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ex's mom wants to be friends on Facebook


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Need some advice on recent situation.

 

My ex and mother of my child broke up in January and we have been living separately for about a month now. I am not friends with my ex on fb as it was too hard for me. However, I am still friends with her family as they all loved me and I love them as well even though we do not communicate. They have been great to me, and they are obviously involved in my sons life. Well, for whatever reason I was not friends with her Mom. Today she sends me a fb friend request and I dont know what to do. I love my ex very much as well as her mom and family, but I need to move on. I don't want to be rude and I was debating unfriending most of her family to help in moving on. Her mom loves me and I don't know what to do as Im friends with most of my ex's family.

 

I was hoping/dreaming that one day I would become a part of their extended family, if my ex hadn't broke up with me. Just the timing of it is weird to me. We weren't friends while I was dating her daughter and expecting and initially raising our child together. Now that we have been broken up for awhile now, she sends me a friend request. I don't know if I'm thinking too much into this as her mom had hoped we could have worked things out and has been a supporter of me.

 

Any thoughts/advice please

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Ummmm. Not sure. I stayed friends with my ex's mom on FB for different reasons. To keep tabs on the ex mostly. It was part of my unhealthy obsession.

 

Your situation is very different. I think if it helps with the kids, keeping a line of communication open to her family, it could be a positive.

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Need some advice on recent situation.

 

My ex and mother of my child broke up in January and we have been living separately for about a month now. I am not friends with my ex on fb as it was too hard for me. However, I am still friends with her family as they all loved me and I love them as well even though we do not communicate. They have been great to me, and they are obviously involved in my sons life. Well, for whatever reason I was not friends with her Mom. Today she sends me a fb friend request and I dont know what to do. I love my ex very much as well as her mom and family, but I need to move on. I don't want to be rude and I was debating unfriending most of her family to help in moving on. Her mom loves me and I don't know what to do as Im friends with most of my ex's family.

 

I was hoping/dreaming that one day I would become a part of their extended family, if my ex hadn't broke up with me. Just the timing of it is weird to me. We weren't friends while I was dating her daughter and expecting and initially raising our child together. Now that we have been broken up for awhile now, she sends me a friend request. I don't know if I'm thinking too much into this as her mom had hoped we could have worked things out and has been a supporter of me.

 

Any thoughts/advice please

 

I think a lot of what you said above should be crafted into a message and sent by private message to her mother on Facebook. It is mature and well thought out. I am sure they will appreciate that you are hurting right now. Maybe someday you can be friends with them after some time has passed. I am sure they will respect you if you set it out as you have above.

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Ghost,

 

I am friends with most of her family. I do not want her mom to feel slighted that I did not add her as a friend considering I'm friends with the rest of her family. It is just the timing of it that is odd to me. So my choices are unfriend all of her family and deny the friend request or accept her since she is the grandmother to my child. I did not want this to happen and I love her Mom. Just want to do the mature thing, as well as do whats best for me to move on. This has been an extremely difficult time as I am trying to get used to not knowing the other side of my son's life with her and her family. This is what my ex wanted, and I just have to accept it I guess.

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stopthemadness

Believe it or not? there alot of us out there who DONT do facebook or myspace just plain and simple emails. Ours lives are much less drama free....just smthing to think about

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stopthemadness,

 

I know your right. It is an easy medium to share pictures of my son with friends from overseas, long distance, etc. I have never been in this situation before where I am forced to interact with an ex because of our son. I am trying to maintain a cordial relationship with my ex for my son's benefit. Just don't want to make my ex's mom feel slighted as she was a big supporter of me and I have the rest of her family on fb. Trying to do the right thing considering she is my sons grandmother and I don't want any animosity between us because of her daughters actions/behavior. Thinking of just letting the request sit there and stay away from fb until I am over the relationship. Or sending her a private message.

 

Thoughts?

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if a send a private msg. what would i even say? i don't want to ignore her, as she will be a big part of my son's life. This sucks

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stopthemadness

You know? you can send pictures through emails. I do it all the time. Sounds like your social networking is causing you some stress huh? Sooo why dont you just delete all your stuff for a while? You can always put it back up later. When its gone you wont have to think about it anymore. I think whats bothering you is the not having control. So take back control. And put it back up when YOUR good and ready....Am just saying.......

Edited by stopthemadness
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Debating on sending her mom a mature msg considering she is the grandmother of my child. Didn't have the opportunity to say goodbye. Would it be a mistake?

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