wilsonx Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 I have had this stupid cough for 3 months since I moved into this apartment and have been to the dr 3 times with 3 different diagnoses and all of them wrong. My new roommate and I cleaned the **** out of the carpets and the entire apartment and he made a comment last night that my cough had started to die down a lot (I have never smoked a cigarette or anything in my life). So I went into the bathroom coughed for a second and spit out blood like 5 times and this was at 2am. I said **** guess its time for the ER and I said man it sucks that shes not here to support me. So I drove to the ER bymyself waited an hour to get into the room to be seen and I realized something, I DID NOT NEED her. I did this on my own. Completely and utterly on my own. I had been stressed out for the past 5 weeks about it and they took my blood pressure 164/117 and I was like uhhh thats high as ****. The second time wasn't any better. So they ran some tests, did all these other things and said its probably allergies or acid reflux (and I was like son of a bitch). The nurse asked me why I was stressed and I told her that my ex left me for a 37 year old cook that lives in a trailer park and shes 23. You know what she said? "Looks like you dodged a bullet there" I LAUGHED SO HARD because its true. I instantly texted message one of my friends at 530 am and she laughed and said it was true. I went from sad stressed out to laughing and thinking to myself, shes right why do i still even care. Link to post Share on other sites
0hpenelope Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 I'd like to share my funny thing too, wilson. I'm not at 100% yet, but I'm feeling much better after the break up. I think I handled myself with a lot of class because I had learned from my previous mistakes and others' mistakes, too. Since the break up, mutual friends who haven't been in touch got in touch more frequently and I receive unsolicited updates about the ex from acquaintances. I thought it would hurt to hear about him. But I'm reaping the benefits of NC in that all of this information really didn't move me like I feared it would. Your independent actions are indicators of you validating yourself. It's a huge accomplishment; that while support from friends and family is really awesome, our best support should be ourselves. Good job on getting your health taken care of! Link to post Share on other sites
IfiKnewThen Posted June 23, 2011 Share Posted June 23, 2011 i used to do everything with my best friend and then partner. i didnt think i could do anything without him too. so i know what you mean. its self validating to go it, without them. mine was a LDR so we would play games together. and i am only giving you very small examples here. but i thought i would never play my game again. not only did i miss him but i missed the things i did with him. so i decided i wouldnt let him take certain things away from me. so i started playing this online game again. and guess what? i actually still had fun without him! and i thought he gave me the confidence to play. this time i gave myself that confidence. also, he would help me write letters to people when i had troubles or a complaint...like to the telephone company etc. well, i started writing without his help and got things accomplished without him. i mean they are simple small things. but it is like reclaiming your life or that preservative and not making it all about them. yeah she didnt go to the ER with you, but it shows you can STILL take care of yourself. that you care enough about YOU. that she didnt take that from you. so congratz. and glad you laughed a little too Link to post Share on other sites
0hpenelope Posted June 24, 2011 Share Posted June 24, 2011 i used to do everything with my best friend and then partner. i didnt think i could do anything without him too. so i know what you mean. its self validating to go it, without them. mine was a LDR so we would play games together. and i am only giving you very small examples here. but i thought i would never play my game again. not only did i miss him but i missed the things i did with him. so i decided i wouldnt let him take certain things away from me. so i started playing this online game again. and guess what? i actually still had fun without him! and i thought he gave me the confidence to play. this time i gave myself that confidence. also, he would help me write letters to people when i had troubles or a complaint...like to the telephone company etc. well, i started writing without his help and got things accomplished without him. i mean they are simple small things. but it is like reclaiming your life or that preservative and not making it all about them. yeah she didnt go to the ER with you, but it shows you can STILL take care of yourself. that you care enough about YOU. that she didnt take that from you. so congratz. and glad you laughed a little too I agree. Celebrating baby steps is healthy, I think, and then all of those things will just occur naturally again. Link to post Share on other sites
IfiKnewThen Posted June 24, 2011 Share Posted June 24, 2011 baby steps is the key word, ohpenelope. so true. i had a setback of sorts but i am getting back on track again Link to post Share on other sites
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