Danneth Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Hi I've known a girl for a while who I've liked. She's always been a friend and I see her every week along with our other friends. Last night, I decided to make my move. We're both single, she's a nice girl who I'm attracted to. Why not? We'd both had a fair few drinks, and we were left alone together. I can't remember exactly how the next part happened, but we were talking about what it would be like if we were together. I was kind of pushing the idea of us getting together before I made a move and kissed her. She pulled away at first, but after talking for a little while longer, we ended up kissing. She said that we should be FWB, and that I shouldn't expect anything more, also that we shouldn't tell anybody. I agreed (although I'd prefer a relationship, I'm happy with what she is). At the end of the night we kissed again and she told me to call her. Fast forward to today, and I texted her earlier on. Nothing too 'full on', just a short 'hey' type thing. She never responded. I got a text off one of my friends, and they knew about me and her getting together. She'd told them apparently. I thought that was a little strange since she said we should keep it secret. I tried to ring her about an hour ago, and she ignored my call. Am I over-reacting here? I'm a little confused, it just seems like mixed signals. She wants me to call, I do, she ignores it. She says not to tell people, she tells people the next morning. Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Nuts? Penis jerker? Who knows? If she's not interested in dating you, as in going out on a date, and that's what you want, you have your answer. FWB implies *no* expectations. She doesn't answer? Fine. She doesn't call back? Fine. She talks to friends? Fine. There's zero investment, zero expectation, zero emotion. It's a zero. Don't be a hero. Link to post Share on other sites
O'Malley Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 No, you're not overreacting, but you can easily drive yourself crazy, as well as waste your time, analyzing all the reasons that she's acting this way. It sounds like she's passively making it known that she's not interested -- ignoring you, casually mentioning what occurred to your friend. The fact is, your interaction simply wasn't a big deal to her. What she has acknowledged is that you shouldn't expect anything more, and that's about the only thing you should take to heart. Just don't fall victim to the belief that you can leverage a fwb situation with this girl into a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Danneth Posted June 5, 2011 Author Share Posted June 5, 2011 Thanks for the responses. Really, I've just been trying to gauge whether she's still interested in FWB. Ironically, in doing so, I've probably looked a little desperate. Going to leave it for a day or two then bluntly message her asking if she wants to be FWB or not. Link to post Share on other sites
Runforthehills Posted June 5, 2011 Share Posted June 5, 2011 Definately leave it. Build up that sexual tension. I'm learning all this too! Don't appear needy, just respond to her in a short but flirty way when she gets in contact. She will if you keep quite. She'll be wondering whats happening if you go quiet. Just don't flood her. It will spoil it for both of you. I've been having issues with someone at work that I expressed to soon too. My downfall! But I am hoping to build the tension back up again... Link to post Share on other sites
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