Thehusband2 Posted June 16, 2011 Share Posted June 16, 2011 Ok here is my problem. I don’t know if I am being reasonable, but not saying anything prior to this was getting to my head. Here is the story. Im married to my wife for 7 years now. She is awesome and kind. She genuinely wants to help people and never wants to hurt anyone (me included!). The only flaw in my opinion is that because in her own opinion she conducts herself in a respectful way, if you have a problem with her action she doesn’t see eye to eye!!! The issue: Twice in the last few months she went out with her married friend (unhappily married, husband never hangs out with her) and they ended up drinking and at a club coming home at 5am. Now, although we both enjoy parties, socializing and drinks I didn’t feel that it was ‘right’ for her to be going clubbing, drinking and coming home at 5am. I told her I didn’t like it cause I know what guys go to clubs and what they want and didn’t feel I wanted my wife in that environment. She said she felt its not an issue because she was just there to talk and socialize and regardless of what a guy WANTS that is not what she WANTS. I just don’t like the idea of her essentially signle friend constantly getting my wife to dress hot, go out and drink. Writing this makes me feel that I am partly wrong – but I just don’t like it!!! We have kids so it is not always so easy for the both of us to go out so I understand that sometime she goes, sometimes me, sometimes both in which case she drink with me allllll night no problem!! Am I wrong???????????? Next issue, with same friend they went to a restaurant and met a guy who manages it. The guy offered them a business idea over a few beers and that was it. The following week he texted my wife asking when they would be down for drinks, wife responded that she was too tired after working, he insisted, she resisted and that was it. Next she texted her friend asking to set up a time to visit this guy for beers. I asked her about that and she insisted its just to discuss the business idea. Honestly, there was no mention of business in any texts just beers. She feels like its not an issue because she has no intentions perhaps – but once again I don’t like her in this situation i.e. a guy inviting her for drinks (to get drunk) on a Sunday evening (that’s family time man!!!!) I also don’t like the idea of anyone buying her and her friend drinks….if she wants beers…I can get that Once again…am I crazy???? Please be honest!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted June 17, 2011 Share Posted June 17, 2011 A married woman with children should not be going out clubbing and drinking "to talk" and coming home at 5am. This is what single people do and not married people. She is beginning to go down a very dangerous slope. Now we have this manager asking to meet her for drinks. She can rationalize it all she wants but this is very disrespecting to you and your marriage. You need to deal with this issue and deal with it now. If this is really a legitimate business deal (which I doubt) then invite him for lunch with you and your wife and look at the details of the business plan. If you have read about affairs one of the big red flags are spouses who go out at night to clubs and do not return until the early morning. We know why guys go to clubs and married women drinking at nightclubs until 5am is really bad news. This seems like a slow train wreck just waiting to happen. Link to post Share on other sites
seibert253 Posted June 18, 2011 Share Posted June 18, 2011 A married woman with children should not be going out clubbing and drinking "to talk" and coming home at 5am. This is what single people do and not married people. She is beginning to go down a very dangerous slope. Now we have this manager asking to meet her for drinks. She can rationalize it all she wants but this is very disrespecting to you and your marriage. You need to deal with this issue and deal with it now. If this is really a legitimate business deal (which I doubt) then invite him for lunch with you and your wife and look at the details of the business plan. If you have read about affairs one of the big red flags are spouses who go out at night to clubs and do not return until the early morning. We know why guys go to clubs and married women drinking at nightclubs until 5am is really bad news. This seems like a slow train wreck just waiting to happen. Bryan's hit it dead on. How would she feel if the rolls were reversed and YOU were the one out clubbing till 5am, and planning to meet some woman for beers and a "business idea". You need to put your foot down on this one with a big "no way in hell" to her. Link to post Share on other sites
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