stressed out

[here4her]

I'll start by giving some quick info about myself and the person I am dating.

Me: Shy, quiet, anxious, I'm always looking for signs of good/bad things. I guess you could say I'm paranoid of failure, and always looking for attention. I was cheated on numerous times through out my life. I was married for 9 years and divorced due to my x cheating.

Her: quiet, shy, I cant say how she is actually really feeling inside cause she doesn't really share those feelings with me. She Is also divorced, and has been deeply hurt in her last relationship (ended over a year ago)

 

We met on match (not my favorite story) about 5 months ago, We took things pretty slow, There are days she will text me good morning, talk about her day, ect... (which I love) and then random days she won't really say much at all. Three months ago she started acting kinda distant not really talking or asking to see me, I asked her whats up she said nothing 2 days later said she wasn't really feeling she was ready to be in a relationship, and wanted to stop talking. A couple days after that told me she made a mistake, and wanted to keep talking just keep going slow.

We started where we ended, moving slow but forward, but lately I've been very nervous due to the fact she seems she is getting distant again, not much communication at all, I'm feeling kinda ignored again.

I asked her last week how she is feeling about us, and where we are going.. she replied she didnt know how to answer that. I know I am really falling for this girl, and was hoping she felt the same way.

The other night we got into a strange conversation, due to the fact she told me her friend contacted her to try to hook her up with one of her friends who was interested in her. I was kinda mad due to the fact I've been at at least 4 family functions with her, while her friend was there and I guess her friend never even noticed me, she didn't date the guy or even talk to him. That turned into her telling me If I wanted to date other people she would be ok with that as long as I told her. I have no desire to see anyone else, and told her that. She said she didn't either but would be ok if I did as long as I told her about it. It just seemed weird I was kinda shocked she said that. We continued with this conversation and she said well to be honest I know Im not really ready to be in a relationship. I asked if she just wanted to stop talking she said no Im fine, I was in shock and really didn't have much to say after that, she noticed and said "I think I said to much" The night ended without so much of a hug.

Its a new relationship, There should be excitement, fun, desire to see each other, flirting, sex ect... Its not really there. I texted her the other day and said I wanted to be more affectionate, hold hands ect.. and she never even replied to it. I'm pretty sure her friend didn't even know we were in a relationship due to the fact we are not really affectionate.

I pretty much adore this girl she just met my kids about a month ago and they ask about her all the time. I just don't know what to do anymore, I'm not sure why she feels she isn't ready to be in a relationship, how to help her, what to do. I'm scared cause like I said I really like her, but I'm feeling I'm gonna get hurt if I stick around.

Need advise please!