z1850 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 My ex-wife committed adultery with two different men, after which I divorced her. After confessing what she did, she now says, "I just made it all up." She has lied to at least three psychologists, whose job it is to help her. Her comment to me was, "I had fun, and you deserved to get hurt." My question to those of you who have been there is, what possible benefit do you gain from continuing to lie, knowing that lying destroyed your marriage to begin with? Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 She sounds like a very sick individual. My guess is that it was probably true about the affairs and now she is just messing with your head. Time to move on with your life. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
reservoirdog1 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 If you have no reason to have anything to do with her (no kids, e.g.), then don't. Just be glad that she's out of your life. Sounds like a borderline sociopath. She's somebody else's problem now. Link to post Share on other sites
What_Next Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Some questions are not going to be answered as there is no answer. Move on and forget about her. Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Two thoughts. Some do it to score imaginary points and actually think it is part of the attraction cycle. Or depending on her level of functioning, she could have a disorder of her personality. As it is over between you, I say ignore her. Don't get roped in.. ever again. Hope you didn't have children with her. At the base of things, she is counting on you asking reasonable questions again until you get upset, so she can cut you down some more. Chances are she will never change. I hope she is able to get good quality care but don't let her use you or your emotional states as a medium to 'play' relationships. Take care, Eve x Link to post Share on other sites
kakui215 Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Is there any at all chance that she actually did "make it all up"? If so, the most you should do is just hope that she ends up with a psychiatric professional who has the skills to help her. If you're sure that she did not make it up, I still say that the most you should do is have hope that she gets the proper diagnosis and treatment. In either case, you're clearly better off with her out of your life. The only reason I could imagine any involvement or further concern from you is if the two of you had any kids together. Did you? Link to post Share on other sites
OldOnTheInside Posted June 6, 2011 Share Posted June 6, 2011 Maybe she doesn't want to take responsibility for what she did. Maybe it's just a facet of her personality. Maybe she's just mentally ill. I don't think you should apply logic with illogical people. You'll go nuts trying to understand her. Hopefully she'll get whatever treatment she needs. Link to post Share on other sites
Author z1850 Posted June 7, 2011 Author Share Posted June 7, 2011 Actually she's a supervisory psychiatrist at a VA hospital. She had sex with two different subordinates at the VA itself in the employee's office, on his desk. She's also self-medicating with high-dose Effexor. I don't know what DSM-IV disorder that is (besides depression). I caught her with a very sensitive semen detection kit that I developed, after which she confessed...reluctantly. The kit detects marker proteins that are present in semen stains on garments, even if a condom is used. Link to post Share on other sites
OldOnTheInside Posted June 7, 2011 Share Posted June 7, 2011 OP, one of the questions that you should be asking yourself is this: What answers do you expect to find for the reasons that your xW has continued to lie? Link to post Share on other sites
Heart On Posted June 7, 2011 Share Posted June 7, 2011 Actually she's a supervisory psychiatrist at a VA hospital. She had sex with two different subordinates at the VA itself in the employee's office, on his desk. She's also self-medicating with high-dose Effexor. I don't know what DSM-IV disorder that is (besides depression). That's Professional Exploitation and she could lose her license if someone reported her.Sounds like Narcissism to me.They don't think rules apply to them and they feel entitled to exploit others.They are also pathological liars and choose professions where they are in positions of Authority and easily hide thier true colors behind masks that keep people off balance to say the least. She needs to be held accountable,but don't expect her to change her colors as that won't ever happen.Oh...and she will project and scapegoat all onto anyone so as to avoid facing the truth of herself.it's all about her defense mechanisms gone haywire! She should NOT be "helping" anyone....let alone being paid by a hospital to do so! She needs a serious wake-up call. Contact an Ethics Commitee and see what they think about her actions. Link to post Share on other sites
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