Dating Sux Posted June 17, 2011 Share Posted June 17, 2011 I have been sleeping off and on with my remarried ex husband. I feel no guilt attached to this as the woman he married is the same one who slept with him when he was my husband. We were married for 23 years and have been divorced for 3. He is the one who approached me first. I know he most likely will always be a cheater, he cheated with me from almost the beginning of his new relationship. If he had married another woman I would never even think of sleeping with him. If he left this woman and remarried I would also never sleep with him. I have only been with one other man since our divorce and I am very lonely right now. I am 49 but only attracted men in their 30's. I don't want a younger man than me. I lost 183 pounds in the last 5 years and I am very self concious about my extra skin. I want a pot bellied, older man like my ex. By the way the woman he married is overweight, very masculine and bossy and is a witch to my boys. Link to post Share on other sites
Damia Posted June 17, 2011 Share Posted June 17, 2011 They say revenge is a dish best served cold. Im not sure if i should be yelling from the side lines with my pom poms or cautioning you to be careful with your heart. Doing this certainly sticks it to the OW but also rewards your xH, he is having his cake and eating it AGAIN please be careful with your self respect .your weight loss is huge are you looking after yourself? Is there a possibility that you can afford to have that extra skin removed? you deserve better Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted June 17, 2011 Share Posted June 17, 2011 They say revenge is a dish best served cold. Indeed. But the OP is quite obviously not "cold"! I don't think this is really a good idea to continue in the long term. What will it achieve? You're just hurting yourself in the end, and holding yourself back from a potentially happy life. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr.Harris Posted June 17, 2011 Share Posted June 17, 2011 Now you're just as bad as the woman who did this to you. This doesn't achieve anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Woman In Blue Posted June 17, 2011 Share Posted June 17, 2011 Wow, he sounds like such a prize. How'd you let him slip through your fingers? I actually find it quite comical that he married his side piece and now he's having sex with you. She's getting exactly what she deserves. I do, however, think you should take pictures the next time you're naked with him and send them to Bridezilla - maybe she can find room for them in her wedding album. He's still a scumbag, though. Link to post Share on other sites
pebbles80 Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 I have been sleeping off and on with my remarried ex husband. I feel no guilt attached to this as the woman he married is the same one who slept with him when he was my husband. We were married for 23 years and have been divorced for 3. He is the one who approached me first. I know he most likely will always be a cheater, he cheated with me from almost the beginning of his new relationship. If he had married another woman I would never even think of sleeping with him. If he left this woman and remarried I would also never sleep with him. I have only been with one other man since our divorce and I am very lonely right now. I am 49 but only attracted men in their 30's. I don't want a younger man than me. I lost 183 pounds in the last 5 years and I am very self concious about my extra skin. I want a pot bellied, older man like my ex. By the way the woman he married is overweight, very masculine and bossy and is a witch to my boys. Hey there Dating Sux, how are you feeling about things now? I am in pretty much the same situation as you. My H left for OW two years ago and things between us have never completely been 'off' I tried to move on and had a new relationship but that ended for other reasons as well as the fact my STBXH and I were still in a sexual relationship with each other. I broke it off with H for a while but things are now back to normal. Sometimes I feel crap that he is still with the fOW and not me but then other times I feel like I am getting my revenge on her. I am going back to breaking it off with him now though as its just making me feel crap. I got a lot of good advice on my thread about thinking about what I want and you need to do the same. I'm sure that once you start thinking about it you will break things off with him for good, you have a great life out there for yourself its not over just because your not with him anymore. And in time when you least expect it the right man for you will turn up. Love yourself and your boys. It does sound like for your part this is mostly out of revenge not because you want this man which I understand too! Its a complicated feeling. I think these women treat our kids like rubbish coz it takes away dads attention from them and is also a little reminder that your still around and not going anywhere. We have something that they may never have - their partners kids! Stay strong xx Link to post Share on other sites
melenkurion Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 There's a part of me that would love to get the chance to do what you have done. Not because I want my ex back, but to stick a metaphorical knife in the gut of the "friend" he left me for. Trouble is, I wouldn't be able to get the detachment to do it and my emotions would get involved, all over again. It wouldn't help me at all. Even if I could get the detachment, the thoughts of revenge would keep me stuck in the past. Your ex sounds like an extremely unpleasant man. You can do much better. Link to post Share on other sites
jnj express Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 No matter how you wanna put it---there is only one person being hurt here, and it is YOU---- You got your lowlife X---to satisfy you whenever you need it, so you really arn't making the full effort needed to go out and find a decent man Yes, You probably will have trouble finding a decent guy---but there are some out there, you just gotta look Do you have any hobbies, do you go to the races, sporting events---golf----they are all great places to meet men---good guys, and bad guys----you just need to sort it all out---but as long as you rely on your scum X---you will never move on---you will just stay in the same pit you are in----Hey its your life---the rest of it can be good, or bad----right now it seems that its pretty BAD Link to post Share on other sites
betterdeal Posted July 30, 2011 Share Posted July 30, 2011 Is there a question you'd like us to answer? I understand what you've said, but it's not clear to me what you'd like to hear back from other posters? Link to post Share on other sites
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