing someone else ( wich i suspected) and i wouldnt be hurt again, i wouldnt look like a idiot ! DONT DO IT ! Link to post Share on other sites
MT152 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Stay strong man. Don't beat yourself up for breaking no contact, because for all you knew she was showing interest again but I feel like people do this to remove some guilt from themselves over leaving you. Link to post Share on other sites
Nohbody Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Ouch. Thanks for sharing the experience, I'm sure we can all use the reminder. Try to move on as best you can, every day may not be better than the last - but hopefully it'll be a wave going in the right direction. Link to post Share on other sites
0hpenelope Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 I'm sorry to hear that your most recent contact with your ex reminded you why you chose your LS screenname, OP. While I'm a strong advocate for No Contact, I'm not an absolutist when it comes to maintaining NC. Those who reach out to their ex when they need to stay in NC learn the hard way why there's such strong support for this method of healing. It's why I lend support when people break NC. More often than not they come back to post about why it was a bad idea, hurt again. Some aren't hurt by breaking NC, but more are hurt when they do. Link to post Share on other sites
stopthemadness Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 I agree!! No Contact No contact is the best way to heal. And the more you keep telling yourself its over. The more youll come to terms with it. Just know at the end of the day, that its gona be ok!! Your gona be ok. Youll find your happy again, but you need to heal first. I never thought Id EVER completely get over my ex. But am doing it! Granted its been 10 months sence the breakup, but am doing it. Let time heal your broken heart, cause weather we want it to or not it will. Staying N/C is key in the healing process...good luck Link to post Share on other sites
NewMoon2203 Posted May 29, 2011 Share Posted May 29, 2011 Well for me No Contact never even exisisted cus she wanted to stay friends... but when i talk to her im careful not to sound desperate, or pushy. I act like i dont want her back.... when actually i really do. But i wont tell her that. afterall, she dumped me. IF she ever wants me back, its on her terms. I know that begging will only push her away more.... sad but true. Link to post Share on other sites
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