No to divorce, i want a boyfriend

[Change2]

Okay, So he said he wont give me a divorce. He said we don't need to divorce. So, Im crazy, I told him I want to have a boyfriend then. I am tired of living this life that is passing me by week after week still trying to work on my marriage alone. and im tired. I feel like an awful wife. I am daydreaming about another man. So i had to tell him. Our sex life is just that a sex life. I don't feel like im making love to my husband. Just having sex. I need the emotional side more and tired of asking. Should I have kept this to myself? I am honest with him, maybe too honest. But keeping this just for a few weeks I feel guilty. we have done mc many times nothing changes or gets better.

[PegNosePete]

If you want a divorce then get a divorce. You don't need his permission or co-operation. Just file.

[Change2]

If you want a divorce then get a divorce. You don't need his permission or co-operation. Just file.

if he won't sign how do i go about that

[carhill]

Since your H's past activities have abrogated a number of common and faith-based boundaries, it would seem that the eyes of faith and the law should align pretty well with regards to 'reasons' for divorcing. Where do you live that your husband won't 'give' you a divorce? Here in California, he might not agree to it, but he has no power to stop the process. It's called 'contested'.

 

FWIW, most men won't be interested in the emotional part without the sex part and, generally, most men aren't that passionate about the emotional part anyway. If you want a boyfriend, I'd suggest having the 'open marriage' discussion with your H and doing it transparently, so both BF and H are aware of the realities. IMO, that's healthier than repeating your H's past infidelity and cheating.

 

Unless there's a really compelling reason for staying married, it's probably healthier to D if your differences are irreconcilable. The kids will handle it, taking cues from their parents. You're their role models. What would you have them do?

[Change2]

If you want a divorce then get a divorce. You don't need his permission or co-operation. Just file.

he said he won't sign. so how would that work anyone?

[carhill]

if he won't sign how do i go about that

Petition the court to enter the decree. See a lawyer for more information.

 

Simple flow here in Cali:

 

1. File

 

2. Have him served

 

3. He has 30 days (Cali) to respond. If no response, petition for a default judgment.

 

4. If response and contested, deal with it in court, petitioning for a judgment if you and he can't agree and settle.

[david2011]

If your unhappy obviously he's not your soulmate. You need to get out. Your not an aweful wife, your a human woman. You want to be happy with a person who you can really relate to. Your husband ofcourse is in a bad situation. If this continues and it seems unlikely he will get out of his depressed state, then the option above seems viable. Try and help him even though you are reluctant. Your suppose to be a team, even though his own baggage doesnt help matters. Try and solve the problem but dont stay with him if he can't help himself.

 

The boyfriend option wont work if your still married. it will only make things worse.

 

Good luck

[PegNosePete]

he said he won't sign. so how would that work anyone?

If you're in the UK:

1) Petition

2) If no reply in 8 days, have him served

3) If still no reply in 8 days then you can apply for decree nisi without his signature

4) Wait 6 weeks and a day, apply for absolute

[StoneCold]

if he won't sign how do i go about that

 

Walk out..... you stay separated for 12 months and you can have your divorce.

 

 

But really you should be asking a lawyer this...not us