I guess getting totally destroyed before serves a purpose...

[Exit]

Starting to accept that there is probably no repairing my current situation. Went through a night or two of believing the whole "I'll never survive this!" stuff. Then I had to remind myself that two or three years ago (I can't even remember exactly when it happened, that's a good sign) I was totally destroyed by another girl leaving who I thought was the love of my life. And it took me waaaay too long to get over her. But today I can think about her or come across her Facebook profile and literally feel just about nothing. Not a small twinge of pain, not a desire to still be with her, pretty much absolute indifference. And I thought I was going to die when that first happened, pain like I had never experienced before.

 

So now, although this current situation sucks because I finally found someone who I loved as much as that girl from 2 or 3 years ago, I can't help but spoil my own pity part, as depressed as I want to be, I know I'll be fine, and I know one day she won't even matter to me, and that day will come a lot sooner if I stop letting her string me along with the possibility of fixing this.

 

So everyone, if this is your first major heartbreak, try to understand that it will not kill you, and will end up being a tool for you to rely on in the future. If this is your 2nd or 3rd or 10th heartbreak, it's time to burst the bubble of that pity party in your head, you know you're gonna make it through, just like you always have before.

 

Well, my Melatonin supplement is making it impossible to keep my eyes open any longer. I highly suggest trying it if your mind won't shut up and makes it hard to sleep.

 

I wanted to repair our relationship... but she put me through too much BS... so now my only goal is that wonderful day when I no longer care.

[bikinibeach]

....like

[0hpenelope]

Yep, that's definitely one way to look at it: when you know that you've seen your absolute rock bottom before and survived it, you know you won't go back to that place again. You know that while people and situations are different, you just know that it won't get much worse than that rock bottom.

[ready4more]

I too have felt destroyed more than once in this life, and feel I have been getting strung along.

 

Only it's been online with a friend I developed more for - but as always the same old line "I'm not ready for a relationship BS" And today I realized you know what? ( If I can do it they can do it ).

 

Right now sure I am going through some depression, I feel partly like some looser becasue once again I could not win someones love.

 

Matter of fact I have no idea what's it like to be in love and have the feelings returned.

 

This time should have been different, after all it wasn't about sex or looks it was all about friendship or so I thought.

 

But then I guess a friend wouldn't give just enough to keep you hanging on, knowing you feel something and not be able to ever return the feelings, its been more than a year since I revealed interest, 3 years since we met.

 

I will get through this ( again ) and simply know better next time to get out much faster instead of feeling like some beggar, Nobody is worth it and they never get over whatever issues they supposedly have anyhow.

 

If I was willing take a chance again after all the BS experiences I've had, they should be willing to do the same after a period of time, No more excuses, when I start feeling like some @ss then it's leaving time!