cj2 Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 Loveshack, First time I have posted on here in many months. 7 months out of my breakup now and I think, pretty much over it. I wanted to post this firstly as a thanks to the posts I received in support at the tail end of last year, secondly as a message of hope to anyone reading this forum, because I see a lot of people stuck in the place where I was 4 or 5 months ago. Things WILL get better for you, but you have to be prepared to work at it. For me, that meant NC, it meant immersing myself in adrenaline fuelled activities that I love; mountain biking, snowboarding, karting, running, it meant trying to put the same effort into relationships with friends and family that I put into my relationship with my ex. None of the above was easy to start with, everything felt tough, it was all a struggle. But take it day by day, force yourself to get into these habits without being too harsh on yourself if progress is slower than you would like and it will get better, you will start to break the cycle of negative thinking. The last couple of weeks I have started dating again, had three first dates in the space of a week. I enjoyed each one, I doubt any of them will go anywhere, but it’s such an interesting way to spend time, just meeting new people from different walks of life. I’m viewing it as a social activity at the moment, rather than a search for love, because to be honest love is the furthest thing from my mind. I look at my life and all I see now is opportunity for the future. I’ve had a serious work promotion, my health is the best it’s ever been, I’ve got some really interesting adventures planned for the rest of the year and I’ve become firmly settled on the idea of emigrating next year. I think about the future and get an enormous sense of excitement and freedom. I’ve grown so much from this experience that I’m getting to the point where I am really grateful for it happening. This break-up has forced me to face up to my own insecurities, my co-dependant behaviour and my lack of social confidence. I’m stronger, louder (in a good way) and 100 times more confident than the person my ex dumped. Best of all, I think at the heart of it I’m still me, I still try to be a decent person, I still try to be there for people, I just don’t take **** from anyone anymore and I’m no longer afraid to stand up and be heard. I haven’t heard from my ex in 3 months and don’t expect too. Despite some of the things she put me through I wish her all the best. It’s ironic though really, I actually think she’d love the person that I have come to be out of this.. the thing is she will never get the chance You’ll get there too Link to post Share on other sites
smudge21 Posted June 4, 2011 Share Posted June 4, 2011 Great post. Thanks for sharing that. Everyone gets there eventually, but the road is tough. Link to post Share on other sites
reimeivn Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Snowboarding is so cool! And I am happy for you too. Who cares what she thinks anymore right? Link to post Share on other sites
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