Mary Shadows Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Men: Would you go NC with an ex for a few months, then call to say you've met another partner? Would you go NC if you knew that your partner deserved better? What I mean by this: leaving your ex alone, to let them live their live, and achieve their goals. Link to post Share on other sites
aisle_seat Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 Depending on the nature of the break up, I can see contacting an ex if the purpose is to suggest getting back together. I would never contact an ex to rub in their noses the fact that I've gotten together with someone else, I don't care how bitter the break up was. That's just stupid and cruel. Link to post Share on other sites
OhMittens Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 I would never contact an ex to rub in their noses the fact that I've gotten together with someone else, I don't care how bitter the break up was. That's just stupid and cruel. I agree. It would be immature and show the lack of respect you have for them as a person. Link to post Share on other sites
radiodarcy Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 are you talking about going NC without telling her any of this? or telling her and then going NC? i certainly hope it's the latter. doing the former sounds unconscionably cruel. if you really care for someone the least you can do is give tell them it's not working out and dump them; not string them along until you find someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 22, 2011 Share Posted June 22, 2011 When I'm done with someone and have communicated such, they're dead to me. It's like they never existed. This would include women who proactively end our association. I accept their words and erase them. IMO, it's the healthy thing to do. Dragging things on just seems pointless and painful. I think everyone deserves better. Improving oneself throughout life is a noble goal. I learned this lesson from women Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary Shadows Posted June 23, 2011 Author Share Posted June 23, 2011 are you talking about going NC without telling her any of this? or telling her and then going NC? i certainly hope it's the latter. doing the former sounds unconscionably cruel. if you really care for someone the least you can do is give tell them it's not working out and dump them; not string them along until you find someone else. This actually happened to me. An ex contacted me awhile ago, and told me that he really liked our "intimate experiences" then he said "are you with someone, well I am." So mean!!! It still hurst D: Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary Shadows Posted June 23, 2011 Author Share Posted June 23, 2011 When I'm done with someone and have communicated such, they're dead to me. It's like they never existed. This would include women who proactively end our association. I accept their words and erase them. IMO, it's the healthy thing to do. Dragging things on just seems pointless and painful. I think everyone deserves better. Improving oneself throughout life is a noble goal. I learned this lesson from women Acceptance is the hardest thing for me. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 I think telling your ex that you've got a new partner is a disrespect to your new partner. Unless you're still friends with the ex that is. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary Shadows Posted June 24, 2011 Author Share Posted June 24, 2011 I think telling your ex that you've got a new partner is a disrespect to your new partner. Unless you're still friends with the ex that is. What would be the reason behind telling an ex that you're with someone new? I'm just wondering, because a man did this to me. I was the ex that he called to let me know that he has another partner. Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted June 24, 2011 Share Posted June 24, 2011 I can't think of any reason why someone of solid mental reasoning and maturity would do that. I guess it was one of the following: - Showing off - Making you feel bad - His new GF made him do it Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary Shadows Posted June 24, 2011 Author Share Posted June 24, 2011 contacting an ex after nc just to say u have another partner is insecure as it can get someone who does that really deserves karma It's been about five months since he's contacted me. I guess I always analyze his behavior. As if him contacting me, means he actually misses me. I doubt that is the case. Perhaps I'm too weak to move on. Link to post Share on other sites
painfullyobvious Posted June 24, 2011 Share Posted June 24, 2011 Depending on the nature of the break up, I can see contacting an ex if the purpose is to suggest getting back together. I would never contact an ex to rub in their noses the fact that I've gotten together with someone else, I don't care how bitter the break up was. That's just stupid and cruel. This also suggests to me that a person is not over their ex if they feel the need to contact them to gloat, rub their nose in it, etc. What possible good could come from doing this? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary Shadows Posted June 25, 2011 Author Share Posted June 25, 2011 This also suggests to me that a person is not over their ex if they feel the need to contact them to gloat, rub their nose in it, etc. What possible good could come from doing this? That is sick and twisted. He threatened me by saying that he wasn't going to call again. That's why it hurts. It was much too manipulative. This I do know. Link to post Share on other sites
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